Resisting You
by ggfan78
Summary: What if Olivia chose not to go into Fitz's hotel room that night?
1. Chapter 1

It would be typical that she find the love of her life and he would not only be married but running for president. Olivia would catch herself looking at him without even knowing it. Their unconsciousness seemed to gravitate towards each other. Without meaning to they always end up in the same space.

"I'm married. I'm running for president."

"I know."

"I can't do this,"

"I don't want you to."

"Can we just stand here? For just one minute. I'm not the candidate and you're not the fixer. For one minute can we just be us?"

"One minute." Olivia relented against her better judgement.

For one minute they stood there staring at each other blocking out the rest of the world. For one minute they were able to pretend that they had a chance. That they were possible.

Olivia knew she was in big trouble. There was no denying that there was something between her and Fitz. Something so strong that it was instinctive. Regardless how hard she tried to put physical and emotional distance between them, something always led them back to each other.

Fitz allowed her in, let her see him and the more he did, the more she believed in him. Believed that he was the real deal and excited for his potential. The more she cared about him and it was getting dangerous. She was his closest counsel and he had become hers. He was just ever present in her life. Interested in everything she had to say, completely supportive in every way. Being on the campaign trail he had easily slipped into the slot of her best friend. They joked around a lot and she tempered his mood and had the innate ability to diffuse him before he even knew he was ticking. Above all else she read him like a book. She knew him. She knew him in ways she probably shouldn't.

Her heart ached for him when Mellie announced the loss of their unborn child and her heart broke for him as he confessed that Mellie told the lie to ensure that he secured the votes of women. Very early on Olivia realised that Mellie was running for First Lady and nothing was going to stop her. She watched in the sidelines how hard Mellie pushed Fitz. Their marriage was rocky at best when she had come into the picture, but the Grant's had to suck it up if they wanted to sell him as a viable republican candidate who places such importance on family values. Out in front of the cameras they learned to be flawless in large part thanks to Olivia who had taught them well. Behind closed doors it was a completely different story. It almost justified the temptation she felt but her conscience always won out and each time it did, it broke a piece of her heart. She wanted him as much as he wanted her and they just fit.

As they got off the elevator, they said their good night to Cyrus and headed towards their rooms they both stopped in front of hers, in contemplation of their next move. Something had shifted on the bus and she tried to console him for his loss. The brief yet significant joining of their fingers confirmed what they'd tried so hard to deny, that they were indeed falling for each other.

"Just go into your room, lets forget this ever happened." Fitz said softly as he stool close behind her. Olivia took a deep breath as she stared past her own door to his. Could she really go along with it. There was no denying that she felt more for him that she'd care to admit, but feeling and acting were two different things and if she acted, there'd be no turning back and there would be no undoing. Olivia turned around to face him, tears streaming down her face.

"I'm sorry Fitz. I can't! It's not right. If I thought you and I were just some fling, maybe I could, but what I feel for you is so intense that if we take this step. I wouldn't know how to let you go. I don't want to be your mistress. I wouldn't know how to live with myself. I'm sorry." Fitz heart broke at the look on her face and the pain in her voice. Before he could say anything she stepped forward to place a brief kiss on his lips and entered her room closing the door behind her. Fitz watched her door for what seemed like an eternity trying to figure out what his next move was. In the end he knew she was right. They couldn't start something, aside from it being wrong, once they began he wouldn't want it to end. It would become their undoing.


	2. Chapter 2

Fitz found it extremely hard to sleep at all that night. A part of him wanted to just walk over to her door and proprieties be damned he would just take her in his arms as he's been wanting to do for months and to hell with the consequences. But she was right. What he felt for her was more than just lust, he loved her down to his very core which surprised and frightened him.

After his shower he was drying off and looked out the window as he dried his hair. His eyes did a double take as he realised Olivia was downstairs in the hotel garden alone pacing in circles which he had learned was her tell when she was worried or upset. Judging from tonight's events he guessed she was both. He wished he could go downstairs and ease her mind but for the very reason why she picked that place was the very reason he couldn't go down. It was too out in the open. Too dangerous. He had to hand it to her, she was always steps ahead. He watched as she paced for what seemed like forever. There was a rhythm to it, a comforting beat. However the emotions that passed through her face was anything but rhythmic or comforting. She felt haunted, suffocated and in complete agony.

As though she sensed him she looked up and saw him staring at her from his window. For a moment he caught a glimpse of the torture she felt as her eyes spoke volumes. It tore at his heart to know he was the reason for her conflict and uneasiness. Once she spotted him watching her she knew whatever thought process she had, was lost. She turned to go inside. After a few minutes when she hadn't showed up on his floor, he grew worried. Just as he got out of his door he saw that Tom had moved from where he was positioned by the elevator securing the floor to standing outside his room.

"Has Ms Pope arrived back?" He asked casually,

"Ms Pope is no longer staying on this floor sir. It seems that there was something wrong with her room and she asked to be moved to another floor." Their whole campaign trail stayed at the same hotel, and Cyrus always made a point of keeping him, Olivia and Fitz on their own floor. Fitz knew her move was not at all coincidental, that though she tried to avoid getting mixed up in the post campaign day festivities she was willing to throw herself in the midst of it just to avoid him and their now very complicated set up. Fitz returned to his room and contemplated whether or not to call her and decided against it giving her some room praying that she didn't bolt in the night.

The next morning Fitz found Cyrus and Olivia in deep conversation in the hotel lobby. Olivia looked up and saw Fitz headed their way.

"Good morning Governor Grant." She greeted,

"Everything okay?" He asked worriedly,

"Of course." She said giving Cy a sideways glance.

"I'm just going to make sure everything is ready for the pancake breakfast. Excuse me." Fitz watched as she practically ran out of there.

"She okay?" Fitz asked,

"Yeah she's fine." Cyrus said somewhat absently not at all convincing Fitz.

During the prayer meeting and pancake breakfast Olivia kept busy. Fitz's eyes followed her wherever she went and she could feel his eyes boring into her as though he was begging her to look at him but she just couldn't she was having a hard time keeping her resolve and one met gaze potentially threatened whatever progress she felt she had made in the last six hours.

It made her sad that it had to be that way, but there was no other way around it. She knew in her heart that somehow she was connected to him, bound to him. He saw right through her and vice versa.

Just as the breakfast was wrapping up Olivia had slipped out undetected. She had waited till Fitz had gone to the bathroom before she made her exit. She knew she was potentially only making it worse but at that moment she just couldn't be around him. It was too hard. As hard as it had become to breathe without him, having to be near him and not have him was equally painful.

Fitz immediately noticed her absence, in almost a panic he scanned the room, but he knew there would be no point as he no longer felt her presence in the room which was always palpable.

They were leaving that afternoon for their next stop. Fitz was hoping to corner her on the bus, surely she couldn't keep dodging him for the rest of the campaign trail. While they were loading up the bus Fitz kept looking out for Olivia.

"Cy, where's Liv?" He asked as they were about to leave.

"Didn't she say goodbye?" Cy asked surprised

"Goodbye?"

"She's gone home. She said there was something she needed to do."

"That's vague."

"That's Liv," Cy replied.

"She'll meet us in a few days." Fitz nodded and headed towards the back of the bus and pulled out his phone.

Olivia watched from the window in her room, as their campaign bus pulled away. She needed to buy herself a couple of days and had told Cy she had to go home to sort out a few things. Things, meaning herself. She prided herself on her instinct and gut but Fitz clouded whatever clarity she had and before she slipped up she needed to get herself together. The beeping of her phone pulled her out of her thoughts.

"Are you okay?" Sighing she contemplated not replying but she owed him more than that.

"Yes thank you. I just need a few days."

"I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for."

"The thing that breaks my heart is that you're the best friend I ever had and I don't want to lose that."

"Me too. We'll be okay. I just need a little space to regroup. I'll see you soon."

"Promise?"

"I promise."


	3. Chapter 3

From the moment that Fitzgerald The Second entered the room, his presence commanded you bow down to him, and annoyingly people did.

Olivia was not prepared for how much she immediately disliked him. It wasn't just that he openly belittled his son in front of everyone, nor was it the fact that he reduced her to an incompetent female who had nothing to offer. She just saw right through him and saw that he was void of substance.

It probably didn't help that for days she had watched the look on Fitz's face as Mellie practically brow beat him into agreeing to have his father join his campaign for political pull. For one it was insulting enough to imply that he couldn't do it on his own, but clearly there was something between Fitz and his father that brought the look of utter torture in his face at the mere mention of Big Gerry.

"You know better!" Fitz declared as he walked away from Mellie,

"Fitz, you have political currency, use it. We're losing, we're lost." She yelled after him. Olivia appeared before them reminding them that voices carry and suggested they move their conversation behind closed doors. Mellie turned to Liv,

"Talk to him. He actually listens to you." Fitz and Olivia looked at each other and watched as Mellie entered their room and closed the door behind her. Fitz wordlessly took Olivia's hand and led her to the empty meeting room they were using on their floor and closed the door behind them.

It had been months since her time out. As promised she returned to the campaign after she re-gathered herself, she knew that if she wasn't able to separate how she felt from the threat of a possibility, she may as well quit because she would be useless to him. She had to make a choice. She wanted him to win. She wanted him to be president. If that meant pushing aside how she truly felt, then she'd do it for as long as she could to ensure she got him over the threshold. If she thought for a moment they could do it without her she would have walked away permanently, but Cyrus begged her to stay because they needed her to win.

"Welcome back," he said uncertainly as she walked into yet another meeting room in another hotel, in another state. She had been gone for a few days and he kept a respectable distance and only messaged her when he had campaign related questions, regardless how transparent they were.

"Thank you Governor Grant."

"Are we okay?" He asked. Olivia met his gaze and nodded.

"Of course."

"I'm sorry if I put us in a position where I made it uncomfortable for us. Your presence meets a lot to me Liv and I don't want to lose that. You're the only person in my life who sees me for who I am. Who doesn't demand anything from me except to be true to myself, I wasn't kidding when I said you're my best friend."

"And I wasn't kidding when I said you were mine. But Fitz that's all we can be. You're married and you have children. I will not be anyone's mistress. Not even for you."

"You would never be a mistress, but I hear you. Please don't run Liv. I need you to win this, not as my fixer but as my friend and closest counsel. As selfish as it sounds I just need you in my life."

"Fitz, I'm not going anywhere. I can't say I'll be around forever, but I promise to get you your presidency."

"That's more than I deserve. Thank you Liv."

"Of course Governor Grant." She replied giving him a small smile before heading over to say hello to Cyrus.

"Liv," he said, the pain so evident in his eyes and in his demeanor.

"Do you really think it's that time?" He asked her.

"I wish it wasn't Fitz because I see how much the mere thought kills you for reasons that obviously go way back and I wouldn't ask you to do it if I didn't feel that you needed it. Though, in saying that, if you really don't want to, I'll stand by you. I work for you and as your friend I stand by you. If it's a no. I'll fight it for as long as I can, but Fitz we're not doing well, and he can only help. He's a beloved senator and governor, and the image of his passing the baton to his son can only help."

"Then do it." He muttered defeatedly. Olivia knew in part it was his pride that prevented him from asking for help, the sheer will to do it on his own. Make it without relying on his political capital. He didn't want the baton to be handed down to him. He wanted to earn it. Then there was the unspoken and unknown that was greater than his pride. Whatever was between Fitz and his father, it was more than just the normal Father and Son issues. It haunted Fitz. Olivia's heart tore looking at him.

"To hell with it," she muttered softly to herself that Fitz missed it. Fitz looked up at her as if to ask what. In spite her better judgment she did the only thing she could think of that she hoped would make him feel better unable to watch the misery on his face for a second longer.

"One minute," she said looking at him right in the eye and he nodded, a moment of reprieve showed briefly in his face. Taking him by complete surprise she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his middle. Instinctively he drew her as close and as tightly to him as possible. He buried his face on her shoulder and breathed her in. In that moment everything was right with the world. He felt that nothing could hurt him. She made him feel safe and loved. For the first time in his life, he felt at home. The sheer realization brought comfort and pain. Olivia bit her lower lip trying to stop the tears that she felt pool around her eyes. She could feel his tears on her shoulder and only tightened her hold on him. In that moment the world seemed so cruel knowing that after their minute they would resume their life apart once more. Reluctantly they parted. Fitz took her face in his hands and wiped her tears away with his thumb.

"Thank you," he said with such love and gratitude that it left very little room to question whether or not she should have done it. He needed to know that he wasn't alone, and after their minute he knew that she was the one person who stood and will stand beside him against all odds.

With clenched fists Olivia was once again listening to Big 'Asshat' Gerry belittle his son. Cyrus recognized the look on Olivia's face, he didn't care for Big 'Asshat' Gerry either but if Olivia blew up in Fitz's defense it would only bring more ridicule. Cyrus placed a hand on her arm and shook his head. His eyes was talking her off her ledge. She sighed deeply knowing any reaction from her would only make things worse. Big 'Asshat' Gerry was the biggest chauvinistic pig she ever met.

In the short time Big Gerry had been with them, Fitz's mood had taken a nosedive. He was drinking more and more, and she was worried about him.

"Cyrus, we need to do something. He's going to either drink himself to the ground or he's going to explode. Is Big Gerry really worth it? Is his presence really making that much of a difference? Is it worth losing him in this? He may win this presidency with Big Gerry's help, but at what cost? At the cost of losing him, because I would rather we lost than lose Fitz in this. We always said he's the real deal right? That should be enough Cy. We can't ruin him in the process of winning this presidency. We're supposed to protect him, and I don't know about you but having Gerry here makes me feel like I've thrown him to the wolves." Olivia said as she paced in circles. Everyone had already gone to bed for the night and Liv asked Cy to meet her downstairs.

"Liv, I don't like this anymore than you do."

"Then let's do something about it Cy. I can't stand to watch him self destruct any longer." Olivia challenged him, the sadness evident in her eyes. She may have never in so many words told him how she felt about Fitz, but as someone who had known her from when she was a little girl, there was no doubt in his mind that Olivia loved Fitzgerald Thomas Grant the Third. She may never act on it, but she felt it, and it consumed her more than she would ever admit to herself, let along him. Olivia needed fresh air. She felt suffocated and caged in like an animal.

"I need to get out of here. I'll see you in the morning." Olivia grabbed her purse, thankful they were in her hometown. It meant she had a house to escape to. After the last couple of weeks with Big Gerry and Fitzgerald the Third, she was ready to claw her way out of her own skin. They had arrived that morning and Olivia had rented a car so that she could get around knowing that she needed the break from them all, if even for only a night.

When her parents had died they had left behind a trust fund, their family home and their summer home in France. Whenever she needed a time out she came home to Boston, which was where she ended up when she left Fitz on his campaign trail months before to re-group. She had a housekeeper come and clean at least once a month to maintain the house. Olivia had called her earlier in the week to let her know she was arriving so that she could prepare the house for her arrival. All she wanted was to go home to her familiar surroundings put her feet up and forget for a moment.

She couldn't help but be angry at Fitz, but what hurt more than her anger was her growing disappointment in him. He was behaving almost as big of an ass as Big Gerry, and it was starting to grate at her.

As soon as she walked into her house she let out a sigh. Immediately she felt comforted by the familiar surroundings. If she closed her eyes, she could almost hear her mother in the kitchen humming as she cooked while her Dad would be telling her about his day. All the while standing behind her with his arms wrapped around her waist as she stirred and ladled.

God she missed them. They made her believe in true love.

Olivia sat on her father's armchair and imagined for a moment that she was sitting curled up beside him as they read together. Though the memories brought her comfort, they also brought loneliness.

The soft knock on the door interrupted her self-induced coma. She tried to ignore it and pretend she wasn't home, but the knocking wouldn't stop. Annoyed she rose from her seat and opened the door,

"WHAT?" she said. She couldn't help but gasp in surprise as she came face to face with Fitzgerald Thomas Grant the Third. Without another thought she slammed the door in his face.

Fitz knew after his behaviour that evening after dinner, the door in his face was the very least he deserved. He had come looking for her to apologise when he heard the conversation between her and Cyrus. It made him feel like a bigger ass than he thought it was even possible.

After a nasty performance of an angry spoilt child, no doubt a result of the many glasses of scotch he had been downing all night he caught Olivia in the elevator. He knew by the way to refuse to meet his eye that she was disappointed in him.

"It's late. You should get to bed." She suggested evenly

"You're mad at me." He said sadly,

"You're drunk Fitz. Sleep it off."

"I don't like it when you're mad at me Liv,"

"I don't like it when you're drunk, so that makes us even." Fitz stepped closer cupping her face with his palm, his thumb caressing her lips.

"Oh Liv, I'm sorry." He slurred leaning over as if to kiss her. Surprised Olivia grabbed his face with both hands,

"No Fitz,"

"Please Liv," he begged,

"Fitz, let's go grab you a cup of coffee and sober you up before you do something that you and I will both regret,"

"Liv…" he said dropping his face to hers again only to have her use all the strength she had to push him fully off her. Stumbling backwards he was shaken out of his drunken stupor and it hit him what he had just tried to do. Shame filled his face, the shock still written all over Olivia's face. Before he could apologise the elevator doors opened and Olivia exited without another word. Fitz was coherent enough to know that she needed some time to cool off.


	4. Chapter 4

Olivia counted to ten and opened the door again knowing that he wouldn't go anywhere till he spoke with her. His eyes pleaded for her forgiveness, his whole demeanor was filled with shame. His head hung apologetically,

"You've wandered a little far from your fishbowl Governor. Do you really think camping outside the home of your campaign fixer is such a great idea? But then again it's been a whole night of bad judgement on your part so why stop at the elevator." Her words made him flinch as the image of what transpired between them in the elevator flashed before his eyes.

"Liv..." Olivia opened the door wider and stepped aside allowing him to enter before closing the door behind him.

"Livvie..."

"No! Don't Livvie me Fitzgerald. You crossed a line today. I don't care what a big ass hat your father is. It does not excuse your behavior, not just tonight but the moment he stepped in to join us. I know what a jack ass he is, anyone who has a moral backbone can see that a mile away but it doesn't mean you get to act like him Fitz." Olivia paused,

Do you even want this? Do you really want to be President?"

"What?" He asked surprised.

"In the last weeks I have watched you lose focus on what you want. Big Gerry comes in and you lose you. You forgot what you're running for, so I'm asking you is this something you really want or are we all just wasting our time? Do you really want this or this just a way for you to stick it to the old man? To accomplish something he didn't, and I would get that but it's not enough Fitz so do us all a favour and figure it out."

"I want it Liv." He said looking right into her eyes. Olivia stepped forward to stand in front of him.

"Then run for president. I know you, I see you because you let me know and see you but Fitz the problem we have is that you haven't shown the American people who you are. They're not going to vote for you if they can't relate to you. If you want Gerry gone, done. I will make that happen for you. But lets do this. While we still have time to turn this around."

"I'm in Liv." He promised.

"Good! Tomorrow I'll have Cyrus send your father home. We'll run this campaign another way. Now that I know what our issue is we can fix it."

"Thank you Liv." Fitz said sincerely tucking a strand of her hair back behind her ear. Olivia froze at his touch and stepped out of his reach.

"I'm so sorry Livvie." He apologized once more.

"Forget me for a moment, what if that elevator opened before I had the chance to push you away Fitz? What if Mellie, or God forbid you children, if they were with us, were standing on the other side of those doors. I know you're sorry. I know you! I knew you would be sorry the moment you walked into that elevator." Olivia started pacing in circles as she continued,

"You have to stop drinking your issues away. You hate your Father, we all get that, especially after tonight's dinner but you're a grown man. You're the better man. Despite the fact he's an ass hat you've turned out to be a great guy. How long are you going to let him run you? You're here running for president because you want to, because of what you dream of doing for this country, not because of him and we will win this without him but you're going to need to be you. Use all that energy you have hating big Gerry and run your own campaign. A clean campaign, win on the merits that you are an incredible person who loves this country and its people. But the American People need to know who you are and you need to start showing them who you are. They need to see what I see."

"Even after tonight?" He asked doubtfully.

"Fitz, one act of stupidity doesn't change you unless you choose for it to. I may be incredibly mad at you right now but I still see right through you. I see my best friend underneath the spoilt child he's been hiding behind these last couple of weeks. I know that he's been hiding because he thinks it protects him from what makes him so vulnerable. Fitz you can stand up to Gerry without it being ugly. Don't stoop to his level. You're better than that." Fitz didn't know what he did to deserve her but he was grateful. She was his saving grace. His one voice of reason.

"Does anyone know you're even missing?" She asked as he shook his head.

"Mellie locked me out of the bedroom. I have the couch in the suite waiting for me."

"And yes, I do deserve it." He added making her almost chuckle.

"I'd offer you the guest room but that's all kinds of inappropriate."

"I know. Can I hang here for awhile? I'm sober and acutely aware of my countless acts of stupidity the last weeks and I don't really want to relieve them all right now."

"I'm tempted to let you suffer but I won't. Let me drop Cy a message to let him know in case he has a coronary when he realises he's missing his presidential candidate. Have a seat." Fitz nodded and sat on the sofa nearest to him as Olivia went into the kitchen while typing a message to Cyrus. She came back a few minutes later holding two cups of coffee. Fitz was staring at the wall with all their photos. From when she was a baby up to when her parents died in a car accident when she was in her last year at college.

"Is that Cyrus Beene?" Fitz asked pointing at a picture of Cyrus with her parents on the day of her christening.

"No, that's Uncle Cy, my godfather. Cyrus Beene is a great political strategists. That man," she sad pointing to the several photos of Cyrus at the most significant moments of her life,

"Is the man who helped raise me, and kept me above water when I lost my parents." She said solemnly.

"I didn't realise you went that far back." Fitz said surprised. It explained a lot. The way Cyrus was so protective and proud of her. Why Cyrus' approval meant so much to her.

"Way back in the womb. He and my parents were childhood friends, he was my Mom's cousin and my Dad's best friend. I don't remember an occasion that Uncle Cy ever missed. No matter where he was, he would always make sure he was around for the biggish things and the not so big things. When they died, I didn't think it was possible for someone to be more heart broken than I was, but Uncle Cy gave me a run for my money. He was a little older than my mom so he always looked out for her. My Mom always told me that she worshipped the ground he walked on when she was growing up, and we used to tease her that she still did. And she did till the day she died."

"How long has it been?" Fitz asked

"Five years this year. Some days it feels like it was only yesterday. I had just finished my exams and was excited to come home. My Mom and I had these big plans to go shopping, and Dad had promised we'd go hiking. Most kids avoided coming home for the holidays, but not me. Despite my parents busy careers, Mom was an obstetrician who had her own practice and Dad was a heart surgeon, I never felt that they were ever not there. Mom practiced a lot less after I was born, and Dad just somehow made it work. Dad taught for awhile too so he could be home more. I loved being with them. They always made me feel safe and loved. The three of us were our very own version of the three Muskeeters, and when Uncle Cy was around we were the awesome foursome. I was about to get into my car and drive home when I saw Uncle Cy leaning against my car. He was trying to work up the nerve to come to my dorm room to tell me. I knew by the look on his face that nothing was ever going to be the same again and it wasn't. They were hit by a truck driver who had fallen asleep at the wheel. Mom and Dad died on impact." Fitz had watched the emotions play out on her face as she kept staring at the photographs on the wall. It may have been five years ago but the pain in her face told him that to her it was as though no time had passed.

"I'm so sorry you only had them for such a short time." Olivia turned to him and gave him a small smile,

"It may not have been for as long as I would have wanted but I know how lucky I am to have had what I had with them. I've never felt anything less than completely loved, adored and cared for. I never take that for granted."

"Thank you for sharing that with me. Growing up as the eldest and only boy there was a whole lot of expectation from the son of the national treasure, self made man, two terms governor, four times senator. All I remember as a boy was his plans for my life. He was grooming me for Presidency. It's all I ever known and I was happy to go along with that. Christ even marrying Mellie was a political move." He admitted.

"Her father and my father had planned for it. You were right to ask me if I wanted it, and months ago before we were campaigning I would tell you I wanted it, but it would be for the reason you accused me of. Which is mainly that reason why I didn't want him here because I didn't want his help and have that hanging over my head, that he won me my presidency. But something threw me off course. I met you." He said holding her gaze, Olivia who realised she stopped breathing reminded herself to take a breath

"Meeting you made me realise what I can do, what kind of change I could make and what impact I could have on the generations to come. You made me take responsibility for the position I strived for, that it wasn't just about the title but the opportunity to make a difference. The only reason I agreed to let my father join the campaign was because that was worth more than whatever he could throw my way, but I guess I didn't prepare myself enough for what was coming because as you saw, his mere presence reduced me to a rebellious and stupid teenage boy."

"If it at all makes you feel better Cyrus had to non verbally talk me off a ledge earlier so I would tell your father to shove it when he was talking to you this morning at the meeting. He literally kept his hand on my arm the whole time in preparation of yanking me back in case I made my way over to your Dad to give him the biggest slap known to man." Fitz laughed heartily at the image.

"Can you imagine?"

"I can, and I have to say Liv it's now my happy place and thank you for caring about me that much." He's aid gratefully. Olivia shrugged nonchalantly making her way to the couch as he followed close behind.

"I heard you and Cy earlier. I don't think anyone has ever fought for me the way you have, well my Mom and my Baby sister Bella. Mom as always the one who tried to put Big Gerry in his place. She tried so hard for us to understand each other and it just never happened. On my tenth birthday I came to his office and as I got to the door I saw him banging his secretary and I guess you could say the already fragile and somewhat fractured relationship we had, finally broke to irreparable pieces and you know what, he didn't care. He cheated on her constantly and when she got sick, it was as though that justified his actions. Her cancer was advanced and she didn't last long, but I can count how many times he was actually there with her, and for her. I would have forgiven everything if he had just stepped up those last months, but he never did. I can't forgive him for that Liv because to her last breath she as still defending him and he didn't even have the decency to uphold his vow of 'through sickness'."

"I'm sorry Fitz." She said placing a hand over his giving it a squeeze. It explained everything Olivia needed to know. Had she know it from the beginning she would never have invited Big 'Asshat' Gerry along for the ride.


	5. Chapter 5

True to her word Big Gerry was on his way back to California by lunch time the next day due to some unforseen emergency that he had to get back to. Mellie was overly disappointed, while the gleam in Fitz's eye had returned. The absence of Big Gerry changed the whole atmosphere of the campaign, one that was welcomed by all, well with the exception of Millicent Grant. Fitz had wanted to take Olivia aside to thank her but she had been running around all day restructuring his campaign. She worked with each team giving them the new brief. Every time Fitz tried to corner her Cyrus was there to intercept, if not one of her aides. Fitz had to wonder if she had set that up. He knew that she forgave him for the night before, but he also knew she had set new boundaries with him as a result.

"Governor Grant, how would you feel about having Karen and Gerry with you full time during the campaign?" Olivia asked as they sat in a meeting with Cyrus and their core campaign staff.

"Family values is big, and I know you like to protect them keep them away from public eye but it gives the impression that you're hiding them. I think it'd be great for your campaign to see just how you interact with your kids. Not for the sake of show, but so they could see you and who you are. Having them around will put you in your natural element, you'll be carefree and unguarded and I think the American people need to see that if we are going to reshuffle this campaign."

Fitz knew that Olivia would never subject his children to the media circus. That aside from it being good for the public eye she knew that having his kids with him made him happy. Their going to boarding school was always a bone of contention between him and Mellie.

"Let me run in past them first. I want it to be their decision." Fitz answered thoughtfully. Olivia nodded and moved on to the next point. When the meeting had adjourned Olivia looked at the time and looked over at Cyrus who just nodded. Fitz did not miss the rather cryptic exchange between them. Olivia picked up her bag from underneath her chair.

"I think we've made a great headway. There's not much else to really do, and I can finish off what I have from home. I'm done for the day."

"I'll walk you out Liv," Cyrus piped up while she gave him a nod.

"Get some rest Governor, tomorrow's a new day." Olivia said with a reassuring smile.

"Before you go can I have a word?" Fit asked.

"I'll give you a couple of minutes. Grab me when you're ready." Cyrus said throwing her a glance that Fitz wasn't quite sure how to discern.

"What's up?"

"Thank you, for everything." He said meaningfully.

"Of course Governor." She replied, earning a somewhat disapproving look from him.

"Governor? Really Liv?"

"I don't know what you want me to say."

"Since when does what I want you to say ever apply?" He asked,

"We can't... I know but I can't pretend that,"

"Then learn Fitz. You have to. There is too much at risk and I've already screwed up once."

"What do you mean?" Fitz inquired confused.

"If I wasn't so emotionally involved I would have been able to see that we were going about your campaign in the wrong way. I would have caught it. But because you let me in I turned a blind eye and assumed you let everyone in. It almost cost you. If I hadn't gotten sloppy on the job, we wouldn't have needed your father."

"That's ridiculous."

"Is it? My gut is never wrong and ever since you and I, and whatever this is I've been off my game. This is too big for me to be off my game. The consequences are far too high to be off my game."

"What are you saying Liv?"

"That I care too much about you. More than I should. You're married. You have children. You're not available. Yet I am still so drawn to you. Every fibre of my being knows its not right but my soul still aches to be near yours. So despite how wrong it is, how against it is by my moral code I still find myself gravitating towards you. It's like my whole being is in unrest till its near you and then it's like,"

"Home," he finished for her as he looked her right in the eye seeing the emotions that haunted her. As she looked back at him she knew that he felt the same way, and it tore her apart how much it pleased her.

"This isn't me. I am not this person. I don't want to be in this anymore." Panic overtook Fitz, unsure of where there conversation was headed. Losing her was not an option. He looked around the empty room, thankful that Cyrus had closed the door behind him .

"Livvy," his voice pleaded.

"Fitz, there is no right in this. I know you know that so please don't make this any harder than it already is. Be fair, please Fitz you know this isn't easy for me."

"I don't want you to go."

"If I stay it'll be my undoing and possibly yours."

"Liv..."

"I'll stay for the rest of the campaign, I promised to get you through to your presidency, but I am asking you to please allow me my boundaries."


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you so much for reading and for those who take the time to review, I am grateful! I hope you enjoy today's installment!**

To say that Olivia was relieved when Gerry and Karen jumped at the chance to join Fitz on the campaign would be an understatement. Aside from Olivia adoring them, and genuinely loved spending time with them, they made great buffers.

Liv had taken it upon herself to pick the kids up from boarding school. She was a prominent and trusted member of the governor's staff and if the Governor and his wife couldn't pick them up right from school, it looked acceptable to have one of his trusted collect them. Especially since they openly adored her.

Gerry was fifteen years old who was as caring and as passionate as Fitz. He was ambitious and driven, protective and loyal. He doted on his little sister Karen who was twelve, and in return she thought he hung the moon and the stars. Both of the Grant children were well rounded. From the beginning Liv saw that it was Fitz who grounded them and vice versa. Whenever he was with them he would light up and regardless of what was around them, it was as though they were the only ones in the room.

"LIV!" Karen squealed with excitement as she spotted her in the school office. Within seconds Olivia was wrapped around Karen's arms.

"Hey sweet girl! I've missed you. Both of you." She said looking up at Gerry as she returned Karen's hug.

"Hey Liv, thanks for breaking us out of prison." He whispered in her ear as he wrapped his arms around both Karen and Liv.

"You're welcome, but you can thank your Dad. It was his doing."

"But it was your idea." Gerry said pointedly. He had no doubt that his father wanted them out of boarding school, he never wanted them in there in the first place, but he knew it was Liv who made a way for them to be out. Olivia just smiled and ruffled his hair,

"You two packed and ready to go?"

"Karen's been packed since Dad asked." Gerry answered teasingly at Karen who giggled nodding.

"Well lets get going then." Bill who was the assigned detail for the Grant kids gave her a nod to let her know that he had loaded up the car with their belongings.

Karen talked most of the plane ride to meet the campaign where they were. She was still talking non stop when they got off the plane with her arms wrapped around Liv's waist. Liv listened with genuine interest as she looked down at her every so often lovingly, Gerry who piped in every so often stood close to Olivia as he carried his back pack as well as Karen's.

Fitz's heart tightened at the sight of them as they came out of the arrival doors. Karen still wrapped around Liv while Gerry looked up at Olivia adoringly as the three of them were engaged in a lively conversation. He and Mellie were there to greet their kids, as per Cyrus' brief. He would have picked them up regardless but now there was a photographer to document the occasion and will somehow conveniently be leaked to the press in time for the six o'clock news. He hated the charade, but he was comforted by the fact that he finally had his kids with them.

"Hey guys look who's waiting for you." Liv said pointing to Fitz. Karen and Gerry beamed at the sight of their father and ran towards him. Fitz dropped to his knee, opened his arms and caught Karen in them lifting her off the ground, pure joy written all over his face. As he set Karen down, Fitz pulled Gerry into their embrace. Fitz had to remind himself to release them so that they could greet their mother. The exchange was a little awkward but Campaign Mellie eventually kicked in that to the naked eye it was almost seamless. Cyrus caught Liv's sigh of relief as he made it to her side giving her a brief but meaningful hug.

"She got there eventually," he said quietly.

"I don't get it Cy. It's not like they're hard to love." She replied softly as they walked a safe distance between the Grant Family.

Olivia jumped into the SUV behind the family SUV with Cyrus so they could go through the following day's schedule.

Olivia did her utmost to keep respectable distance from Fitz which she found realistically possible with Karen and Gerry around. She tailored much of his campaign around them and his relationship with them which turned out to be the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Immediately his numbers started climbing. Which was more than enough to placate Mellie for bringing them into the campaign which was something she fought them on in the beginning. After much convincing, a tutor/nanny thrown in Mellie eventually and definitively reluctant finally succumbed. Cyrus didn't have the heart to tell Mellie that she was never going to win that argument regardless how she felt.

Olivia fought the frustration she felt at the way Mellie interacted with her children. She loved her children, she just didn't connect with them, nor did she try to and Olivia found herself trying her best to fix it as she did with Mellie And Fitz. Little by little they were getting there, but it was still evident that Fitz was their primary parent and that their love and affection was not at all equally divided.

Fitz missed Olivia. He missed talking to her, he missed having her as his confidant but he had to respect her wishes. He knew that if he pushed, she could and would bolt and that was the last thing he wanted. He would rather have them in the same room barely talking than not having her there at all.

Truth was Olivia missed Fitz just as much as he missed her, and there was an ache in her for him that she fought consciously on the minutely basis. She found herself counting down the days to election so that she could finally put physical distance between them. She didn't know how much longer she could bare it.

She had finally confided in Cyrus about her feelings just so he could run as interference and having him do that made it easier.

"Hey Dad can Gerry and I go to the movies?" Karen asked. They had been on the road for a couple of weeks and the novelty of no longer being at school was quickly wearing off."

"I don't know Karen, I'd really like for you guys to have an adult with you at all times. I can see if Uncle Cyrus can move my schedule around a little and take you and Gerry in a couple of days."

"We love you Dad but we're a little over the cameras and as much as we'd love to hang with you, as a presidential candidate you have a traveling paparazzi following your every move." Gerry explained.

"Can we take Liv instead?" Karen pleaded. Fitz looked up at Liv,

"I don't know guys, Liv might be busy." Liv caught the pout beginning to form on Karen's lips and walked over to intercept.

"Hey, no need for pouting. I can take them Governor. They deserve a little down time. I was going to suggest I take them off your hands tomorrow but they beat me to it. If you and Mrs Grant are okay with it I'd like to take them out for the day?" Karen jumped up and down in excitement grabbing her Dad's hand,

"Please Daddy? Please?" Fitz grinned and cupped his daughters chin affectionately.

"How can I say no to that face. As long as its okay with you Liv. I know that there are other ways you can use your time away from the campaign." Truth was she never took any down time, even on weekends she would be crunching numbers or running extra errands for the campaign.

"Nothing I'd rather be doing than hanging out with my favourite twelve and fifteen year old." Fitz pulled out his wallet but Olivia shook her head,

"No, this one's on me. It's my day. Go grab your coats." Karen and Gerry ran to get their things.

"Thank you."

"You so don't have to thank me. I love hanging with those two. We're going to have a blast. I'm sorry you can't be with them. Maybe I can arrange for the pool in the hotel to be closed off and you, Mellie and the kids can just hang out. No cameras, just your family."

"That would be great. They hate having the paparazzi follow them around. They've been such good sports that I would really like to do something for them without having to weigh the political gain."

"Leave it with me. I'll sort something out."

"Thank you Liv." He said sincerely knowing she was the only one who understood him.

"Of course. You're doing great. We're going to win this." She said confidently.

"You think?"

"I know." Olivia replied smiling. As their eyes met they both stilled. Behind their eyes lay so many words unspoken. The longing, the ache, the sadness. Olivia tore her gaze away and refocused on the kids who were on their way back to them.

"Let's go. Say goodbye to your Dad and we'll head off."

Karen and Gerry gave Fitz a hug before excitedly following Olivia out the door. They had taken the exit through the kitchen to avoid the paparazzi that were camped out front of the hotel. By taking Liv's hired car which was a Jeep and having only one security detail, it allowed them to escape without detection.

"It's only going to get worse once he becomes a President isn't it?" Gerry said somewhat rhetorically as he sat in the front seat while Liv drove, Karen and Bill in the back seat.

"Afraid so," Olivia answered sympathetically. Gerry appreciated that she didn't bother trying to convince him otherwise, that she was always upfront with them.

"Hey Liv, if Dad wins you're coming to the White House with us aren't you?" Olivia looked at him surprised.

"I mean I know you're his campaign manager now but surely you can do something similar in the White House?"

"I hadn't really thought about it Ger. the end game was always just to get your Dad to the White House."

"Would you stay if Dad offered you a job?" He pried.

"Why all the questions?" She asked curiously as he shrugged.

"I don't know. I just can't imagine being at the White House and not having you there. You're family."

"Ger, you know whether or not I'm at the White House, however this may play out, I will always be here for you both. You can call me anytime. We can hang out like we do now. I don't hang with you guys because I work for your Dad. We hang because we have loads of fun together and I care about you both very much, and that isn't measured by geography." Gerry seemed placated momentarily so Olivia took the opportunity to change the subject. How was she going to tell him that she was counting down the days so that she wouldn't have to be in the same room as his Dad because every moment she spent in his presence burned so much it hurt to breathe because she loved him in a way she knew she shouldn't.


	7. Chapter 7

Resisting You: 7

It was literally days before Election and they had done everything they possibly could to secure Fitz's chance at Presidency.

"Come on Cy, there's nothing else for us to do. Really, what do you need me here for?"

"You really don't want to be here to see all the work you've done come to fruition?" He asked in disbelief.

"The view would be just as good from my lounge room Cy." Olivia said with a shrug sitting on the bed in Cyrus' hotel room.

"Liv..."

"I can't Cy. I don't want to." Olivia was well aware that she sounded like a petulant child, but after weeks and months of Fitz, his wife and beautiful children, she was ready for some alone time.

"I need a holiday."

"Don't we all. Liv, I won't stop you."

"I'm sensing a but here Uncle Cy," Cyrus smiled. She rarely called him Uncle Cy, she saved them for the moments she felt he was about to get paternal.

"You're running," he observed pointedly.

"I am well aware of that Uncle Cy. If I could have done it earlier, I would have done it already." Olivia replied.

"Liv,"

"He's married Uncle Cy, with kids I love. I can't. It's too hard to be around him. He's going to be president in a couple days for goodness sake and I want out before I land myself in trouble."

"Are you going to at least say goodbye?"

"To the kids yes, to him not so much."

"Liv..."

"You and I both know where that conversation will lead."

"When are you planning to head off?"

"As soon as you let me out of here so I can say goodbye to the kids." She answered playfully as he rolled his eyes. He knew she was trying to leave while Fitz was occupied, and for the next few hours he was at the local town hall meeting with the mayor which gave her ample to time to scurry away.

"And what am I supposed to say to him?"

"That my job is done and I've headed home back to my life. This was just a favour Uncle Cy, not a career move." Cyrus let out an exasperated sigh.

"Fine. Go!" Olivia jumped to her feet and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you Uncle Cy. Let me know when you're around my neighborhood and we'll do dinner."

"He'll find you."

"Not if I'm not in the country." She answered leaving his hotel room.

Olivia went to the Grant's suite and knocked on the door. Gerry answered and grinned upon seeing Olivia,

"Hey Liv,"

"You and and your sister up for some ice cream?"

"Yes!" Karen yelled from the couch. Olivia smiled,

"Where's your Mom?"

"She out for something." Gerry answered vaguely

"Ah, leave a note in case she looks for you. Tell her we're just in the hotel lobby having Ice Cream."

"Done," Karen said throwing the notepad on the table. The three of them headed down to the lobby engaged in a lively conversation.

"So there's something I have to tell you guys," she began,

"What's up Liv?"

"I got called back to work so I have to head back in a few hours."

"You're leaving?" Karen said tearfully,

"Yeah sweetheart but you have my number, you can call or text me any time."

"But the election is in a couple of days."

"And my job here is done. There's nothing else left for me to do."

"So you won't be here for the results?" Gerry asked.

"Probably not kiddo."

"So we're never going to see you again?"

"Of course you will. What do I keep telling you?"

"That we're not your job. That you love and care for us outside this campaign. That you will always be there for us." Karen repeated,

"That's right. When have I ever lied to you or promised something I couldn't deliver?"

"Never," Gerry answered.

"Then you both know that all it takes is a call and I am there for you."

After their ice cream Olivia hugged them both goodbye and loaded up her car. She had planned to leave and not say goodbye but she owed Fitz more than that. With her car all ready to go she made her way to the Town Hall. Fitz was just finishing up with the mayor and smiled as he saw her at the back of the auditorium. She was answering emails on her blackberry when he sat beside her.

"So..." He began,

"So...in a couple of days."

"I know, it's crazy. Thank you. For everything. For running this campaign with the integrity I wanted and for believing in me."

"Of course. You're going to make a great President Fitz and I am so proud of you. I just wanted you to know that."

"Thank you Liv, that means a lot to me. I don't think I could have done this without you. Actually I know I couldn't have done this without you."

"Of course."

"Listen,"

"It's okay. Really."

"In another time,"

"I know. Promise me one thing,"

"Name it Liv,"

"Whatever happens, whoever and however hard they're pushing you, stay true to who you are. You are going to do great things and you can only be great if you remain you, so promise me that you go with your gut and no one else's"

"I promise."

"Good." Olivia stood to her feet and looked at him.

"I'll see you around Governor." Olivia gave him a smile and placed a hand on his shoulder briefly before leaving the auditorium.


	8. Chapter 8

True to her word Olivia watched the election from her couch with such vigilance that she may as well have been sitting in the campaign headquarters with the rest of them, but she had made a decision and she was sticking to it, knowing that morally, emotionally and every which way she thought about it, it was the right thing to do for herself, for him and all those involved, whether it be directly or indirectly.

She had received a phone call from him that night after she had left, though he wanted to be mad at her, he couldn't. Truth was, she was the braver one out of the two of them. She dared to walk away when she knew he couldn't. He was grateful that in her own way she said goodbye and not just left without a word. It only showed him that what they had in the innocence that it remained meant as much to her as it did to him.

"I guess I should say thank you for sort of saying goodbye." He said flatly without saying hello as she answered,

"I thought about it. I thought it might be easier, but I owed you more than that. I owed our friendship more than that. I meant what I said Fitz, you can do this. When you win, run with it and do everything you want to do with this presidency. You have the vision. Go for it."

"You sure Communications Director doesn't sound at all appealing to you?" He dangled in her face one more time,

"In another lifetime maybe, if the close proximity to the President didn't put my morality in question on the hourly basis." She answered with a chuckle,

"Damn that moral compass of yours." He answered. Their conversations and banter always came too easily.

"Fitz, you can't keep calling me." She said suddenly as if to remind them both that any form of communication always led to intimacy and it would almost just be like cheating anyway, not to mention dangerous. Fitz sighed deeply,

"I know. It just feels like I finally found my best friend in the whole world and you're telling me I can never speak to her again."

"Me too, but we can't do this. Too many people can get hurt. Mellie and I may be polar opposites but I respect her, she's your wife. Her aside, I love your kids and I would never want to hurt them."

"I know. Promise me you'll take my call on election night. Win of lose. Or merely to talk me off a ledge."

"That's what you have Cyrus for, to talk you off ledges, but sure you can call me. That is I don't find something else better to do that night like I don't know, go on a hot date or something."

"You're hilariously funny Olivia Pope."

"I know right! Goodnight Governor. Good luck on election night."

"Thank you Livi."

She almost expected him to call the moment ball got rolling on election night, she even mentally prepared for it, and he truly wanted to but he words didn't call on deaf ears, so instead he spent that time playing balderdash with his children. Throughout the evening both Gerry and Karen were on the phone text messaging and he guessed with Liv as they have been since she had left only days before. As much as he missed her, he knew they did too. Equally so. While Karen confided in her with girl talk, Fitz knew that Gerry trusted her implicitly and often bounced thoughts off to her.

Fitz looked up to see Cyrus on the phone staring at the TV screen as he talked, nodding every so often. He watched as Cy grabbed the numbers from one of the aides and head back to the screen. It was a close election and there was no definitive on who would win which is why Fitz was willing to bet that it was Olivia in the other side of the call talking his future chief of staff off his proverbial ledge.

"Breathe Cy! It'll be okay. You got this."

"You should be here Liv,"

"What, you doubt my abilities to be able to talk you off a ledge over the phone?" She teased

"You're hilarious,"

"And cute, don't forget cute."

"It's all fun and games when you're so far away."

"Seriously Uncle Cy, he'll win and you'll be the Chief of Staff."

"You know..."

"Don't even Uncle Cy." She said making sure he didn't finish his sentence. She knew he would lead with Communications Director and as tempting as it was, it would be playing with fire.

"Sorry kid. So I have a few days off once this is all done. James misses you and wants to have you over for dinner."

"Yes he mentioned that this afternoon. You forget your boyfriend loves me more than you do."

"Hey,"

"Fine almost as much as you do. I'll talk to you after you win. Bye Uncle Cy." Liv said hanging up and throwing her phone on the desk before heading to her kitchen to make herself some popcorn. When she phone rang again she groaned and reached for it without looking at the screen.

"Seriously Uncle Cy man up, you can do this. One would think you were running for president."

"Nice Liv, you're lucky it's me." Fitz said laughing,

"Sorry Governor. As you can tell I've been getting phone calls from him all night."

"I find it slightly unfair that you get to talk Cyrus off his ledges and not me."

"Really, your presidency is within your reach and you're feeling out of sorts because I'm talking Cyrus off his ledge?" Liv said incredulously.

"Well,"

"How are you?" She asked

"Not too bad. The little brats have been really good with keeping me distracted."

"I heard they were kicking your butt in board games."

"Well I canned the idea of the play station Dance mat."

"Killjoy!"

"Yes because when they announce my presidency I want the world to know that I was dancing to the Cure's 'Friday I'm in love'," Olivia giggled to herself quietly,

"Are you laughing at me?" He asked,

"Um no, of course not."

"If I didn't know any better I'd say that was your suggestion,"

"I resent that," she exclaimed trying to sound outraged but he saw right through her.

"Well I wouldn't have picked the Cure."

"No because you have a mean streak and would have picked some Kylie Minogue song."

"You got that right. Go back to your game. I'll no doubt talk to you later."

"Bye Liv,"

"Bye governor."

Olivia wished it wasn't so easy to talk to him, but it was almost second nature. Which was why it was impossible to consider remaining just friends. They were just so drawn to each other that their intimacy was inappropriate even if they didn't act upon their impulses.

An hour later they had announced that he had won and Olivia was ecstatic. She watched as the Grant family huddled together. Fitz had Gerry in one arm and Karen I the other while Mellie stood on the other side of Karen grinning happily. Her dream to move into the White House was finally a reality.

"I told you he'd win," Olivia answered her phone without any salutations,

"Okay okay. There's a lobster dinner in your Future.

"Damn straight!"

"He looks happy," she said as she watched him on TV

"He should be. We just won him the presidency." Olivia chuckled and turned her TV off.

"Enjoy your night Uncle Cy, you deserve it. I'll talk to you soon."

"Night Kid."

Olivia didn't bother putting anything away and just climbed into bed. Despite the thoughts that were running through her head she fell straight to sleep. When he phone rang hours later she groaned,

"What! I swear Uncle Cy if you're drunk dialing me you and I are going to have words." She threatened.

"I'm sorry I didn't realise you would be sleeping already."

"Oh hey, sorry. Congratulations Mr President elect."

"Thank you. I wanted to call to thank you. You got me here."

"You're welcome Fitz. You're the right man for the job. I'm looking forward to watching you change the world."

"You makes sound like a super hero."

"To your kids you certainly are, and the millions of people whose lives you're going to change with your ideas you will be. So knock 'em dead."

"Liv..."

"Yeah,"

"I wish you were coming with me."

"Me too, but this is how it has to be."

"I know. I guess this is it," Olivia's eyes opened and her breathing evened,

"I guess it is. Enjoy the ride Mr President."

"You take care Livvie."

"You too Fitz,"

"Hey Liv,"

"Yeah?"

"One minute?" Liv unable to speak for a moment nodded,

"One minute," she finally replied her voice cracking. For the next minute they sat in silence listening to each other's breathing. For a minute they could almost pretend.

"Bye Fitz," Olivia said softly before hanging up not waiting for him to reply.


	9. Chapter 9

"Come on Cy, you could be a little happier for me." Olivia pointed out as she switched the phone from one ear to the other.

"It's the US Ambassador for France. It's a great opportunity and you know it."

"It's not..."

"Communications Director for POTUS I know. I know." She completed his sentence with an eye roll. Months into Fitz's presidency Cy was still relentless. She knew that she was the reason why they haven't appointed a Communication Director hoping she would change her mind. In the meantime Britta Kagen had been running the show as a Senior Press Secretary and doing a great job.

"Cy, I'm never going to take that job. You know that and more importantly you know the reason why I won't." Cyrus grumbled,

"Uncle Cy it sure would be nice if you could be proud of me right now. I did just score a pretty awesome job," immediately Cyrus felt guilty.

"Of course I'm proud of you Kid. You'll just be so far away."

"It's a short plane ride away."

"Eight hours is short?"

"You know what I mean."

"Fine, I'm happy for you."

"Don't over exert yourself with the love and support Cy." Olivia said dryly.

"Just so you know, next time I'm calling James first. I don't question his love for me."

"That's a bit harsh Liv," Cyrus protested

"Well you're sucking as a beloved Uncle/Godfather right now." She retorted,

"Ouch! I'm sorry. I'm just going to miss you that's all."

"Whatever,"

"So when do you leave?"

"A couple of weeks? Just closing up the apartment and handing over at work."

"Two weeks? That's so soon."

"I know right, so be nice to me. You won't see me for awhile I imagine."

"Are you going to tell him?"

"Cy, he's not my keeper. I haven't seen nor heard from him since election night as agreed upon. I've got a catch up date with the kids this weekend so he'll know soon enough if it hasn't made it through the grapevine yet. I mean he did appoint Wes one would assume he'd find out who was who in his administration." Cyrus knew that the news hadn't hit Fitz yet, otherwise he would have heard it before Liv had the chance to tell him.

"So dinner?"

"Love how it takes you twenty minutes into conversation to want to arrange dinner with your beloved Goddaughter while it takes James all of picking up the phone to tell me he's missed me and demand I come over for dinner pronto. I may just trade you in Uncle Cy. At least I know where James' loyalty lies." She teased knowing that he was already feeling guilty.

"You can't trade me in. We share DNA."

"Mere technicalities."

"So dinner?" He repeated exasperatedly making Olivia laugh,

"Tomorrow night as arranged by and with my favourite Uncle James."

"Good, I will see you then you little brat. I have to go. I have incoming." Cyrus said as his office door opened.

"Bye!" Olivia said quickly knowing who he meant, making him chuckle. Cyrus watched as Fitz sat in the chair in front of his desk not saying a word, which Cyrus deduced was his way of telling him that he'd just found out who the US Ambassador for France has just chosen as his right hand person.

"I've literally just found out." He began before Fitz asked the question,

"It's a great opportunity for her." Fitz said as played with the Rubiks cube that was sitting on Cyrus' desk which ironically had come from Olivia. She always teased him that his office was always so serious and that he needed a little colour on his desk if not just something she could play with when she was visiting. The memory made him smile.

"It is a great opportunity for her. She loves France. She and her folks spent almost every summer of her childhood there and whatever time they could in between. She's fluent in French." Cyrus said somewhat proudly making Fitz chuckle,

"Liv makes you soft Cy." Fitz teased.

"She'd argue that point. As we speak James has just trumped me as number one on her speed dial. Apparently my loyalties are a little blurry Sir." Cyrus recounted with an eye roll clearly amused.

"I'm sure she'll find a way for you to make it up to her."

"You know she would."

Olivia was packing up boxes in her apartment that evening, sorting through clothes. She was grateful that she had never been a pack rat. It made the thought of moving her life to another country more bearable. She grinned at sound of her home phone ringing,

"Awww Uncle Cy, you do care."

"I'm sure he does. But it's not Uncle Cyrus." Olivia gasped realising who it was.

"It's a secure line Liv." He assured her.

"Hi," she stammered trying to pull herself together.

"So I heard that there's an opening to the slot of your Speed Dial number one." Olivia laughed,

"Sorry Mr President as per my last conversation with my so called favourite uncle, it's already been filled."

"Ouch for Cy,"

"He'll live. So did he rat me out?" Fitz chuckled,

"No he didn't. I do have other connections."

"Ahh, that's right. It comes with your day job." She teased.

"Congratulations Liv. You deserve it. It's a great opportunity for you." Fitz said genuinely,

"Thank you." She replied in appreciation.

"How are you?"

"I'm good. How's life in the White House?"

"Meh, you know. Busy."

"He says ever so casually."

"Yeah well. I wouldn't want you to think it was all going to my head of anything."

"God forbid."

"So what's the plans?"

"Handing over this week, packing in between and just getting ready really. For the most part I'm just excited. I haven't really been to France in awhile so I'm really looking forward to it."

"Did you want me to tell the kids?" He asked. Even though they haven't talked, he knew that she was still in contact with his kids. They had regular dates and spoke to her almost on the daily basis. He knew she was their lifeline in their new life filled with chaos.

"I'd like to do it if you don't mind. We have a pizza and movie date at mine tomorrow so I was going to do it face to face."

"Of course. They're going to miss you even more."

"Me too." She replied, somehow they both knew they weren't just talking about the kids anymore. Olivia cleared her throat snapping them both out of their little reverie.

"I better go. Thank you for calling,"

"Of course. You take care Livi."

"You too Mr President."

Olivia found it hard to be productive after talking to Fitz. After so many months of no contact it was still so easy, perhaps too easy to just pick up where they left off. Only confirming that her decision to not join them at the White House was the right one. There was no denying how much she missed him, and she knew without a doubt that he missed her. If she were honest with herself she'd admit that when she was first offered the job she almost called him in her excitement. He was the first person she wanted to tell. Cyrus may have been the number one on her speed dial, but instinctively it was his number her heart wanted to dial.

There was always a peace within him after he had heard her voice and it was a feeling he tried to hold on to for as long as he could. He respected the boundaries she had set, especially as there was nothing he could offer her. She deserved to be someone who didn't have to hide who she loved, or to be hidden by someone who loved her in return. Even if he was the one who loved her so much.

It was one thing to miss her when they lived in the same city. It was another to miss her when she was an eight hour plane ride away. To have her so far away unnerved him for many reasons, not for just the obvious.

Liv knew it was going to be a hard task telling the Grant kids about her new job and relocation. So when they arrived at her house she made sure that the boxes were out of sight till she had the chance to tell them.

"So the pizza is on the way, what did you guys choose to watch after all that." Olivia asked as she came back to her living room with drinks. Gerry and Karen looked at each with a grin before turning back to her,

"The Breakfast Club," they answered in unison.

"I don't know why I bother asking," she said laughing. The three of them had an uncanny attachment to the movie and their appreciation for it was almost cult like.

"Hey before we start, I need to talk to you guys about something."

"What's up Liv?" Gerry asked worriedly,

"I got offered a job the other day for the US Ambassador for France."

"Oh Wow! That's amazing. Congratulations Liv." Gerry said proudly throwing his arms around her.

"Thanks Ger," she said hugging him back. Liv looked at Karen and by the look of her face she knew what it truly meant.

"So you're moving to France?"

"Yeah sweetheart I am." Liv said wrapping her arms around Karen,

"I'm proud of you Liv, I really am. And I'm happy for you. I just wish you weren't going so far away." Karen said with quivering lips.

"I know sweet girl. I know. I promise every time I set foot into US soil you two will be my first phone call. And like I said before we're not measured by geography. I'll always only be a phone call away."

The news had dampened the mood and it took a third of a movie for the somberness to pass. She loved both Gerry and Karen beyond measure and her greatest frustration during the campaign was watching Mellie brush them aside as though they were just nuisances. A part of her was worried, not so much for Gerry but for Karen who struggled being under the watchful eye of America. It was hard enough to be a teenager under normal circumstances, let along having to be exposed to this generations social media capabilities. The saving grace was that she and Gerry were thick as thieves and Gerry was incredibly protective of his little sister and shielded her as much as he could.

The days passed quickly as Liv tried to get her affairs into order. In the midst of packing, and goodbyes she made sure she got to spend as much time with Gerry and Karen as she could. Olivia was grateful for Mellie's graciousness in allowing them to be with her as much as they could before she left. She realised she needed the transition period as much as they did. On the night before she was due to fly out she was having dinner with James and Cyrus. She had exhaustedly let herself into their home with her key calling out as she entered.

"I soooo need a drink after this last week so i intentionally caught a cab here. I say lets not bother waiting for Uncle Cy and his tardiness and break this baby open." Just as she got to the living room the light switch was flicked open and a room full of people jumped out screaming 'Surprise' making her jump a mile. When Liv came face to face with Cyrus she gave him a sheepish smile,

"Ooops!"

"Yeah oops, you were willingly cracking a bottle of red without me. Shame on you." He said as he hugged her hello.

"Sorry Uncle Cy, oh my gosh you did all this for me?" She said as looked around the room and saw a room full of people she loved. Gerry and Karen were even there with Mellie.

"Of course kid, couldn't see you off without a proper send off."

"Thank you," she said gratefully hugging both Cyrus and James. Olivia spent the evening working the room making sure that she got to say goodbye to everyone.

"Liv, I can't believe you're leaving. We'll so miss you." Mellie said as she hugged Olivia.

"I'll miss you guys too." She replied sincerely. She and Mellie maybe polar opposites but they shared a mutual respect for the other. If it weren't for her conflicting emotions she'd probably use the word Friend loosely to describe her relationship with Mellie. After all they had been partners in ensuring that Fitz gets his presidency.

"I have to go. I'm off to California and have to be there by morning but I didn't want to miss your farewell."

"Oh thank you. I'm so glad you came."

"The kids want to stay so I'll send the car back for them."

"Great, have a safe flight."

"You too. Keep in touch."

"I will." Olivia promised.

Olivia was rummaging through the Beene's walk in pantry looking for snacks as the canapés just weren't doing it for her anymore. The guests had left leaving only the Grant kids behind.

"Find anything good?" Olivia jumped surprised and froze as she recognized the voice. Fitz chuckled,

"Don't be so surprised. Do you really think I'd let you leave without at least saying goodbye." Olivia took a deep breath and turned around to find him standing by the door, leaning against the frame with his arms folded smiling at her. He literally took her breath away. A part of her just wanted to run over to him and throw her arms around him. She'd missed him. Time hadn't been able to diminish the longing she felt for him and looking into his eyes she knew that the feeling was mutual.

"I'm glad you did," she admitted clearing her throat she said as she watched him walk towards her. As he stood before her, only inches apart, his eyes never leaving hers she felt an overwhelming feeling of sorrow overtake her. Her eyes brimmed with tears matching his. He wanted to hold her, but knew he couldn't fearing that the moment he did he would never let her go. In that moment they were saying their goodbyes. In that moment they were both consciously releasing the other.

"Liv,"

"I know, me too. In another time and place." She said finally looking away to wipe her tears.

** don't hate me. It's not the end. OLITZ is always end game...well one usually aims for that :) hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you to those who take the time to review! Love and appreciate it! Have a great weekend! Hope the weather in your neck of the world is better than mine **


	10. Chapter 10

Being back in France was like finding your favourite old sweater after so long and putting it on to find that it still brings you that comfort of a hug from a loved one. Which came in handy as she arrived in Paris she hit the ground running. She barely had the chance to send a mass text to say she arrived as her first stop was the US Embassy to meet with Wes who arrived in Paris just the day before.

"I'm sorry I couldn't come and pick you up at the airport." Wes apologized as she walked into the US Embassy to find him leaning against the reception desk obviously waiting for her arrival.

"Don't be silly. Thank you for the car. I was just going to cab it."

"Well the car came with me, but I got called away. Your flight okay?"

"Yes, I got some sleep in. How about you? Paris treat you alright on your first day?"

"Yes, despite the chaos of moving across the seas and settling in. Probably helps that I love it here and have spent so much time here."

"Me too."

Before they knew it months had passed and Wes and Olivia had found their rhythm almost immediately. It helped that they had so many similarities. They were also close in age and shared the same work ethic.

"Come on Pope, we have worked well into the night every night since we arrived in Paris. Tonight we bail at six and go out to actually appreciate the cuisine this city offers not to mention the sights." Olivia looked up from the paperwork on her desk, eyeballed the time and grinned dropping her pen to her desk.

"I'm in! I swear I have been staring at the same page for the last thirty minutes and have gotten nowhere." She confessed

"Me too. Hence lets blow this place." He said holding her jacket up for her to get into. Olivia chuckled and didn't waste another second. After locking up their office they headed out into the Paris night for a much needed down time.

"So tell me, you were a part key part of the Grant Campaign, why didn't you stay on board? Not enough pay?" He teased,

"Exactly, minimum wage!" She answered rolling her eyes highly amused.

"Seriously! I heard through the grapevine that Communications Director was a position that remained unfilled for months. One would assume as the lead Campaign Manager they would have offered you that position,"

"They did. I just, it wasn't for me."

"Were they holding that position free in hopes to convince you eventually?"

"Cyrus was I think. Mainly because we work without a need for conversation. During work hours I get labelled the work wife, but mostly he's just Uncle Cyrus, pain in my ass but we work incredibly well together. While everyone is a little weary of Cyrus Beene, they know he doesn't scare me at all."

"You gotta admit he's scary Liv," Wes said with a shudder clearly having been at the receiving end of Cyrus' wrath at one point in his career.

"I'm not arguing that he's scary. He just doesn't scare me. Sharing DNA allows me to yell back and play the orphan card."

"Nice! So he's your uncle?" Olivia nodded and explained the family tree which was something she rarely shared with anyone else but Wes was almost family. In six months they had lived and breathed the same air in a confined space as they got him settled in his new job and his new position. Both being seemingly single allowed them to work the long hours to execute the plans they wanted to execute during his term as Ambassador.

"So what about you? I noticed when we first got here you were pretty attached to that phone of yours and lately, it doesn't ring or beep as much."

"Long distance relationships aren't for everyone." He replied sadly as he took another sip of his wine.

"They didn't want to make the move?"

"Well not when something better apparently presented themselves while they were getting packed up to move to Paris."

"Oh Coop, I'm so sorry." She said apologetically squeezing his arm.

"Ces la vie, seems appropriate." He replied with a shrug. Olivia smiled and poured him another tall glass of wine.

"Love your work Pope," he said raising his glass,

"I got your back Coop."

They were up to their second bottle of wine when her phone rang, she looked at him apologetically. She had been playing phone tag with the Grant kids for days and didn't want to miss them again,

"Six months and you forget you have friends. Not an email or a text to even say I'm alive. I think I'm hurt." Olivia closed her eyes and tried to regain her composure. They had spent the last six months getting updates on each other through here say.

"What can I say I have a demanding job," she replied while Wes laughed appreciatively in the background,

"Sorry Livi, am I catching you at a bad time. I thought you might have already been home."

"No, it's okay. Coop and I have finally broken out of our cage after six months and finally taking advantage of our location and celebrating with a whole lot of wine and good food."

"Coop?"

"Sorry, Ambassador Cooper." She explained.

"Ahh,"

"How are you? What's new?" She asked gesturing some sort of apology to Wes who waved his hand nonchalantly and picked up his phone to start scouring through his email.

"Not much. I just wanted to say hi."

"I'm glad. I keep tabs on you and I have to say I'm really proud of you."

"Thank you Livi. I feel like I'm drowning some days." He confessed as he would only to her.

"You're doing great." She assured him.

"How are you?"

"I'm good. Loving my job I have to say, and not just because I have my boss sitting in front of me." She added while Wes just smirked in response,

"You sound happy Liv,"

"I am. I really am." She replied realising that she really was.

"Good, I'm glad." He said sincerely.

"Hey I feel really rude, can we do this a little later?"

"Sure Liv, it's good to hear your voice."

"Thank you. Yours too. Take care."

"You too Liv. I miss you." Before she could reply he hung up.

"Sorry! I've been really bad at keeping in touch." She explained placing her phone back on the table.

"Old flame?"

"Hardly. Just a friend." She replied dryly.

"That could have been more?"

"Maybe in another life." She admitted with a somewhat faraway look.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, it's been a little while and somehow out of mind out of sight worked so I guess I'm just a little thrown."

"Is he the reason why you were willing to move to another country?" It was more a guess than a question. In the spirit of their camaraderie she found herself not holding back and being completely honest with him,

"Yes. We're wrong for so many reasons and it was just easier to take myself out of the equation because common sense only goes so far sometimes."

"Married?" Olivia took a deep breath, it sounded so much worse when it came out of someone else's mouth.

"Yeah. It's all cliche really. Loveless marriage. Marriage of convenience. It would have been easy to justify it, especially when you did the math, but I just couldn't do it. I didn't want to hurt his wife, his family. At the end of the day, we all deserve better."

"You obviously both love each other." He observed,

"That's the kicker really. It's truly one of those can't eat, can't sleep, over the park kind of love. When we're in the same room we gravitate towards each other despite how hard we try not to. We just get each other and bring a sense of peace to the other by our mere presence. It's once in a lifetime kind of a thing."

"And divorce isn't an option?" He asked,

"Not right now, and he has kids and really I don't want to be that girl who broke up Mom and Dad."

"Fair enough. Thank you."

"For what?" She asked confused,

"I sense you don't generally talk about this topic and whether its the alcohol or me, I appreciate it. You can trust me."

"I know. I feel it in my gut, and my gut is never wrong." She said with a grin.

For the months that followed Wes and Olivia only became closer. It was inevitable as they spent most of their time together. With their offices literally only divided by a thin wall, and living across from each other's apartment set them up pretty well for that. Though they both casually dated, their jobs kept any long term candidates at bay. Whatever little time they had off, they spent running errands, doing chores like cleaning their own apartments and laundry. Olivia had also started volunteering at a nearby orphanage with whatever little time she had. Though she was Wes' right hand person, she managed to stay out of the limelight and remain unknown and far away from cameras which was always frustrating to Fitz who was always looking to catch a glimpse of her. They had only spoken once since he had called her that first time, it was brief, but meaningful. She knew he called only when he really felt out of his depth and just needed a moment of reprieve. As it happened so rarely she never made a big deal out of it and equated it to talking a friend off their ledge. Fitz could tell that she was thriving and though he missed her. He was happy for her. She deserved a full life and truly wished that for her.

"Did you change your career to floral arranging and forgot to tell me about it?" Wes asked walking into her office noticing that numerous flower arrangements scattered around her office.

"You're hilarious!" She replied rolling her eyes at him as she looked up from the brief he had left on her desk that morning.

"So what gives?"

"Nothing,"she answered with a shrug and while covering her mouth she mumbled something so incoherent he almost missed it.

"It's your birthday!" He exclaimed.

"Why is that not on your file and why have you never answered the question when I asked?"

"To avoid this..." She said waving her hand around the room,

"And this," Olivia continued pressing play on the voicemail of her phone,

"Happy birthday Liv!" Stephen her childhood friend screamed obnoxiously into her voicemail. Followed by several others.

"You realise they wouldn't be so obnoxious if you weren't so against your own birthday." Wes pointed out,

"Yeah yeah."

"Come on, lets go. You are not spending another minute of your birthday working. Get up! We're going to lunch, on me. We're going to be drink copious amount of wine, and if you're nice we can take a ride on the ferry over the seine."

"You spoil me."

"As your self proclaimed BFF, it is my duty. Now lets go."

"Not to give you a big head but we passed self proclaimed months ago. You've officially been my BFF for months,"

"Aww thanks Pope, you know you're mine."

"Ah yes, you did pass me that note in third period." She replied teasingly as she pushed him out of her office.

"I can't believe we had to run home so you like get changed. Seriously, it's my birthday and I'm the girl in this friendship and you're the one getting changed. What you're hoping to get lucky? Seriously! I thought the aim was copious amount of wine..."

"You're welcome to change and meet me at mine if you want," Wes said exasperatedly making Liv smile,

"Thank you,"

"Lots and lots of work," he muttered rolling his eyes at her earning not so gentle smack in the arm.

"I might grab a quick shower. Meet you at yours in half an hour. Then we party." She said crossing the hall to her own door.

Half an hour later Olivia let herself into Wes' apartment with her own key as they had long since exchanged keys and declared that knocking was only for strangers.

"Yo Coop, you better be done because not only did I manage to shower, I have hair and make up done so you better be bringing it." She called out to him assuming he was still in his bedroom primping, so she headed to his darkened living room to wait for him.

"Surprise!" They all yelled making her jump a mile. There they stood, the people she loved most in the world standing in the Ambassador's living room.

"Happy birthday Liv!" Gerry and Karen said flinging their arms around her.

"Thank you. It's so good to see you. I can't believe you're really here. I've missed you both."

"We've missed you too."

"Happy Birthday Kiddo," Cyrus greeted as he stood behind the Grant kids,

"Thank you Uncle Cy,"

"I haven't missed a birthday yet and I wasn't going to start now." Olivia released the kids to hug Cyrus after almost a year of not seeing him it dawned on her just how much she missed him. He looked older to her somehow,

"I'm sorry I haven't made it back home yet."

"It's okay Kid." Cyrus said reassuringly. However Wes did it, he did a great job. He even managed to get her childhood friends Stephen, Abby, Harrison and Huck there. Wes knew she had a small circle and he managed to get them all there and for that she was extremely touched and grateful.

"Nice play with the whole pretending not to know my birthday." She said as she handed him a full glass of wine to trade with his empty one. Wes grinned,

"Award winning performance I thought,"

"You would," she teased nudging his shoulder with hers.

"Thank you for all this. For going through so much trouble."

"It wasn't all me. A huge part of it was Cyrus."

"Thank you all the same. Paris wouldn't be Paris without you Coop."

"Back at ya Pope."

"So the kids and I are heading to Disneyland either today or tomorrow if you want to joint us." Olivia had established that the kids were on holidays and if she were up for it they were wanting to hang with her or they would head over go Italy to be with one of Mellie's sisters which was not their preferred option.

"Uh like duh. Count me in. We haven't been in ages." In the rare occasions where they were off for two consecutive days they went to Disneyland. It was their favourite pastime. Wes had long since gotten them a yearly pass.

After midnight Olivia said good night to all. With the exception of the Grant kids everyone else was staying at a nearby hotel and they had all agreed to meet for before everyone had to head home.

Olivia had just set up the kids in the guest room and was on her way back to Wes' to insist on helping him clean up when she caught the figure sitting on her couch seemingly waiting for her.

"You're here." She stammered. Fitz stood to his feet,

"Happy birthday Livi." She looked amazing. However much he missed her up to that point paled in comparison to the emotion he was feeling right then.

"What are you doing here?" She asked confused,

"The summit is here this year. It's in a few days. I thought I'd leave a little early and hang in Paris beforehand.

"Did you just say hang?" Fitz smiled knowing she was about to hit panic mode,

"Calm down Liv. It's not a big deal."

"The leader of the free world is in my living room, umm yeah it's a big deal. What if someone tracks you down?"

"You're a close family friend. My kids adore you. It wouldn't be scandalous for us to be seen visiting with you and the Ambassador. Not to mention Cyrus and James are also here with us." Fitz saw her visibly relax.

"Can I get you anything?" She asked,

"How about a hug for an old friend?" He answered opening his arms out to her. Against her better judgement and her inner voice that screamed no, she found herself walking into his arms and moulding into his embrace, and it was just as she remembered. Just like an old sweater that was perfect and comfortable. At least for the first few moments.

"I miss you Liv," he murmured against her hair.

"I miss you too." She replied honestly.

"Liv we have to talk..."


	11. Chapter 11

"Liv, we have to talk." Olivia pulled back to look at him trying to gauge his mood and determine the direction their conversation was headed.

"Shall we sit?" She suggested as he nodded.

"I didn't want you to hear this over the news or grapevine." Olivia watched as he took a deep breath,

"A few months ago, I filed for divorce." Olivia gasped,

"But you can't, you're the president." She said shocked,

"There are no laws against it and lets be honest, I never should have ran as a married man. It was all a lie. It's one thing to live a lie when you don't know any better but it's another when you're not only lying to everyone else, but you're lying to yourself as well. What kind of a president leads from a place of lying. Every moment I step out with Mellie as though she is the love of my life is another moment I'm not true to myself, to the people of America, to the love of my life."

"Fitz,"

"I know you've moved on with your life and so you should have and I'm truly happy that you are happy, but I'm not doing this for you, or even for the possibility of us. I'm doing this because it is what is true. I'm not telling you this so we could run off to the sunset together, as nice as that may be in theory we both know that life isn't that simple. I'm telling you this because you're my friend and that you're the only person in this world I trust so implicitly. I wanted to tell you for the first time in my life I feel free. You always told me to go with my gut and I did and it's right."

"How are the kids taking it?" She asked surprised that neither Grant child had mentioned it.

"They're good. Relieved probably that they no longer have to contend with the constant tension between Mellie and I. I get full custody of them, which makes all parties happy. They'll spend some weekends and parts of their holidays with Mellie but we both know those two will wrangle their way out of and she won't care. We sat down as the infamous trio and I had told them that I wanted to file for divorce and asked them for their input. If they were completely opposed to it I wouldn't have gone through with it. They're my first priority. They were beyond supportive and have been completely solid since."

"How did Mellie take it?"

"Not well at first. She asked if there was someone else and I said no that we didn't need a third party to further complicate the situation we were already in. We talked over it for weeks and eventually she realised that it wasn't a whim, and it wasn't that I didn't care about her it was just that I didn't want to live in a lie anymore. She gave in and signed the papers. I promised to support and endorse her political aspirations. She seems okay. I think deep down she's equally unsatisfied with the arrangement. She deserves to live out her own life and take a stab at her own happiness."

"Wow," Olivia did not expect Mellie to be cooperative.

"I think she realises that she deserves better. So our divorce will be finally in a couple of days and we'll be making an announcement together."

"How are you doing?"

"For the most part I'm just relieved its going to be over you know. I worked hard this last year and I hope that's enough to prove that with or without a wife I am the right person for the job."

"For what's its worth. I'm proud of you. I know you didn't come to the indecision lightly."

"Thank you Livi."

"What do you need?"

"I just need to know you've there. As my friend, my closest counsel."

"Always Fitz, always." She promised.

** so I thought long and hard about this and decided that its still not yet their time. I didn't want them to just jump into it. Their time will come I promise. Sorry the chapter is short but it's been a bit of a whirlwind of a week. Hope you're having and if you're in my side of the hemisphere had a great weekend**


	12. Chapter 12

Fitz was sitting in the Oval contemplating what he had just done. Divorcing Mellie was never part of the plans that were laid out for him all those years ago. Sure they weren't in love but they had a common goal, which was his presidency. It wasn't until Olivia Pope had walked into their lives did he even think for one moment that there was more to a relationship than just a barely tolerable companionship. He knew the moment he met her, she would be his undoing without meaning to be. It made him realise that he was living a life that was a lie and not to his true potential. He needed more than a political wife, he needed a partner. He had always planned to divorce Mellie after he had moved into the White House. With or without Olivia he wanted to be honest with himself and with the people. He was glad that Olivia had taken the job with Wesley Cooper. It was a great opportunity for her and he knew it would make her happy, and at the end of the day her happiness is what he wanted. After everything they had been through, he cared about her enough to want only the best for her. In the meantime he wanted to be the man she voted for. Despite the fact that she was so far away, she was still his moral compass that he gauged many if not all of his decisions on. His thoughts were interrupted by his secretary,

"Yes Louise,"

"I have Morris from the gates sir. Apparently there is a Huck that is wanting to deliver something for you." Fitz knew Huck, he was a good friend of Olivia's and that was enough for him.

"Please tell Morris to give Huck a pass and have him come to my office."

"Yes sir,"

"Huck please come in," Fitz said waving him in as he stood from his desk.

"Liv just wanted me to deliver this for you," he said handing Fitz a small box. Curiously he opened it to find a phone. He picked it up and looked at Huck curiously.

"It's a secure phone. No one is able to track or hack into it." Fitz nodded understanding as Huck headed out. Literally moments after Huck had departed from his office the phone in his hand rang,

"Well hello there," he answered with a grin.

"The news just hit my side of the world. I thought you could use a friendly voice."

"Your timing in impeccable as always. It's been crazy here. Cy's been trying to put out fires. Mellie's gone to Santa Barbara to avoid the madness. I tried to send the kids off with her so they wouldn't have to be in the middle of this but they want to stand in solidarity."

"They love you, they want to make sure you know they have your back."

"I know and I love them for it but they already hate the spotlight, this just makes it worse."

"If you want to send them here for a little anonymity you can. Coop and I will make sure they're safe and away from paparazzi." She offered,

"Thanks Liv. In all honesty I want to send all three of us there for anonymity."

"Tough luck for you it's not so easy to be Anonymous when you're the president."

"Buzz kill Liv," Olivia laughed,

"I'm sorry. How are you holding up?"

"Good. I mean it's weird honestly and then I have poor Cyrus running around trying to put out fires around me. It was the right decision, I guess it's just seeing the mixed reaction. Having to see that people are disappointed in me." She caught the sadness in his voice,

"You said so yourself. Had you remained silent, you would be doing them a disservice. I am proud you. You would rather lead from a place of honesty than popularity. You are the man I voted for and so much more. Don't disregard and diminish the gravity of the sacrifice you were willing to make so that you were no longer lying to the American people. It seems a little as though they're swarmed around with pitchforks right now but it will die down. You just keep being you, let your children stand beside you, not for aesthetics but because you three genuinely love and support each other. Let the American people know that you are still the man who believes in family values wholeheartedly and that doesn't change because you made the choice of what would be better for your family." Fitz closed his eyes and let her words sink in,

"Thank you Livi."

"Anytime Fitz."

"So how goes Paris?" He asked changing the subject,

"Great! Working all the time but it kind of sucks less that Coop is there to make it more fun. I swear half the time I feel like we're college students with bigger dorm rooms." Fitz laughed heartily. After being privy to their exchange he knew what she was talking about. Coop was a couple of years older than Olivia and they were so similar that it was almost uncanny." It reminded Fitz that Olivia was still young and she needed to be with those around her age to be carefree and fun. He knew from her history that she had always felt more comfortable in the company of those older. He guessed it was all the time she spent with her parents and Cyrus.

"I bet,"

"How's Cy? I checked in on him a little earlier and I was pretty sure he was was breathing into a paper bag." He chuckled.

"He probably was. He's been a trooper Liv. I'm sure he wanted to kill me when I told him what I was going to do." Olivia laughed, he wasn't far off. The day after Fitz had told her Cyrus was in her living room pacing and ranting in a way that only Cyrus could.

"Uncle Cy, calm down. You're going to pop a vein or have a heart attack. Please." She said not entirely joking. Cyrus took a breath,

"We're at the White House Liv, we're here." He whined,

"And what Uncle Cy, you can't change the world because the man is receiving a little disapproval? Because he's not as perfect as you thought he was. Come on Cy, he's idealism and his principles are the very reason why you thought he was once in a lifetime. That hasn't changed Cy, if anything the fact that he would rather walk away from what is evidently a lie and be true to who he is despite the whiplash he knew he was going to get solidifies the fact that he is the right person to run the country. He is that person you always thought he was Uncle Cy, and he is." Olivia paused,

"Once in a lifetime," she repeated placing a hand on his arm. Cyrus exasperated let out a breath before dramatically collapsing on her couch.

"This is why you should be working in the White House," he muttered,

"What so I can talk you off ledges on the daily basis? Cyrus, I can do that from Paris. Anytime time of day. I told you that."

"You know that man better than anyone,"

"Uncle Cy," she pleaded.

"I'm sorry. For what it's worth, I know you're happy and I'm happy you're happy." Olivia smiled.

"Good, I'm glad. I really love it here. I mean I always have, but it's different being here as an adult and living a life here as an adult. I try to spend a couple of days at the house whenever I get a chance, which admittedly isn't as much as I'd like."

"I haven't been there since the last time we were all there," Cyrus said wistfully as they spoke of the Pope Summer home by the beach not far away from Paris.

"When you're ready, let me know and I can take you there. It's barely an hour drive."

"Next trip," he promised. Olivia shifted closer to him on the couch and looped an arm through his as she lay her head on his shoulder.

"I miss them too Uncle Cy, some days more than others. Whenever I walk that stretch of the beach I keep waiting for Dad to call me back into the house for lunch or dinner. It always breaks my heart to walk back knowing neither of them will be there when I walk through the door." Cyrus wrapped his arms around her, dropping his lips to her head knowing exactly what she meant.

"I don't say it nearly enough but i'm glad I have you kiddo and that I love you."

"Oh Uncle Cy, I know. I love you too."

"Hey Liv," Fitz said softly realising that he had lost her for a moment,

"Sorry Fitz," she replied apologetically clearing her throat.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, having Cy come to France was great. I've really missed him, but having him here did stir up a lot of memories for both of us. Memories I'm not sure we were prepared for. I know they're memories he's been running from and to be honest if it wasn't my birthday he probably would have never come to Paris." Olivia confessed.

"He loves you an awful lot."

"The feeling is more than mutual Fitz. I didn't realise just how much I missed him and worried about him till I saw him again."

"That's only natural Liv, and you know I always have an extra eye out on him for you."

"Thank you. I wouldn't trust him with anyone else but you and James, because I know that as big of a pain in the ass as he is, you love him as much as I do."

"That we do." He promised.

"Hey Liv,"

"Yeah,"

"Thank you for calling."

"You're welcome Fitz,"


	13. Chapter 13

I know I've been really slack with updates. Work has me totally overcommitted. I'm setting this story up for something I've had in mind from the very beginning so apologies if this story is going slow for you.

Surprisingly, the backlash from the announcement of Fitz divorce was minimal. Olivia kept an eye and ear out for him at all times. Once the divorce was finalized and Mellie had officially moved out of the White House Fitz began to call her regularly. They exchanged emails and the occasional text message. Their friendship had strengthened and Oivia appreciated that he wasn't pushing for anything more than what they currently had.

"So you and POTUS, how's that going?" Wes asked as he poured her another glass of wine. It was another typical Friday night in the office for them. Olivia leaned on the arm of the couch in his office as she stretched placing her feet on his lap. As her closest confidant in France, he had been privy to all of her secrets. Even the POTUS related ones that she never shared with anyone else.

"Ok I guess. I mean we're just friends."

"For now," he said with a smirk,

Olivia gave Wes' thigh a light nudge with her foot. Truth was Wes from get go wondered if the mystery man in Olivia Pope's life was indeed the POTUS, not entirely sold on her story about not wanting to work in the White House. He knew from the legends what a dynamic team it took to launch Fitzgerald Grant into his presidency. His suspicions were confirmed when the president showed up for Olivia's birthday, conveniently hiding behind the pretense of the summit. If there were any doubts, he had caught the look of longing the POTUS had on his face as his gaze followed Olivia wherever she went.

Once the divorce hit the media, he had couldn't help but wonder the divorce was executed with Liv in mind. So when she finally fessed up that he was who she bolted DC from, Wes wasn't altogether surprised. He knew despite the fact that Fitz was officially divorced and had been for months, Olivia was cautious. They had gone from emails, messages and the random phone calls to a daily check in. There were certain parts of the day where her phone would ring or beep and without a doubt it would be the POTUS. The smile that graced her face each time was also a dead give away.

"You know he is divorced Liv and has been for months to almost a year. It's no longer taboo."

"Coop, he's the POTUS. It will never not be controversial and despite what you think, he didn't leave her for me."

"Maybe not entirely, but you're not naive enough to think that you did not at all factor in the execution of his decision to finally divorce his wife despite how unhappy they were."

"Maybe I am," she countered defiantly crossing her arms making him chuckle,

"Don't insult my intelligence or yours for that matter. You love him Liv, dare I say you're in love with him. He's free, what else do you want? You are running out of excuses. You know all that man is waiting for is a go ahead and he will do everything in his power to sweep you off your feet so you can fall into his arms."

"Since when are you Team Fitz anyway?" She grumbled taking a generous sip of her wine.

"I'm team Pope, but I refuse to condone your desire to not allow real love into your life simply because you're scared. Life if too short Carrie." Olivia let out a small smile and gave him another nudge with her foot. He saved 'Carrie' for the big moments and only used them when he was trying to soften her up. Wes grinned knowing he got his point across.

"I'm scared."

"Duh," he replied simply, earning a kick to his side instead of a nudge.

"Sorry, go on." He said encouraging her to go on.

"He's had this somewhat unrealistic perception of me and what if I fall short of those expectations and..."

"You end up like Mellie?" He continued, as she gave a somewhat embarrassed nod.

"Karma's a bitch and all."

"Liv, for as long I've known the President and his wife, and it has been many years. I have never seen him look at her the way he looks at you. You breathe in sync for goodness sake. What you have, it's a once in a lifetime."

"No pressure Coop!" She said dryly as he shrugged.

"I just don't want you to deny yourself of something so rare simply because you're too chicken to take a risk. For someone so brave at everything you're pretty cowardly when it comes to your own happiness."

"Ouch, don't hold back Coop." Wes placed a hand on her knee,

"Seriously Car, take a leap. If you fall flat on your face at least you can say you took a chance. I don't want you to live a life of what if's and regrets."

"I hear you. I do, and if or when the time comes I will be brave. I promise."

"I'll hold you to that."

"I know, that's why I'm saying it." It had take a few months after working together before Wes had told her about his long term partner and love of his life Gab. They had been together right from the first year of college, and he was killed in a car accident only a few years before. Though he eventually found someone he cared enough about to actually start a new life with, the hole that was left behind was too big for anyone to fill. Olivia knew that Wes believed in that one great love, and he believed that Gab was his.

"You know not to throw ones word back at them, you need to take chances too. You need to allow yourself to care about someone who may just surpass your love for Gab. To not be afraid of that possibility. I'm sure Gab would only want you to be happy.

"I know. One day. Let's remember that I did take that plunge just before coming here and got screwed."

"It just means that Asshat wasn't meant for you. That you deserved better."

"Thanks Liv,"

"We'll you know I'm always Team Coop!"

"Always good to hear."

With holidays fast approaching and both Olivia and Wes off for the duration, Olivia had opted to go home to DC. Keeping her plans under wraps just in case she had to stay behind, no one was expecting her home for the holidays.

Olivia wanted to surprise Cyrus as she hadn't seen him since she came home for their new daughter Ella's christening. She was looking forward to spending some quality time with them, as well as the Grant's knowing that Mellie was away traveling with friends. Fitz had full custody of Gerry and Karen, though he had offered for the kids to be with her at least part of the holidays, she wasn't at all interested. It made Olivia mad when Fitz had told her, but he wasn't at all surprised by her decision or by the behavior.

"Hey Cy, I've been trying to reach Liv all day and I keep getting voicemail. Have you heard from her at all today?" Fitz asked as he walked into Cyrus' office.

"Awww, I'm so touched you care so much." A voice behind him teased. Fitz spun around to see Olivia sitting on the couch in Cyrus' office scrolling through her emails.

"You're here!."

exclaimed strolling over to her to hug her hello.

"Mr President,"

"Why didn't you mention you were coming? Are you here for the holidays?"

"I wasn't sure if I could pull it off. I left poor Coop on his own in Paris. He and I were meant to make the trip home together and we had a last minute emergency and he literally shoved me on the plane before I decided to stay behind too."

"I'm glad, it's so good to see you Liv." He said giving her another hug.

"You too. Where are the kids? I want to see them. I have their Christmas presents," she said pointing to a small suitcase in the corner beside her normal suitcase.

"Please don't tell me that's all for my kids Liv? Like you don't spoil them enough."

"Errr no, Ella's is in there too." She answered sheepishly.

"And you can't talk, I know you're just as bad with her as I am." Fitz chuckled. She got him and they both knew it. She knew that he was an avid online shopper, she was often on the receiving end of it, as his children were and Ella was quickly added to the equation the moment she became Cyrus Rutherford Beene's daughter, and if possible even more so after he was deemed her Godfather.

"Godparents prerogative!" They both said in unison. Before either of them could move to another topic Cyrus walked into his office.

"There's a party in my office and I wasn't invited?"

"Uncle Cy!" Liv exclaimed excitedly bouncing over to where he was and wrapped her arms around him.

"Livvie, I'm so happy to see you."

"I've missed you Uncle Cyrus,"

"And I you kid." He replied giving her another brief squeeze.

"You okay Uncle Cy? You're looking a little tired."

"I'm fine honey." Olivia raised an eyebrow suspiciously. He hadn't called her honey since she was in high school. Cyrus glanced at Fitz somewhat nervously,

"What's going on here?" She asked growing worried looking from one to the other.

"Nothing Liv, I'm just coming down with something. Really Liv, please don't worry," Liv wasn't buying it and they knew it. She was about to demand that they confess whatever they were hiding when Cyrus' secretary came into the room,

"Mr President and and Mr Beene, they're ready for you in the situation room. Hey Liv, how'd you get past me?" Olivia grinned and gave Nancy an affectionate hug hello.

"You weren't there when I got in,"

"We better go. Liv the kids are in the residence go on up if you'd like and Cy and I will catch up. Where are you staying? You're welcome to stay one of the guestrooms if you'd like,"

"I was sort of hoping to crash at the Beene Residence so I can hang with Ella," she said looking at Cy who was looking very non committal.

"But I guess not." She said a little hurt.

"I'll go see the kids and head off. You two are obviously busy." Without waiting for a reply from either of them she turned and walked out of Cyrus' office.

"Liv..." Cy called out as she stormed down the hallway.

"What!" She replied as she turned to face him,

"I'm sorry kiddo. Of course you can stay with us. James will be so excited you're home and Ella's starting to babble and whenever she sees your photo she points and says 'Lib' its adorable."

"What's with all the weirdness Uncle Cy?"

"I'll fill you in tonight, I promise."

"Fine," she said with a shrug. Cyrus draped an arm over her shoulder and dropped his lips to her temple.

"I'm really glad you're home kiddo, I've really missed you."

"Me too," she replied wrapping her arms around his waist giving him a brief squeeze,

"I'll be at the residence, come and get me when you're ready to go." Cyrus nodded in acknowledgement as she headed towards the residence.


	14. Chapter 14

Fitz found Olivia in the middle of a dance off with Gerry on the XBox Kinnect. He watched them for awhile unbeknownst to the three of them. It wasnt until they had finished that Fitz made his presence known by clapping. Olivia froze suddenly conscious and a little embarrassed.

"Oh my word Olivia Pope, who would have thought the word 'chillin' was in your vocabulary." Fitz teased.

"Very funny Mr President, and really chillin' was the best word you could come up with? What a waste of a really high verbal score on your SAT's Fitzgerald." She threw back good naturedly as the kids laughed appreciatively.

"So I convinced Cy to let the Grant's kidnap you for the night, and let me tell you it was no easy feat. There was definitely rank being pulled."

"Nicely done. Are you sure this is a good idea?" She asked, ever the fixer. Fitz chuckled.

"Seriously Liv, you pass as their friends not mine."

"Well duh, that's because I am." She quipped without a moments thought.

"Ouch! You cut me Liv."

"That was an awesome upper cut Liv." Gerry said draping an arm around her shoulder.

"It's okay daddy, Gerry and I can share."

"You are all, I don't even have words."

"Again, wasted high score."

"Is that right?" He asked with a twinkle in his eye and before Liv could dodge him he had picked her up and thrown her over his shoulder.

"Did we tell you about the indoor pool? You should really check it out."

"Don't you dare Fitzgerald!" She shrieked knowing that he wouldnt think twice about throwing her in the pool. Gerry and Karen followed close behind as they went through the private residence. When they entered the poolhouse Olivia's eyes widened,

"Don't forget I have loads of dirt on you. I have access to photos from your frat days." She threatened making Fitz laugh,

"We both know you would never tarnish my political image."

"Fine, if you want to play dirty." She lowered her voice so that only he could hear her. Fitz stopped in his tracks and immediately put her down. Olivia chuckled,

"I thought you'd see it my way." She said smugly as she gave him a playful shove.

"You so don't play fair Livi." Fitz declared with a pout.

"So what's for dinner Dad?" Gerry asked beyond amused,

"I thought in honor of Liv we do Mexican night." He answered knowing Liv loved Mexican.

"You're cooking tonight?" She asked incredulously,

"It's Friday night, Dad always cooks on a Friday night when we're home and he's not working back or in some meeting."

"Still?" She asked knowing it was Grant tradition before he was president.

"It's tradition. Come on let's go. Maria already has everything out. Kare why don't you and Liv handle the tortillas tonight while Gerry and I get everything else set up. You can teach live how to make them." Fitz replied.

"Oooh that sounds fun. Let me raid your pantry and make dessert, though it wouldn't be remotely Mexican." She warned,

"Liv please make your brownies." Gerry pleaded

"Ahh the famous brownies I have yet to taste."

"Well it looks like you finally will tonight."

The night was fun filled between cooking snd baking together to more dance off's this time with Fitz joining them. Olivia couldnt help but marvel at how great he was at being a Dad. Whenever he was around his kids he was never the president, he was always just Dad. They truly brought out the best in him and vice versa. She felt lucky to be privy to it all. At midnight while they watched a movie in the entertainment room both Gerry and Karen had fallen asleep. Fitz got up and grabbed a couple of blankets from the closet and covered them both tucking the blanket under their chin planting a kiss on both of their foreheads. He sat back down beside Olivia and draped a blanket over them both.

"Welcome to the Grant's house of madness." he said with a grin,

"Funnest place on earth. Thanks for having me over."

"Of course. I'm really glad you decided to stay. It is nice to have you around again Liv. I miss you all the time but I never realise just how much till we're in the same room. Thanks for being there this past year, with the divorce, and being there for the kids. For me. I don't think we would have gotten through it without you."

"What are friends for right?" She said placinga hand over his giving it a squeeze.

"For the record I miss you too. All of you." She said as she looked at his kids fast asleep. It meant the world to him that cared so deeply for his children and genuinely loved them. The feeling was more than mutual.

"Liv," he said softly,

"Yeah," Olivia replied turning her gaze from the kids to look at him. Fitz tucked a loose hair behind her ear and kept his hand on her cheek,

"Earlier when we were horsing around you said if I didn't put you down you would stop considering the idea of dating me. Does that mean, I mean do yiu still feel, I guess what im trying to say..."

"You seriously got a higher score on verbal?" She teased as she grinned at him making him blush,

"Yes I still feel the same way and yes I have thought about it. I just dont want to rush into it. The truth is everything I ran away from from is still so prominently there. You're still Fitz who makes my heart thump so fast, my friend, my confidant, someone I care about so deeply and yes love." Fitz lit up and caressed her face holding it with this palm

"I am hopelessly inlove with you. I have been from the first time we met." He moved close to her, his facece hovering extremly close to hers. With locked eyes they both leaned forward. When his lips on touched hers it was as though he had been sitting in the dark and all of a sudden there was light. It brought a sense of peace abd belonging he had never felt before and he was glad he waited for it was worth the wait.


	15. Chapter 15

Olivia woke up in Fitz's arms the following morning. She wasn't quite sure at what point they had fallen asleep. After they shared their first kiss they had stayed up talking for a little longer before they both fell asleep.

"I've dreamed of waking up to you from that first moment I met you." He said softly as he ran his fingers along her cheek. Olivia smiled up at him,

"Such sweet talk so early in the morning." Fitz kissed the top of her nose.

"What would you like for breakfast?"

"What you're cooking breakfast too? This is a fine establishment." She teased. Fitz tightened his arms around her and for a moment they just enjoyed being in each other's arms.

"Why don't we make breakfast together?" She suggested standing to her feet holding a hand out to him.

"Sounds like a plan." As they passed the kids on the floor Olivia brought their blankets up to their chins before dropping a kiss on each of their heads.

"They look so sweet and angelic when they're asleep don't they?" Fitz said with a smirk.

"You don't fool me. I know you think the world revolves around them."

"You try telling them it doesn't." He replied good naturedly.

"Whatever you say Mr President. So how about some waffles?" She said finding a waffle griddle.

"Sounds great. I'll grab the flour and other dry ingredients if you want to grab the milk and eggs."

"Done. Can you point me towards the coffee?"

"I got it." Fitz said flicking the coffee machine on as he passed it.

"The chef must love you," Olivia observed somewhat sarcastically as he pulled everything they could possibly need from the pantry.

"Yeah let's just say he feels somewhat underused certain parts of the week when I completely take over his kitchen." Olivia loved that he was so domesticated.

"So am I allowed to ask you what's up with Uncle Cy?" She asked as she stirred the batter he put together. Fitz stopped what he was doing and looked up at her,

"He wants to talk to you himself. He asked to."

"Fine," she said with a sigh.

"What's for breakfast and what are we doing today?" Gerry enquired with a yawn as he and Karen entered the kitchen.

"Waffles and Fruit, as for today its up to you guys. Liv is expected at the Beene's for lunch so you have her till then. But they will all be back tonight for Christmas eve dinner and midnight mass. The Beene's and Liv are spending Christmas with us."

"Yay!" Karen said enthusiastically.

"Speaking of Christmas traditions, I have something for you guys," Olivia said wiping her hands with the hand towel to grab something from her room. When she came back ten minutes later with three wrapped packages she saw that Fitz had served up breakfast and they were just waiting for her.

"We thought we had to send out a search party for you." Fitz teased,

"You almost had to." She admitted handing them a package each,

"Open them. They're not Christmas presents per se but you'll get the jist. Open please." Fitz, Gerry and Karen looked at each other and grinned before ripping apart the wrapping,

"Oh awesome!" Karen exclaimed as she pulled out onesie Christmas pj's for adults. The design was Care Bears Christmas.

"Please tell me mine didn't come with feet like hers." Gerry pleaded as he pulled out his pj's with Sponge Bob Christmas all over it. He sighed with relief when he found that his was the traditional two piece pajamas.

"Thanks Liv, I love it."

"Should I be scared?" Fitz asked. As he pulled his Thunderbird's Christmas pj's out he grinned with pure excitement,

"How did you even find this? It's amazing."

"Online, I found a great website. I got one for Cy, James and Ella. Figured it'd make a great Christmas photo for Christmas morning."

"They're great. Thank you." He said planting a kiss on her cheek.

"You're welcome. Let's eat."

Fitz had arranged for a car to take Liv to the Beene's and after spending the morning lounging in the pool with them. It scared her a little just how easy it was to fall into their step knowing that when the holidays were over she'd have to leave them again.

"Call me later." He said dropping his lips to her forehead. Olivia looked up and nodded. She gave his middle a brief squeeze. Fitz bent his head closing her lips with his.

"Bye sweetheart." He murmured,

"Bye,"

Olivia stood in front of the Beene's home for a moment not ringing the bell or using her keys. Something told her that she needed to prepare herself for what was waiting for her on the other side. Having worked herself into a frenzy in the car she wasn't quite sure she was ready for what he had to tell her. She took a breath and sat on the steps trying to gain some semblance of composure knowing she would need it. So lost in her thoughts she didn't hear the door open. It wasn't until Cy sat beside her did she become aware that she was no longer alone.

"Hey Kid," he greeted dropping a kiss on her temple.

"So how bad is it?" She asked not looking at him.

"The triple bypass kind of bad." Olivia's eyes welled up with tears. Cy pulled her into his arms and held her close and tight.

"When did you find out?"

"A little while ago. At first they put me on medication hoping that would kick in so I didn't have to have surgery but it seems the meds and my line of work just doesn't quite mesh."

"You should have told me."

"And what have you fly home to worry and fuss over me. Ah no. You love Paris, you love your job."

"I love you more than Paris and more than my job. You're the only family I have Uncle Cy. It's unfair for you to make decisions for me like it's not going to affect me. I never got to say goodbye to them. What if something happened to you and I wasn't here? I couldn't bare that." She said in a whisper.

"You're here now, that's all that matters." He said hugging her tighter.

"Liv I'll be okay." He promised trying to give her some assurance.

Despite the somberness that the news brought the four of them had a nice family lunch together. Liv could see just how worried James was about Cyrus and felt for him. She took Ella for a little stroll in her pram to give Cy and James some time alone.

"Hey Coop," she answered as her phone rang.

"What's up?" Olivia sighed and began to tell him.

"Carrie stay in DC. I can hold the fort here for awhile. You need to be there."

"I miss you." She said with a defeated sigh.

"I miss you too. So anything happen with you and POTUS yet?" Olivia laughed,

"How long have you been holding that in?"

"Since I put you on a plane. Now dish, one has to live vicariously through you." Olivia filled him in on dinner the night before and staying over.

"Wow that's a first kiss worthy to be put in a box to show your grandkids one day."

"It totally was."

Talking to Coop made her feel so much better. His insistence to stay in DC made her feel better about not returning to Paris just yet. Cyrus' operation was scheduled for the fourth of January. He'd be in hospital recovering for about a week and they predicted rehabilitation would take a few months. She knew Cyrus would never let her put her life on hold indefinitely but she couldn't imagine being so far away.

"Hey sweetheart, you doing okay?" Fitz asked as she arrived with the rest of the Beene's. She gave him a brief nod and kissed his cheek. Olivia took Ella from James who practically leapt into Olivia's arms.

"She sure loves you." James stated with a smile,

"What's not to love?" She asked grinning and she held Ella up and kissed her stomach making her laugh. Ella reached for Fitz not long after,

"Oh I get it. It's not me I was just the draw bridge to get you to where you wanted to be." Olivia said in mock hurt tone of voice making the rest of them laugh.

"That's not true is it princess? You love Livi, you just love Fitzy more." He teased earning a hard whack on his arm.

"Oww, no violence in front of the children please."

"You two please stop corrupting our child." Fitz and Olivia grinned at each other and turned to Cy sheepishly,

"Sorry."

Before getting ready for dinner Fitz knocked on Olivia's bedroom door. He took one look at her and pulled her into his arms.

"Hey hey."

"I can't lose him Fitz. He's the only family I have left."

"Liv this is Cyrus we're talking about. He's going to be alright. There is no way he'd leave you, Ella or James." Olivia buried her face into his chest tightening her grip around him. Fitz tipped her chin up to look at him,

"You're not alone in this. I'm here, we're all here for you."

"Thank you." She said playing with the soft curls on the back of his neck as she looked at him. Fitz kissed her on the forehead and then on the lips. Fitz sat down on the arm chair pulling her into his lap. She curled up against him laying her head on his shoulder as she continued to play with the curls on the back of his head.

"I'm so glad I have you." She said softly looking up at him. Gently she pulled his face to meet hers and kissed him. From gentle kisses to passsionate need their eyes held each other's gaze. Olivia's phone interrupted them,

"That's my alarm to start getting ready." She said regretfully leaning her forehead against his breathless.

"I probably should too." He said with a frustrated sigh. Olivia gave him a brief kiss on the lips before hopping off his lap to shut off the alarm.

"Thank you for coming to check on me." She said wrapoing her amrs around his middle as he stood to his feet.

"Anytime. I'll see you at dinner sweetheart." He replied kissing her on the head as he returned her hug.

"Bye Baby," she murmured into his chest making him grin.

"Bye."

**** Apologies for the somewhat delayed updates. I've been off with Respiratory Infection all week and goofed up in meds. Hope you enjoy this chapter *****


	16. Chapter 16

Despite the internal somberness they felt from Cyrus' news everyone had made extra effort in not dwelling or being outwardly concerned knowing they would have plenty of time for that. Fitz had kept a discreet eye on Olivia all night knowing how worried she was about Cyrus. Olivia was standing in the kitchen waiting for the popcorn to finish completely lost in her thoughts when he found her. Fitz slipped his arms gently around her snapping her out of trance. Olivia smiled as she looked up at him intertwining her fingers with his as his hands rests comfortably against her stomach.

"Hey, are the natives getting restless?" She asked realising that she had been gone for a little while. Fitz shook his head,

"No, Ella has them as captivated audience." Liv chuckled,

"She does have that power."

"Just like her Godmother." Olivia rolled her eyes

"Over you maybe," she teased turning to face him acutely aware that his grip on her only loosened momentarily before he pulled her closer to him,

"Over me completely. No maybe about it." He confessed making her smile,

"Well Mr President the feeling has always been mutual. I just have a better poker face than you ever did." She teased giving his middle a brief squeeze. She rests her head against his chest comfortably as though it was where she always belonged,

"I knew something wasn't right when you guys came for my birthday."

"He hadn't been feeling very well weeks before that and we had finally gotten him to agree to see a doctor when we returned."

"Stubborn old mule." She muttered,

"Who are you calling old?" Cyrus feigning offense as he entered the kitchen.

"You are old man." Olivia said pointedly stepping out of Fitz's embrace to check on the popcorn that finally finished.

"Listen Liv, there's something else I wanted to talk to you about." Fitz looked over at Cy and shook his head.

"What are you going to tell me I'm adopted?" She asked dryly.

"Funny little girl." Cyrus replied.

"Am I right to assume that you have no intention of resuming your life in France until I am back in the White House?"

"Don't even try and fight me," she warned.

"As if I ever stood a chance. You are your mother's daughter. That face," Cyrus said with a shake of his head making her smile.

"I've already spoken to Coop and he said to take as long as I need to. If there's anything major he needs me for I can always fly back but day to day stuff we can do via Skype."

"I have a favour to ask you,"

"Cy, no. It's okay." Fitz said finally interrupting making Liv look from one to the other suspiciously.

"I want you to sit in my place as Chief of Staff. Fitz is going to need a right hand person that he trusts and will keep him in line. You and I both know you have always been better at doing both." Olivia looked at them both shocked. She understood the question and she more than understood the reason behind it. It made sense, but at the same time it scared her that Cyrus was sicker than he was saying he was if he was working on a plan already.

"Liv, you don't have to do this?" Fitz assured her,

"You don't want me to do it?" She asked surprised assuming he'd be all for it.

"Of course I do, but you're staying in DC for Cy, not to help me run the country. As much as I would love it. I'll manage." Olivia looked over at Cyrus who didn't quite buy Fitz's reassurances.

"Fitz, can you give us a minute?" She asked handing him the bowls of popcorn. Fitz nodded and dropped a kiss on her forehead before leaving them alone.

"He needs someone he trusts to be his counsel Liv. Let's face it you would be doing it unofficially anyway."

"Then why is it so important to you that we do it officially?"

"Because you got that man his presidency and you should be able to take your place and show the world that you were more than just his campaign manager. You made that man Liv."

"No Cy, he made himself. Yes who he surrounds himself with has a lot to do with that, but he got to where he is today because of the choices he made and because of who he is. I don't take credit for that. Do I love him more than I ever imagined I could love a person outside Mom, Dad and You absolutely. Do I support his vision, of course but his heart for this country and for those he cares about is him all on his own. So please, tell me why this is so imortant to you."

"Because I'm scared that I won't make it out of this kid." He confessed though Liv already guessed as much. He was trying to get his affairs in order. He knew his allowing her to stay in DC without much of a fight meant he was scared and that he wanted her to be nearby. Olivia crossed the room and wrapped her arms around him.

"You will Uncle Cy. I feel it in my gut, and you know my gut,"

"Is never wrong." He finished returning her hug.

"Will you please just do this for me?"

"Only under the condition that you are going to fight to resume your place beside him as his Chief of Staff, because that is your job. That you're going to fight to make sure that if I ever get married you're going to be the one to walk me down that aisle. That you will be at the birth of my children who will be your grandchildren. That you'll fight to see Ella graduate from high school and college."

"You know by the time she gets married I'll be rolling beside her on my wheelchair." He teased,

"Then wheelchair it is. Promise me." Liv learned very early on that Cyrus never made promises he couldn't keep, therefore when he did it was set on stone.

"Kid,"

"I need you to promise me Uncle Cy because I can't do any of this without you."

"Sweetheart you know that you don't need me to do anything."

"I don't want to." She said determinedly. Cyrus sighed knowing he was partially responsible for her stubborness.

"Okay, okay I promise." He relented.

"Thank you.

Olivia and Cyrus joined the rest of them a little while later in the entertainment room where they were all watching The Sound of Music which was an all time favourite for all and a Fitz, Gerry and Karen Christmas eve tradition. Olivia sat between Karen and Gerry on the couch. Karen leaned her head against Olivia who wrapped an arm around Karen as she snuggled into her. Ella crawled from where she sat in James' lap on to hers making the rest of the adults chuckle.

Olivia was the first ready for Midnight mass and took the opportunity to take a walk down to the Rose Garden to clear her mind. She wasn't at all surprised when Fitz appeared a few minutes later. They sat in companionable silence for a little while before she spoke.

"If you're okay with it, I told him I'd do it."

"I'm more than okay with it. I just didn't want you to worry about keeping me in line while you're already worrying about Cyrus."

"It'll probably make me less neurotic having something else to worry about. You know if I'm going to be your Chief of Staff..."

"It may not be the time to flaunt you around as the President's girlfriend." He said somewhat frustrated making her glance up at him apologetically.

"I don't like the idea of hiding you Liv. That's why we waited till after the divorce."

"I know. I don't like this anymore than you do. At least we'll be together all the time." She bargained.

"I guess, but I am not going out of my way to pretend that you don't mean the world to me. Let the people read into it what they will. I won't hide how I feel and the moment Cyrus is back in the office I am taking you to the press room and kissing you in front of the whole nation." Liv grinned and kissed him.

"You're cute when you're throwing your dummies out of the cot."


	17. Chapter 17

Olivia was pacing in the private waiting room at James Maddison Hospital. They had taken Cyrus in early that morning. The doctors had warned them that the surgery could take up to ten hours. After Cy had finally gone into surgery, Olivia and Fitz headed back to the White House to do some work. She and Fitz went through his schedule and sorted out a few things in his agenda. They had made the announcement right after the New Year that due to Cy's health and upcoming surgery that she Olivia Pope who was a prominent part of the Grant Campaign and Cyrus Beene's right hand person was stepping in his place till his return taking some time off from being the Ambassador of the US in France's second in command.

Olivia had sent James home after a few hours to be with Ella. She promised to keep him in the loop but knew that James wasn't coping very well with being in the hospital and that Ella would be a great distraction for him. While she was alone at the hospital she had set up a mini office so she could work while she waited for news. After three thirty that afternoon Karen and Gerry arrived with afternoon snacks.

"Hey, what are you two doing here?" She asked hugging them hello,  
"We thought we'd keep you company."  
"Thank you guys. How was school? Wait, does your Dad know where you are?" Gerry and Karen smirked,  
"Yeah, he had the chef put together snacks for us. He said he'll follow a little later to check on Uncle Cy." Gerry answered.  
"Hey Liv, can you read through my English paper before I hand it in tomorrow?"  
"Sure Kare, did you bring it with you?" Karen nodded and fished through her backpack for it and handed it to Liv.  
"How about you slugger? You got homework?"  
"Sadly yes," Gerry replied pulling out his own work from his backpack.  
"Let's eat first and you can tell me about your day first before we all start doing homework."

Fitz found all three of them working in Liv's makeshift office. Liv was running through Karen's English paper whilst answering random questions Gerry had about his homework.

"I like this part Kare, it's informative and concise but what do you think about putting it after your introduction instead of just before your conclusion?" Liv asked. Karen read through her paper carefully and nodded,  
"Oh my gosh it reads so much better. I was stuck on how I could change it and thank you Liv." Karen said gratefully throwing her arms around in Liv in appreciation.  
"Happy I could help. Your paper is great kiddo. You are an awesome writer. You have such a gift in putting your thoughts into paper. We'll have you writing your Dad's speeches in no time."  
"A little nepotism is good for the soul." Fitz declared as he walked in. The three of them looked up and smiled not realising he had arrived. Both kids rose from where they sat to greet him with a hug hello.  
"Hey, any news?" He asked Olivia cheek hello.  
"One of the nurses came in a little while ago saying he's hanging in there and that the doctor will be out as soon as he's done but not to panic because it might not be for a couple more hours."  
"Is that because the surgery was delayed?" Olivia nodded. An emergency that morning had held up Cyrus' surgeon therefore he didn't get to go into surgery till almost ten o'clock. He draped an arm around her shoulder as she instinctively wrapped her arms around his middle allowing him to pull her close and tight. Fitz knew that she was incredibly worried about Cyrus and just wanted to offer her as much comfort as he could.  
"Dad can we go get ice cream?" Karen asked standing to her feet in triumph as she finished her final draft handing it to Liv for one last look.  
"Sure go ahead. Take Tom with you." He answered handing her his wallet.  
"Thanks Dad." They chorused closing the door behind them. Fitz stood to his feet and twisted the line of for the blinds to close it while Liv read through Karen's final draft. He walked over to her and placed a hand on her shoulder. Startled she looked up at him curiously. He held out his hand to her and seconds later she was engulfed in his arms. Sighing in deep content she breathed him in.  
"Better?" He murmured. Liv looked up and smiled nodding.  
"Much, thank you. It's just all this waiting. Thank you for being here. For sending the kids earlier. For just being you."  
"Always, and for the record they came here on their own accord."  
"They're pretty awesome kids. I do love them."  
"The feeling is more than mutual." Fitz replied with a chuckle.

In the short couple of weeks that Liv had been in DC they had all grown accustomed to having her back. In more ways than one it was as though she had never left, more to the point that she had always been a part of their family. On their first day back to school Olivia had replaced their car detail with her SUV picking them up herself secret service light and took them out for the afternoon. Her mere constant presence in their life made a difference in not only in his children, but on Fitz too. There was something about having her nearby and on hand that settled them, it settled her too. She appreciated that there was no real need for them to hide their relationship. Due to her filling in for Cyrus discretion was cautionary but not altogether vital. Truth was the four of them instinctively molded into a family without much effort. It had the potential to freak her out, but it didn't. With everything that was happening with Cyrus, it was hard not to live for the moment and grab each opportunity by the shoulders and just hang on.

"Mom called." Karen said pulling her phone out of her back pocket to show her brother. Gerry nodded and pulled his phone out  
"Yep, me too."  
"I guess we should call her back?" Karen said uncertainly. They hadn't spoken to Mellie since before she left to travel with her friends. She hadn't even called them during Christmas and New Year, though they weren't all together surprised it still stung that she cared so little about them.  
"Later?" he asked,  
"I'm good with that." Karen answered with a small smile.  
"Hey Kare"  
"It's okay Ger, I'm okay. I have you and I have Dad. That's all I need." She said with a shrug trying to reassure him, but Gerry knew better. As a girl she sought the love and affection of her mother, it sadly never came. Though they both knew to some degree Mellie cared, it wasn't enough. That she didn't care the way a mother should for their child. Not the way their Dad did.  
"You know who else you have, who we all have?" Gerry asked crouching down to meet her eyes.  
"Who?"  
"Liv," Karen nodded.  
"Hey Ger,"  
"Yeah Squirt,"  
"Do you think it's bad that I think I love Liv more than I love Mom?" Karen asked somewhat tearfully. Gerry pulled Karen into his arms and hugged her tightly.  
"Oh Bug, I'm not sure if I'm the right person to ask that question because I am on the same boat. I'd like to say that there's nothing wrong with it. Liv has spent more time with us in such a short time that all the years we had with Mom. She loved us well before she and Dad even got together. She does so much for us not because she feels like she has to, but because she wants to. She knows us because she took the time to get to know us. I think its okay."  
"Hey Ger,"  
"Yeah Bug,"  
"I'm really glad I have you." She murmured tightening her arms around his waist.  
"Me too."

When the kids got back to the room Fitz and Olivia were working on his speech for an upcoming event. Liv looked up and suddenly felt that there was a shift in mood. She threw Gerry a questioning glance. He gave her a nod and subtly cocked his head to the side in Karen's direction as if to confirm that something was up.

"Hey Kare, your paper is perfect and if you don't get an A+ for it I'm going down to your school and question your teacher's credentials." Karen grinned at Olivia,  
"Thanks Liv,"  
"I need to stretch for a bit, I might go for a walk. Kare, if you're all done, you want to keep me company?" Karen nodded,  
"Yeah, I'm all done." Olivia draped an arm around her shoulder as they walked out of the room.  
"What's going on with Kare?" Fitz asked worriedly. Ger handed Fitz his phone to show him the missed calls from Mellie.  
"It's about a week too late seeing as Christmas was over a week ago. You know Kare, Mom's a sore topic. She always tries so hard with her, and she thinks that there's something wrong with her because Mom doesn't love her the way she thinks she should. The way you love us, the way Liv loves us."

Olivia and Karen walked in a comfortable and companionable silence. Liv looped an arm through Karen's and kissed her temple. Karen's eyes filled with tears and she stopped walking. Olivia wrapped her arms around her and soothingly ran her fingers through Karen's hair as she gave her a moment.

"My Mom called,"  
"Oh sweetheart. That's a good thing. I know you've been waiting for her to call. I know you miss her." Inwardly Olivia felt as frustrated as Fitz did when it came to Mellie.  
"I thought she would call at Christmas Liv. It was our first Christmas without her."  
"Honey, it might have been really hard for her. It probably made her sad that she wasn't with you for the holidays, and I wouldn't blame her."  
"Do you really think so Liv?" Liv paused and chose her words carefully,  
"If I was lucky enough to be your Mom, it would break my heart not to be a part of your every day life, especially the holidays."  
"I guess I should call her back. Thanks Liv."  
"Any time honey. I'll give you some privacy to call her back." Liv gave her another brief and meaningful hug before releasing her. Just as she was about to walk away Karen grabbed her hand.  
"Will you please stay with me?"  
"Of course sweetheart." Karen pulled her phone out with one hand and called her mother without releasing Liv's hand in hers. Liv pointed to the bench for them to sit down and Karen nodded.

"Hey Mom," Karen greeted as she and Karen sat.  
"Hi Darling. How are you?" Mellie greeted.  
"I'm good thank you. How are you? Did you have a good Christmas?" Olivia held her breath and prayed that Mellie would provide the answers that Karen needed and longed for.  
"Yes, Mrs Richmond, Mrs Vandervilt and I had a great holiday."  
"I'm glad you had a good holiday Mom. I missed you for Christmas."  
"How are Gerry, and your father?" Liv watched as Karen's face faltered and draped an arm around her shoulder.  
"Ger and Dad are fine. We're at the hospital. Uncle Cy went in for his surgery this morning."  
"Well you give them my love. I'll call you soon."  
"Sure Mom, bye." Karen said hanging up not bothering to wait for a reply.  
"I'm sorry honey." Liv apologized softly.  
"It's okay Liv. At the end of the day, did I really expect her to be any different?" As she uttered the words it broke Liv's heart as she watched Karen lose her innocence and blind faith. All of a sudden she was forced to grow up and face painful truths.  
"Liv,"  
"Yes sweetheart?"  
"What was your Mom like?" Liv smiled as she looked out for a moment as she remembered her mother.  
"She was great. She was beautiful, smart and entirely loving. I was the only child so I got to spend a lot of time with her. We used to have mother daughter dates at least once a week where we would do something girly together just us. She used to spend the afternoons helping me with my homework and then we would make dinner together."  
"She didn't work?"  
"Not till I was in primary school, and even then it was part time. She made sure she got to be there to get me ready for school, and be there when I got home."  
"She sounds great."  
"She was. You know, she would have loved you. You remind me of her. You have this amazing heart, you're so compassionate and you love so uninhibitedly. I always admired her ability to love so unconditionally. Like you do, like your Dad does."  
"I wish I could have met her."  
"Me too. Shall we head back and check on Uncle Cyrus?" Karen nodded.  
"Did I ever tell you that Uncle Cyrus and my Mom were cousins?" Liv said as they walked back into the hospital.  
"Really?"  
"Yeah, they were like two peas in a pod. My Mom thought Uncle Cy hung the moon and the stars."  
"Like you do." Karen teased while Olivia gave a guilty laugh,  
"That is true."

By the time they were back in the room, the cloud had passed, and Karen was back to her normal self. James had also come back with Baby Ella. Olivia smiled as Fitz help Ella up in the air and blew rasberries into her tummy making her laugh. As soon as Liv walked into the room Ella gurgled and reached out for her.

"Hello Sweetpea." Olivia greeted taking her from Fitz bringing Ella to her chest and holding her close as she rocked and patted.  
"Doctor come in yet?" she asked.  
"Not yet. Soon I'm sure." Fitz assured her. Olivia nodded and kissed James hello. Just as she did the doors opened and the Doctor emerged. With bated breath Fitz, Olivia and James met him by the door.

"He made it through surgery. The next twenty four to forty eight hours are critical, and it will be a long road to recovery, after that, but that Cyrus Beene is stubborn, and it came in handy." All the adults in the room grinned knowingly. Olivia hugged James tightly.  
"He's going to be alright." She said relieved.  
"Yeah kiddo, he's going to be just fine."

After dinner that night Olivia insisted on taking the first shift. James had promised to relieve her early the following morning so that she could get a few hours of work in. She promised to call as soon as Cyrus woke up. Unbeknownst to James, Cyrus had made Liv promise to make sure that James didn't spend too much time at the hospital knowing how much he hated being there.

"Call if you need anything and try to get as much rest as you can. Stop working." Fitz ordered sternly making her chuckle.  
"Yes Dad."  
"Will you be home for breakfast?" Karen asked as she hugged her goodbye. Liv after a lost battle was staying at the Residence, which she had planned to overturn the verdict once Cy was out of the hospital so she could be with him.  
"I'm not sure sweetheart, if you don't see me before school, you will definitely see me after okay?"  
"Okay."  
"Get some down time Liv," Gerry said as he kissed her cheek  
"I will." She promised

Fitz found Olivia in sitting in a chair beside Cyrus, one hand placed gently over his while the other held an old and worn copy of Little Women that she was reading outloud. He stood by the door leaning against it listening to her read. A smile crept up on his face as he imagined one day she would be reading to their children. Olivia turned towards the door and smiled upon seeing him. She had felt his presence long before she turned around. She rose from her seat and walked up to him,

"Dare one asks what that smile on your face is for?"  
"No reason. Just appreciating the view." Olivia rolled her eyes as she leaned into his embrace.  
"Little Women? I always pictured him to be a Tolstoy kind of a guy."  
"With his patience?" Fitz chuckled,  
"Good point."  
"He bought me the classics when I turned two and he and my parents have been reading them to me since. They taught me to love books."  
"No hungry caterpillar for you?" He asked teasingly,  
"In the first year of my life maybe. Whenever I would get sick Uncle Cy would read me Little Women. If he wasn't in the vicinity he'd call and read to me over the phone." Fitz kissed her and the forehead.  
"Any changes?"  
"Not yet but the doctor did say because of the extent of the surgery he's pretty goofed up in meds. His body is just dealing with the trauma and more than likely wake up sometime tomorrow. Hopefully in time for James."

Fitz took her hand in his and led her back to the chair she was sitting on and sat down pulling her to his lap. Liv relaxed in his arms resting her head on his shoulder handing the book over to him as she yawned suddenly exhausted. With an arm securely around Liv, Fitz held the book with his free hand and began to read. Not long after he felt Olivia slip into slumber. He smiled, and planted his lips on her temple glad that she was finally resting. When the nurse came in to check on Cyrus she smiled at the sight of Olivia curled up in Fitz arms as they both slept peacefully as though they were in a comfortable bed instead of a hospital high back arm chair intended for patients. She had seen the whole family interaction earlier that evening and there was no denying that there was a lot of love between them. She couldn't help but notice that in the last year and a bit since the President had announce his divorce, he had come out of his shell and very much a man for the people, to see him happier than ever was great to see.

Fitz woke suddenly, uncertain as to why. He tried to sit up to check on Cy without waking Liv but she stirred the moment he moved. Liv jumped to her feet when she saw that Cyrus was awake.

"Hey Uncle Cy. It's about time you joined the land of the living." She greeted kissing him on and the forehead and giving his hand an affectionate squeeze. Cy pointed to Fitz. Liv and Fitz looked at each other curiously before Fitz bent down to where Cy was trying to speak. Immediately Fitz burst out laughing while Liv looked at them both as if they were crazy,  
"He said, take your hands off my niece." Olivia chuckled and rolled her eyes.  
"You tell him Uncle Cy."  
"Nice Liv, I thought we were on the same side." Fitz protested pouting.  
"Seeing as you two have joined forces, why don't I grab the doctor to check on you and call James to let him know you're awake and fine, " Olivia nodded gratefully.  
"Thank you,"  
"Sure, I'll be right back." Fitz ran a hand down her back as he left.  
"I'm so glad you're okay Uncle Cy." She said leaning down to hug him as best as she could.  
"I told you I would be Kid. How's life in the White House? Today go smoothly?"  
"All is well. You have nothing to worry about. I may have redecorated your office, added a few feminine touches, but aside from that nothing else to really report." She teased,  
"Very funny Liv." The doctor came shortly after and was finishing up just as Fitz came back into the room.  
"James sends his love. He's on his way with Ella. He insisted. So I said we'll take her home with us if he's wanting to take the second shift now. Hey Liv, did you tell Cy about the new couch we got for his office, with the flowers all over it?" Fitz asked as he came in not missing a beat.  
"Doc, can you remind Satan's spawn over there that I have a heart condition and agitating it is not only bad for my health but also his." The doctor laughed,  
"Take it easy on him for a few more hours,"  
"Duly noted Doc." Fitz replied,  
"Besides, if you want to keep courting his niece I would thread carefully." He added as Cyrus nodded in complete agreement.

*** Hope you all enjoyed this chapter. It'll be a long road to recovery for Cy, but he's going to be okay. Thanks again for those who regularly review. I truly suck at replying, but I appreciate them more than words can express. You totally spur me on to work on the next chapter. Hope you're all having a great week so far! Be blessed always! ***


	18. Chapter 18

For the weeks that followed Liv juggled between being Fitz's second in command and Cyrus' secondary if not primary caregiver. All the while still fulfilling most of her duties to Coop, well at least the ones that didn't require her physical presence. Not to mention there was the new aspect of her relationship with Fitz that demanded her time more than all her other official duties did put together. They were in that phase of their relationship where everything was new and rarely if ever wanted to be apart. Especially Fitz. Her time was split between Cyrus and Fitz. Coop knew that it was beginning to take its toll on her.

"I'll be back in a few days. Coop's been extremely gracious about my physically not being there which I know he has only tolerated thus far because of our history. This is the first time he's asked me to fly home in weeks and it's with good reason. I have been planning this event for almost a year. Aside from having to be there to make sure it goes off without a hitch, I'd like to see the fruits of my labour." Liv explained patiently knowing Fitz was reluctant to see her go. She didn't even want to imagine what he was going to be like when it was time for her to go back for real. Fitz knew he was sulking but he wasn't ready to not her around, even if it were just for a few days.  
"I'm sorry. I'm just going to miss you." Olivia smiled and squeezed his hand that was in hers.  
"I know. I'll miss you too. But you're going to be very busy. I have filled up your week back to back, and its not like you can't call me while I'm away. We'll be." She was trying to placate him and they both knew it. The chances of her being extremely busy the moment she hit the ground in Paris was also a high one. It made her look forward to the quiet plane ride to and from.

Cyrus who was beginning to worry about her over exhausting herself was more than happy to see her try to regain some of her own normalcy back. He knew she enjoyed her temporary post as Fitz's chief of staff and how it's best perk was she got to legally hang out with her now boyfriend. At the same time she was burning the candle on both ends as she insisted on making sure he was okay. Taking care of him as though he didn't have a nurse to tend to his needs. Though if he were honest with himself his quick recovery was a result of the very love she poured out to him. It made him grateful and determined not to take her for granted.

"Kid, I'll be fine. I'll see you in a week. I insist you go for the full week. Give yourself some down time. I will keep the baby pacified in your absence." Cyrus promised.  
"Ha! Good luck with that. I am surprised he didn't offer to fly me there himself."  
"Yeah too bad about that meeting he had to attend huh?" Olivia grinned,  
"You didn't." she asked in disbelief.  
"You forget who taught you everything you know."  
"I didn't forget, I just never thought you'd stoop so low Uncle Cyrus. He'd so kill you if he ever found out."  
"As the only living member of your family, I think I am safe. He knows if he ever wants to ask for your hand in marriage, he has to go through me first." Olivia laughed,  
"We are so no where near that Uncle Cyrus, but thank you. I could use a few days to myself. I've been single for so long that this whole couple thing it certainly taking some getting used to."  
"It's understandable kid. You just go and enjoy your down time. Have a little fun. You can report for duty in a week."  
"Uncle Cy, being here isn't a duty. You're family. I love you. I can't imagine being anywhere else. Don't get me wrong, I am looking forward to getting some down time, but I have loved being here. I love Fitz, the kids, spending time with you, James and Ella."  
"I know that Liv, but you have been working far too hard. As your Uncle who loves and adores you, I want, no need you to take some time out."  
"That heart condition has so made you soft Uncle Cy." She teased dropping a kiss on his head before leaning down to hug him goodbye.  
"Don't I know it, now scoot. I know you still need to say goodbye to your boyfriend before you jump on that plane." Olivia rolled her eyes,  
"Boyfriend makes it sound like we're in high school."  
"Fine, man friend."  
"Goodbye Uncle Cy, love you." She said chuckling.  
"Bye kid, love you too."

With her bags already in the bar, all that was left to do was say goodbye to Fitz and the kids who were waiting for her at the residence.

"You guys take care of your Dad okay. Make sure he comes home to dinner if only to eat, and have to head back to the oval." One of things that had been enforced in Liv's presence was family dinner. Though there were the occasions when he literally could not step away, for the most part they were able to share a meal together as a family, even if he had to return to his office shortly after.  
"We will. You'll call right?" Karen asked as hugged Olivia's middle tightly.  
"Of course sweetheart. You know, you can call me anytime while I'm away like always."  
"We'll be fine Liv. Don't worry about us. You just do what you need to do and try to get some rest somewhere in there." Gerry assured her as he kissed her on the cheek.  
"Thanks Ger, you're in charge of these two." She said affectionately dropping her lips to Karen's head.  
"Great, that'll be fun." He replied sarcastically,  
"You call me if the big one gives you a hard time. I'll set him straight." Fitz feigned a wounded look.  
"Come on Bug, let's give them some alone time, you know how Dad gets." Olivia burst out laughing.  
"Bye guys. I'll call you as soon as I land. Love you both."  
"We love you too Liv," they replied in unison giving her one last hug before leaving them alone. Fitz wasted no time to pull her into his arms and hugging her tightly.  
"I don't want to let you go." He murmured,  
"I know, but I'll be back in a week."  
"I don't want to let you go ever," Olivia looked up at him, and placed a hand on his cheek.  
"Fitz,"  
"Marry me," he blurted out.  
"Fitz," she answered surprised stepping out of his embrace.  
"Liv,"  
"I, you can't. I can't, I…" Olivia struggled to construct a sentence. She closed her eyes,  
"You can't ask me to marry you just because you don't want to let me go Fitz. That's not fair."  
"That's not the reason why I asked." He protested, but he knew the words sounded as hollow to her ears as it did to his. He loved her, and could not imagine life without her, but marriage was a huge step that he knew they both were not quite ready for. She knew him well enough to know where his proposal was rooted from. He hung his head,  
"I'm sorry Liv."  
"I have to go. I don't want to miss my flight. I'll call you when I land okay. We can talk later. Love you." She said giving him a quick hug goodbye before turning to leave. Fitz caught her arm,  
"I love you." Olivia nodded. She didn't doubt that for a moment. She gave him a small smile and squeezed his hand before she left.

Fitz felt like an absolute ass hat. There was no shadow of doubt that he loved her her, and that he wanted to marry her, but she deserved a better time, a better circumstance and a better proposal. He managed to make it look like he only wanted to marry her because he wanted to keep her in the country.

Olivia grumbled frustrated as her mind refused to stop processing her exchange with Fitz. All she wanted was to forget it. She wasn't quite ready to process and was wanting nothing more than to shelf it till she absolutely and necessarily had to. They both knew they were endgame, and that one day she would like to think that was where they were headed, but not right now. Especially not in the way he did it. It made her mad at him that he would be so careless. There were some moments you can never take back and that was one of them.

She wasn't at all surprised to find a message from him the moment she turned her phone back on when she arrived in Paris.

"I'm so sorry Livi. That was stupid. Though I meant every word, I know it's not the right time. I'm sorry I ruined the moment Liv. I just… call me. I love you."  
"Carrie!" Liv looked up from where she was about to reply and saw Coop sprinting over to her. She grinned as she engulfed her into his arms,  
"I've missed you Car." She murmured into his chest,  
"Oh Coop, you have no idea how I have missed you." Coop pulled back slightly to look at her,  
"That sounded a tad loaded."  
"You have no idea. Why are you in jeans?" she asked noticing how casual he looked.  
"You're in jeans." He pointed out.  
"Err, I was going to get changes the moment I got into the office." She answered with a raised eyebrow.  
"No need. I have a surprise for you." Olivia cocked her head to the side suspiciously,  
"Ah, do we not have an event in a couple of days?"  
"We do, but you my friend need a day off. A day of fun and as you're beloved Bestie, it is my duty to give you such a day. So I have scheduled a day off for us both, in truth I told everyone you weren't arriving till tomorrow."  
"You're kidding?"  
"Ah no. Between being chief of staff and Cyrus primary caregiver, I am willing to bet the first hour you've had to yourself was that first hour on the plane, and judging from the look on your face even that wasn't peaceful."  
"Gotta love BFF radar. So what's the plan?" Coop grinned at her,  
"Disneyland baby." He said pulling out their yearly pass from his back pocket.  
"I have the car." Olivia found herself hugging him again,

"I take back every mean thing I said about you."  
"Very funny Pope. Let's go. We can talk or not talk about what's bothering you."

Liv kept their conversation Cyrus and children centered which did not at all escape Coop. He knew that they were officially together and that they were spending a lot of time together. That she loved him. At the same time, he knew that the intensity of their relationship so quickly in the game was starting to scare her. Though she had relationships before, she had never felt for anyone what she felt for Fitz. The fact that he was married with kids, and possibly if not definitely divorced his wife to be with her, made her nervous. Frankly it scared her. She felt some pressure of not living up to the expectation he had of her in his head. What if he regretted it in the end?

"Yo Car,"  
"Yeah," she said shaking the cobwebs in her mind realizing that she had contributed very little to the conversation Coop was trying to have.  
"You okay?"  
"I will be. Thanks for today. I know we haven't really done anything yet, but the mere anticipation is enough. I haven't really had a chance to think outside Cyrus and POTUS."  
"So to bring up the subject of POTUS you have tried so hard to avoid, what gives?"  
"Let's just say he was finding it really hard to say goodbye,"  
"That's fair enough. I suppose this was a sneak preview of what it would be like when Cyrus resumes his post and you come back to Paris. Hang on, you are coming back to Paris right?" he said turning his head. It occurred to him that she may just choose to decide to stay in DC permanently.  
"I honestly hadn't thought that far ahead. I mean I didn't go home for Christmas thinking to hook up with the POTUS. I just wanted to go home for awhile, see family, hang out with POTUS and see if what we thought was there, really was there, you know without the complication of him being married. I never anticipated we would go from go to supersonic. Don't get me wrong, I have loved every minute of it, but it's gone so fast, it's going so fast." Olivia paused for a moment,  
"In the midst of telling me he never wants to let me go, he said Marry me." Coop spun his head to look at her and realizing he was driving and swerved to the side of the road to stop.  
"Smooth Coop," she said with an amused chuckle.  
"HE WHAT!"  
"I know right. Is there something wrong with me that I didn't jump at that, or was at least thrilled to hear him ask? I mean the man is the love of my life, I can't imagine being with anyone else, yet when he asked me to marry him the first thing that came to mind was bolt. Is that a sign? When he asked, I was almost insulted." She admitted.  
"As your BFF, I understand where you get the almost insulted. It's not how anyone wants to be proposed to. After all, you are still very new, and not quite out of the honeymoon phase yet. Throw in your fear of commitment, and lack sense of worthiness well, you have what we have." Olivia's mouth dropped open, earning Coop a smack on the arm.  
"Tell me I'm wrong. You Olivia Pope have an amazing gift at convincing everyone that they are worth gold, but not yourself. I'm not sure where that comes from, but you deserve happiness just as much as the next person Carrie. It may have not been the best timing in the world, but that man loves you and would marry you in a heartbeat if you let him. You were surprised, but it doesn't mean you don't want it. I'd say it's because you want it so much that you're scared of it. Because it wasn't the way you imagined it would be, the conventional way, that he did it without really thinking, that he didn't mean it, that he'd change his mind, but honey I am willing to bet, well before he signed those divorce papers he'd thought as far as this as your endgame." Olivia muttered something incoherently,  
"What was that?" he asked grinning hearing enough to decipher what she had said,  
"I said I really hate you sometimes."  
"I know honey. I do." He said patting her on the knee before starting the car again.

Olivia had sent Fitz a quick message when they had first got in the car Disney bound. She wasn't up for talking to him just yet, but she didn't want to torture him by not letting him know that she had arrived safely. She knew he would be torturing himself enough.

"Hey, arrived safely. Will call you once I'm home and settled in tonight. We'll talk I promise. Love you."

Olivia and Coop had a blast in Disneyland, as they always do. It was their de-stress mechanism. There was nothing like riding a rollercoaster that scares you out of your wits that has you screaming for your life to gain some perspective and release any pent up aggression, frustration and excess emotion.

"Thanks Coop, for today, for everything." She said hugging him gratefully as they stood at her door. It just before midnight and they were both exhausted, but completely energized ready for the chaotic days that were sure to follow.  
"What are friends for? Call the POTUS, have a sleep in. I don't want to see you in the office till noon. Give your body a moment to adjust to the time difference and recover from jetlag."  
"You are the best boss ever."  
"Don't you forget it, night Car."  
"Night Coop."

Too exhausted to even unpack or get changed, Olivia collapsed on her couch and reached for the phone. She looked at the time, it was only six in the morning in DC but she knew he'd be up. He'd be showered and getting ready to go downstairs for breakfast with the kids at seven.

"Hey," he answered somewhat uncertainly that it pinched at Olivia's heart.  
"Morning Baby," she replied affectionately easing his nerves. He couldn't help smile each time she called him Baby.  
"Did you just get home? What time do you call this young lady? Coop already working you to the ground?"  
"Hardly. The little sneak gave us both the day off. He said I needed a chill day so he took us to Disneyland."  
"Only you two would make Disneyland your playground." He teased with a chuckle.  
"Best playground ever." Olivia stated.  
"How's the world's most impatient patient doing?" she asked.  
"Well not long after your plane took off, I caught him in his office. I think he was making sure we hadn't re-decorated it in his absence."  
"You could have just told him that I have been using the empty office across the hall."  
"And what fun would that be? And don't lay that one on me, you have had ample opportunities to tell him that yourself." Olivia smiled,  
"That is true."  
"Hey Liv," Liv took a deep breath knowing what was coming,  
"Yeah,"  
"I'm sorry sweetheart. I didn't mean for it to come out the way it did. I want you know that I have every intention of making good with that question, but I know now is not the right time. I didn't mean to frighten you or diminish what it would mean when the time finally came."  
"I know Fitz. You're not the only one who finds it hard to be apart. Who's scared to be apart. The thing is I'm scared all the time." She confessed.  
"I have never felt for anyone what I feel for you. It's so intense, it's so instinctual and for someone who always thinks first, our relationship has always been feeling first and as great as it has been, there's a part of me when who wonders when the ball is going to drop. What if you change your mind? What if I am not who you thought I was. You have this not entirely true perception of me, and it's so much to live up to that I am scared to fall short of that and disappoint you." For all of her confidence, and maturity Fitz realized just how young Olivia still was, and inexperienced.  
"Sweetheart, you could never disappoint me. You are everything I could have ever wanted and so much more than I deserve. What we have is instinctual and certainly nothing I have ever encountered before. You had me from that first moment you ripped me to shreds. While you are so careful to be guarded with everyone else, I love that you unravel before me without effort, it's as though your soul knows mine and vice versa. All this time I have been so scared that you would meet someone you didn't need to wait for, someone who wasn't married, who didn't have kids, who wasn't the leader of the free world, someone who didn't live such a complicated existence. Someone who was free to love you, so when we finally got our shot, I held on and so tightly."  
"I wasn't complaining Fitz," Olivia said softly.  
"I'm holding on just as tightly as you are. I just need you to know that I still have a career here in Paris, and I need you to be okay with the fact that I still have a life here that I'm not quite ready to walk away from. I love you, and I want to be with you but you fell in love with the ambitious and incredibly driven Olivia Pope, and though she may have evolved, and her dreams have expanded I'm still that Olivia Pope."  
"I wouldn't have you any other way Liv. I get it I do. As much as I can't even begin to fathom what it's going to be like when you finally head back to Paris, I would never stand in the way of that."  
"Thank you."  
"Liv,"  
"Hmmm,"  
"You don't need to be scared. We're in this together. We can get through anything as long as we're in this together."


	19. Chapter 19

"Hi Baby," Olivia greeted switching ears as she dug through her bag fishing for her keys. She had a couple of days before she had to return to DC so she had been running non stop since her arrival to ensure that she had Coop set up for what's left of her time in DC.

"Hey sweetheart you home?"

"Sort of and briefly. Coop and I have dinner with the French Prime Minister and his wife at their residence. So I'm just about to take a quick shower, get dressed and Coop has a car coming for us in about an hour. I was going to call you post shower so we can talk while I get got ready."

"You could still do that."

"You mind?"

"Of course not."

"Thank you. Give me fifteen minutes."

"Take your time. Love you."

"Love you too."

Much of their conversation since her brief return to France had been rushed and short. By the time her day ended, his began and vice versa. They made the best of it knowing she was only so busy because she was still working multiple roles. As promised after her shower Olivia called Fitz and ran through his schedule as she did daily. They went through official things first to ensure he was ready for his day.

"I miss you," Olivia murmured softly making Fitz smile.

"I miss you too Sweetheart. I'm counting down the days."

"How were the kids this morning? Karen has an English pop quiz today and Gerry has a soccer game this afternoon so he won't be home till just before dinner. Karen said she was going to watch his game and just go home together."

"Karen's a little nervous about her pop quiz but she said you quizzed her last night through Skype so we did a quick revision this morning at breakfast. Gerry is excited for his game. I haven't told him but I was hoping to catch some of it."

"He'd love that. I've arranged for the private view box to be reserved for you so you can slip in and out without detection." Olivia knew he hated it when his job overshadowed his children's events.

"Thank you Liv. So dinner tonight, is it something official?"

"Not really. The Prime Minister, his wife Genevieve, Coop and I have gotten to be pretty good friends and being close to each other's age we have a lot in common, when there are official events we have to attend the four of us sort of just gravitate towards each other and have been hanging out on the social capacity as a result of it. They know about Cy and me being out of town they haven't really seen me so they insisted on dinner at their place tonight. Which if previous experience to go by its going to be a night of great company, good food and excellent wine."

"The trifecta."

"Absolutely." Fitz couldn't help but envy that Coop was the one she was able to have and travel social circles and events with.

"Bummed to be missing Ger's game though." Fitz chuckled,

"I love how dinner with the Prime Minister and his wife equates to Gerry's soccer game with the same importance."

"Well it does. I don't normally get to see his games so I'm a little disappointed I am missing this one."

"He is too. He has said that he has grown accustomed to having the loudest cheer squad there." Fitz teased. Between Olivia and Karen, Gerry was well supported. Liv and Karen were unashamedly loud.

"I bet he has. Listen I better get going. Call you when I get back?"

"Sounds like a plan. Have a good time tonight."

"You have a good rest of the day Baby. Love you."

"Love you."

Olivia had literally just put her shoes on when she heard Coop come through her front door. Coop dropped his keys by the door and called out to Olivia to let her know that he was there.

"Car is about five minutes away Liv so no need to rush."

"I'm all done. You look great. New suit? Hang on is that the suit we bought while we were in Copenhagen?" Coop nodded,

"The very same. The shirt is the one you sent me last month."

"I have excellent taste." She stated. She had seen the shirt while she and Karen were shopping one afternoon heavily disguised to avoid the paparazzi that had been very interested in her relationship with the Grant children.

"I can't argue with you there." He agreed. Ever since they had met she had become his favourite shopping partner. The shopping quarter of Paris loved them.

"Marc Jacobs looks good on you."

"So POTUS check in yet?" Coop asked well versed in what was routine.

"Yep briefly."

"Have you thought about your long term plans?" He asked. Olivia looked up from where she was putting her lipstick and phone into her clutch,

"You seriously starting that conversation now?" She asked knowing that he had been wanting to ask that very question the moment she returned. Coop shrugged.

"You can't say you're surprised I'm asking the question."

"No but the timing is a little weird seeing as we have to be at dinner in a half hour."

"Meaning you have been avoiding thinking about it because it would mean making a decision." He deduced.

"I'm not ready to think about it Coop. It's all so new and I'm still getting used to the whole thing. I promise I won't leave you in a lurch."

"As nice as that sounds Carrie, that wasn't my point. The last thing I want is for you to stay in Paris out of a sense of obligation to me."

"Please don't misunderstand what I mean," she pleaded,

"And don't misunderstand what I mean. As awesome as it would be to have you by my side for my whole term, as my friend, my best friend your happiness is what is most important. Which is why I am bringing this up. I never want you to think that choosing a life with POTUS would disappoint me. If you want to be with him, be with him. I would never want to hold you back. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to take chances. If you're ready to take them, leap. Love like that doesn't come every day." Olivia crossed the room to where he stood and wrapped her arms around his middle.

"Thank you." Coop wrapped his arms around her hugging her tightly against him.

Dinner with the Prime Minister and his wife was fun as always. As formally attired as they were by halfway through dinner both boys had removed their jackets and the ladies had removed their shoes and wandering around barefoot in the residence.

"Is it true Cherie?" Genevieve asked softly leaning over to Olivia out of the boys hearing distance. Olivia smiled realising that though she and Fitz had remained discreet, they weren't exactly hiding the new status of their relationship.

"If you're asking what I think you're asking, the answer is yes. We are seeing each other."

"He is very handsome." She stated as though it made sense for that reason alone making Olivia laugh.

"Yes he is,"

"Is he you know good, in..."

"Please stop. I am not answering that." Genevieve gave her a knowing wink making her blush. Truth was she and Fitz hadn't gone down that road. Not for the lack of want but for the mere fact that he was trying not to rush her. That and they were careful not to give the kids the wrong impression. They were at that impressionable age and they didn't want to give them the mixed signal about sex. Therefore she and Fitz kept a respectable distance and clear about boundaries, especially in front of his kids.

"You must really care for him." Genevieve said out of the blue.

"Why do you say that?"

"It's a look you get when you're talking about him and his children."

"I do Gen. I really do and it scares me." She admitted. Gen was her closest girlfriend, with the exception of Coop she was Olivia's closest confidant.

"That is only natural Cherie, dating him would come with a lot more what do you Americans call it luggage?" Olivia smiled,

"Baggage, and yes it does. It's not even the ex wife and children. I love his children. It's the fact that he's the President. I don't want to just be his first lady and please take that in the right heart. I guess I'm scared to lose me in the enormity of his life and his calling."

"No one is making you choose one or the other Cherie,"

"Maybe not now, but I know I have to make that decision eventually. When that time comes I don't want to disappoint anyone."

"You mean Cooper?"

"Or Fitz. Will he really be okay with me living so far away?"

"It won't be forever."

"It will be for at least as long as he is in office unless Coop wants to retire before that which I doubt. He loves his job."

"If he loves you which I am willing to bet he does, he'll wait for as long as he needs to. The boys aside, what do you want? Because Cherie, that's all that really matters."

"I want him Gen. All I've ever wanted was him." Olivia admitted not only to Genevieve but to herself for the first time.

"Then you'll know when it's time to be with him."

Olivia and Coop worked tirelessly till it was time for her to head back to DC. Unfortunately they weren't able to finish the conversation he had started in her apartment.

"Try and rest in between your multiple jobs okay. No need to worry so much about me. I've got things handled here." Coop said trying to reassure her.

"Coop,"

"Yes Liv,"

"I know we never finished that conversation. It's not because I don't want to. It's just that I'm still sorting it all out in my head you know."

"I know Car. I know you. The reason why I brought it up is because I want you to start thinking about it. You deserve to be happy. I think this is your chance. Time to leap so to speak."

"I'm just scared." Coop dropped his lips to her forehead.

"I know that too Car. I'm not rushing you. I'm just trying to open your eyes to see what's in front of you."

"I appreciate that, more than you know."

"Now go be Chief of Staff to the POTUS."

"For the record I love my job as the Chief of Staff for the US Ambassador for France."

"Good to know. I heard he's a lot more fun to shop with than POTUS."

"Totally!"

"Have a safe trip Car. Call me when you get in."

"I will do." She promised. One last meaningful hug she walked through the gates waving at him till he was no longer in sight.

Her flight arrived extremely early in DC. In an almost empty flight she walked into what seemed like a ghost town airport. She assumed it was because it was so early, but as she reached the gates and saw one Fitzgerald Thomas Grant the Third leaning against the post she grinned. Without hesitation she walked into his ourstretched arms.

"God I've missed you." She murmured into his chest as he held her tightly.

"You have no idea." He replied.

"Where are the rest of the passenger's of my flight?" Olivia asked curiously not making a move to step out of his embrace.

"They have been re-routed to another exit."

"You do doting boyfriend incredibly well." She complimented.

"I try."

"How's Cy? How are the kids?" She asked as he began to lead her back to the car without releasing her.

"They're good. They miss you. Karen will be very mad that I didn't wake her to come pick you up at the airport. Cy, James and Ella will be coming over for lunch to see you."

"You think we can get home before Karen and Gerry wake up?" She asked wanting to surprise them.

"Well it's a Saturday so the chances of them being asleep past 7am is a possibility."

"Great let's go." She said tightening her hold around his middle.

Fitz smiled as he watched Olivia tip toed into Karen's room careful not to wake her till it was time. Olivia sat on Karen's bed and leaned over to kiss her on the forehead and ran her fingers through her hair trying to coax her out of her slumber. When Karen opened her eyes and realised Liv was sitting before her she grinned and threw her arms around her neck.

"Liv you're back! I've missed you."

"I've missed you too. What do you say we wake your brother and have breakfast?"

"Absolutely." Olivia waited till Katen slipped a hoodie over her pajamas before they headed to Gerry's room. Fitz stifled a laugh as both Liv and Karen jumped onto Gerry's bed waking him with a jolt,

"What the heck?"

"Morning sleepy head. Time for breakfast."

"Liv!" He exclaimed excitedly hugging her.

"Aww slugger I've missed you. Come on, your Dad's making breakfast."

"Is he now?" Fitz asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Like you can say no to these three faces?"

"Yeah, we all know I'm soft when it comes to you three. Let's go, what do you guys want for breakfast."

The four of them enjoyed a rather rambunctious family breakfast. Both Gerry and Karen took turns in filling her in on what she missed whilst she was away as though they hadn't spoken every day that she was away. After breakfast Gerry had to get ready for his soccer practice and Karen for her cello lesson giving Liv and Fitz the rest of the morning together.

"You must be exhausted." He stated as they walked hand in hand through the Rose Garden.

"I'm a little tired but mostly I'm just enjoying being with you." She said hugging his arm.

"Well you can be with me without the extra physical activity." He pointed out amused.

"I know but if I want to last till lunch with the Beene's I need to keep moving."

"We could move it to dinner if you want."

"No, I really want to see him. Make sure he's okay."

"I figured. How about we sit?" Fitz suggested pointing at the steps. Olivia nodded allowing him to sit on the fourth step before sitting between his legs on the step below. Fitz wrapped his arms around her shoulders and she leaned against him.

"Fitz,"

"Yeah sweetheart?" He answered resting his chin on her shoulder.

"I want you to know that I want you. I want us. That from the moment we met that's all I've ever wanted."

"Me too." He answered his voice cracking with emotion as his heart began to expand merely by her words.

"You're my end game. I also know that if you and I are going to make an honest go of this, I can't be an ocean away. In saying that I can't just up and leave on Coop. I'd need to give him sufficient time to replace me and hand over properly. So I'm proposing a few months, six at most to end my seasin in Paris right. It'll also give me a chance to determine my career path once I return."

"Are you sure Livi? I don't want you to do this because you feel like you have to. I know how much you love your job, how much you love Paris. I don't want to ask you to give that up."

"I love you more. You're not asking me to do anything. I want to do this because I want to give us the best chance we have. Being apart wouldn't be doing that. Truth is I find it just as hard to be apart from you as you do me. This wasn't an easy decision to make, but I believe in my gut it's the right one." She turned her head to look uo at him and saw the tears in his eyes. She cupped his cheek and wiped his tears with her thumb. Fitz dropped his lips to hers, kissing her softly and meaningfully.

"I love you Liv. Heart and soul I love you. I am all in." He whispered as his forehead sat against hers.

"That's always good to hear." She replied as she kissed him once more before leabing against him once more.

"I have a proposition for you." He said as she played with his hands that were now comfortably resting against her stomach.

"Intriguing, run it."

"Britta Kagen is pregnant and due for maternity leave in about five months. I didn't want to bring it up earlier because I didn't want you to think that I was just trying to keep you here. I wanted to know that you wanted to stay for you. Would you be interested in filling her position for her year long maternity leave?"

"I'd love it but wouldn't that look a tad unprofessional, the POTUS hiring his girlfriend to be his Communications director?"

"No more than hiring her as his interim Chief of Staff." He teased earning a soft elbow to his stomach.

"Oww. Liv it's no secret that we held on to that job for as long as we could in hope that you would crack and take us up on our offer. That aside you are made for the job. Britta's done an exemplary job, but you and I both know you would kick it out the park. So what do you say?"

"It's not the worst job offer in the world." She answered teasingly.

"And it sure has it's perks. Can I think about it for a bit. I know it seems like a no brainer and it probably isn't but I so feel that our lines are getting blurrier and blurrier that's all."

"Of course,"

"One more thing,"

"I have my own place." Liv held her breath knowing that he would fight her on it. After Cy's operation it was a battle to move from the residence to the Beene's despite the practicalities of her just living with the Beene's for that period. It ended up being a negotiaton of dividing her time between the two places.

"Fine, but somewhere close by and I get to visit."

"Deal." She said a little surprised he gave in without a fight.

"So how was your dinner with the Prime Minister abd his wife? You never got to tell me because you had one too many glasses of wine." He asked changing the topic,

"Did I ever! Sorry for the drunk dialling."

"No apologies necessary. I love having my girlfriend slur her undying love for me." Olivia blushed embarrassed vaguely remembering the conversation.

"You'd be happy to know that Genevieve thinks you're handsome and that you have her vote."

"Thank you I think..."


	20. Chapter 20

"It's only for a few months," Olivia said trying to reassure Karen who looked panicked when she had told her of her plans. Fitz had offered to do it as a whole family but Olivia felt that it was something she needed to do alone. She had left Karen till last knowing it would be the hardest. Telling Gerry was hard enough, but he was older and as attached as he was to her, it paled into comparison to Karen. Karen always knew that Liv was only there in to cover for Cyrus but she had hoped that being in a relationship with her Dad would mean she would decide to stay. Olivia knew the root of Karen's fears and her heart broke for her.

"I will be home as often as I can in between." She promised. Like father like daughter Karen shut down before her. Like Fitz she closed the world off when he was hurt and felt betrayed.

"Sweetheart, you will still hear from me every day. You are important to me and I would never let something like distance come between us. I have to do this Kare. I still have responsibilities in Paris that I need to end properly."

"Okay," Karen said without emotion. Without turning to look at Liv she rose from where she sat and walked out of the room.

"Give her some time Liv. She'll come on board. She's finding it hard to differentiate between you and Mom right now. After Mom left, well you know how often we hear from her." Gerry assured her as he sat next to her on the couch coming from the other room.

"I know Ger. I get it I do. I'm not going anywhere. She can push all she wants but I love her. I love you both. I may feel a little hurt but I get it and I love her too much to just leave her be." Gerry's eyes watered at her declaration. He never doubted for a moment that Liv loved them. It was another to hear her speak so passionately about them as though they were hers.

"Thank you Liv."

"For what kiddo?" She asked surprised.,

"For loving us that much."

"Honey, it's not exactly hard to love you. Either of you." She said standing to her feet and dropping a kiss on top of his head before heading back to Cyrus' office to do some work.

Fitz noticed the strain between Liv and Karen in the days that followed. He had offered to talk to Karen himself but Liv had asked him to let her handle it. Karen looked up surprised when she saw Liv drive up to pick her up that Thursday afternoon. For as long as Liv had been back and they had returned to school Thursday afternoons were their date days. Judging from how she had been behaving she didn't expect Liv to show up that afternoon. She had been receiving the looks of disappointment from Gerry and she knew that of Olivia hadn't told him to let her handle it he would have sat her down and given her a piece of his mind. It wasn't lost on any of them that she was acting bratty but they all understood the reasoning and gave a calculated amount of grace. Fitz and Gerry would never allow her to cross a line where she was rude to Olivia and she wasn't. She never would be.

"Hi sweetheart. How was school?" Liv asked affectionately as she tucked a loose strand of hair behind Karen's ear as she sat in the front passenger seat. Despite how much she pushed Liv away she didn't budge. She made sure that she poured the same amount of love to her as normal, if not a little more. Karen's eyes brimmed with tears as she looked up at Liv.

"Oh sweetheart come here," Liv said unbuckling her seatbelt so she could pull Karen into her arms.

"Baby, I'll be back. I promise you. Just because I'm not here physically doesn't mean I stop loving you. I will still call you every day and a few months isn't that long. It'll go real quick. I'll be home when I can and you and Gerry can always come during your holidays."

"I'm sorry Liv. I'm sorry I've been such a brat."

"Oh honey. You can be as bratty as you want and though it may hurt my feelings you have to know that nothing can ever stop me from loving you." Karen dropped her gaze to her lap. Liv cupped her her chin with her hand and lifted her gaze to meet hers.

"That's what you were trying to do wasn't it? Push me away because you think that's all I need to stop? Sweetheart, loving you is a choice and no one forced me into it. Therefore I love you unconditionally. You are this amazing incredibly smart, intuitive, incredibly funny and affectionate young lady who I feel incredibly blessed to watch grow up. I wouldn't miss any of it for the world."

When they arrived home for dinner that night both Fitz and Gerry sighed with relief almost immediately noticing that the dark cloud had shifted. After Liv had tucked Karen into bed for the night she checked in on Gerry as she always did.

"You guys seem better." He observed.

"Yeah she just needed to know that she can behave as bratty as she wants and though it may hurt my feelings I would never stop loving her. We've talked and I think we'll be okay."

"Good, I'm glad. If she didn't have an attitude adjustment by dinner tonight I was going to sit her down for some stern talking to. I get she's upset but she knows better than that."

"Thanks for always having my back Ger. And she's a new teenager. She's bound to have issues and throw in her current relationship with your Mom...I get it kiddo but thank you. I'm heading to Uncle Cy's tonight so I probably won't be here for breakfast. He has an early doctor's appointment tomorrow. I'll see you at your game tomorrow night though. I told Karen I'll meet her there after I'm done with your Dad."

"You okay to drive?" he asked. Liv smiled,

"Yes my love, I'll be fine. More and more like your Dad every day. I'll see you tomorrow honey. Have a great day at school."

Olivia found Fitz back at the Oval. He had been called to the situation room right after dinner. There were a couple of negotiations that he was in the middle of and she knew that the stress of it was starting to take their toll on him. She walked into his office wordlessly, stood by his desk and ran her fingers through his hair. Fitz lifted his gaze to her and pushed his chair back so that she could stand directly in front of him. Exhaustedly he leaned his head against her middle. Olivia wrapped her arms around his head, cradling him against her burying her face into his head while running her fingers soothingly down his back.

"Tough day huh?"

"You could say that. I'm trying not to go to war here Liv and I think I might need to."

"Then you need to. You have kept this country out of war far longer than any other President would have. I know you Fitz. You would have exhausted every possibility before even entertaining the thought of going to war. Whatever you decide, trust your gut. It hasn't led you astray so far." Fitz looked up at her in wonder. No one has ever had the ability to comfort and reassure him the way she did, the way she always had.

"How do you always know what to say?" he asked. Olivia cupped his face with both her hands and kissed him before answering,

"Because I know you. Because I love you." Fitz drew her into his arms and pulled her into his lap.

"In case I haven't told you today, I really love you."

"That's always good to hear." She replied as she snuggled into his embrace.

"You going to be here much longer?" she asked as she played with his hand that sat comfortably against her stomach.

"Probably, we're just taking a little break and I have to be back in there."

"Do you need me to stay with you till you're done? I'm staying at Cy's tonight for a very early appointment tomorrow."

"Want yes, need no. You should go before it's too late. I don't want you driving so late, and you really need to get some rest. Because I know for a fact that even know you're at the hospital with Cyrus you'll be running the West Wing from your little blackberry. Not to mention checking in with your Paris boss."

"Do I detect jealousy there?" she teased. Fitz groaned,

"No, well maybe a little. I'm not very good at sharing."

"No kidding. May I remind you that he was my boss first, therefore if loyalties were measured purely by career, it would probably have to go to him." Fitz moved his hand to tickle her in her weak spot as she squealed in protest,

"Okay okay, you win. My loyalties lie with you." Fitz grinned,

"Good to know Sweetheart, now go before I change my mind and keep you here on my lap for the rest of the night." Olivia dropped a kiss on his head and his lips as he looked up at her.

"Drop me a text when you get to Cy's so I know you got there okay."

"I will. Call me when you're back at the residence so I can say goodnight."

"Of course."

Olivia sat in the waiting room while Cy went in for his tests. As Fitz predicted she ran his office from wherever she was while she kept an eye and ear out for Cyrus. His test would show whether or not he would be fit to resume his duties in a couple of weeks as they had predicted. Judging from how he was looking Liv had no doubt he would. As much as she was looking forward to having him healthy and back at his post where he was itching to be, it left a bittersweet taste in her mouth. It meant she would have to return to Paris, and it meant she would have to say goodbye to Paris. Though she was ready to go, and believed in her gut it was the right thing to do the thought of leaving the life she had grown to love scared her. Leaving Coop was something she never anticipated she would find so hard to do, but she did. She had flown to France weeks before just for the weekend so that she could tell him what she had decided.

"You're standing in my office way ahead of schedule, unannounced, that can't be good. Am I going to require alcohol for this conversation?" he asked. Olivia pulled out a bottle of wine from behind her and two glasses and smiled at him sheepishly.

"Enough said. I could just tell you to get out of my office I never want to see you again." He said dryly meaning he knew what her decision was.

"Coop…" she said pleadingly.

"I'm kidding. Get your ass in here and start pouring." Olivia let out a sigh of relief and sat on the seat in front of his desk and opened the bottle of wine.

"So is there going to be dialogue or am I just going to have to fill in the blanks here?" Coop asked when she remained silent after handing him a full glass of red.

"I love him Coop. I want to be with him. I don't want to wait. It feels like we've waited long enough, and now that we've had the chance to be together, I don't want to miss him anymore. It's one thing to not know, and it's another to be with him and have to be apart. I know it doesn't sound very twenty first century independent woman, but he makes me happy Coop. All that aside, he loves me Coop. I have never fully felt that revelation about anyone before and now that it's here, I want to make the most of it."

"Then go for it Carrie. I want you to be happy."

"You don't hate me?"

"Maybe a little,"

"COOP…"

"I'm kidding. I could never hate you Car. For one you're the best friend I ever had, and secondly, you inspire me to take chances. If there is one thing I feel, it's Proud. I'm proud of you Carrie, because I know what it took for you to get to this place. I know what you weren't willing to compromise to get what you wanted."

"I'm going to miss this." She said looking around his office,

"I'm going to miss you most of all." She confessed looking right at him with tears in her eyes.

"Don't even start. Get in here." He said standing to his feet opening his arms out to her as she walked into them gratefully.

"I don't know how I'm going to survive without you." She murmured,

"Oh please, once you're in POTUS' arms you'll forget about little old me here, alone in Paris without a Chief of Staff, a best friend or shopping partner."

"Shut up." She said hugging him tighter.

Cyrus walked out and saw Liv lost in her thoughts as she was remembering her conversation with Coop.

"Hey Kiddo, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just sorting out a few things in my head that's all. I'm packing up my apartment in my head, and trying to sort out last minute things in my office. How did you go? Everything okay?"

"Yeah. I'm all clear. I can resume my life as POTUS' second in command in a couple of weeks." Liv stood to her feet and threw her arms around him.

"I'm so glad Uncle Cy. I'm so glad you're okay." She said tearfully hugging him tightly.

"I'm sorry I worried you. I'm sorry you've had to put your life on hold for you."

"I'm not. It's what families do Uncle Cy. It's what you've always done for me. Besides, I think I needed to be there to figure some stuff out that I probably would have run away from for as long as I could."

"So you're really going o do this?" he asked,

"Are you saying I shouldn't?" she asked with a raised eyebrow

"No honey, I want you to do what's right for you and if this is what you want then this is what I want for you."

"I love him Uncle Cy."

"Good, for what it's worth. He's crazy about you. I wouldn't let him any where near you for anything less than that."

"I love you too Uncle Cy."

They celebrated that night at the residence, and as happy as they all were with the news that Cy was all in the clear, it only highlighted that Liv would be due to leave in only a couple of weeks. After everyone had left to go home and both kids were in bed Olivia had convinced Fitz to take a walk with her.

"What goes on in that handsome head of yours?" She asked as squeezing the hand that she was holding in hers. Fitz looked down to meet her gaze and wrapped an arm around her shoulder drawing her close to him.

"That I'm going to miss you and that I can't wait till you're home for good."

"Me too. But it'll go fast. I promise. And we can take the odd trip here and there."

"I know. I've just gotten used to having you within arms reach."

"Me too. Promise you'll still be waiting for me when I get back." Fitz stopped walking and turned her so that they were standing face to face.

"You never have to worry about me waiting for you. I will always be here waiting for you. You are the love of my life Olivia Pope. I didn't know what love was till you walked into my life, and now that I know. I never want to be without it, without you. I will be waiting for as long as it takes."

"Good," she said with a small sigh,

"Hey, did you actually worry that I would change my mind?" he asked,

"I don't know. This is all new for me Fitz. I'm a little scared." She admitted.

"I know you are Sweetheart, but we're in this together. I promise."

The weeks that followed flew by so fast that they couldn't believe that they were standing at the airport saying goodbye.

"You didn't have to take me to the airport you know."

"Well if you let me fly you there I wouldn't have had to." He answered as he tightened his arms around her waist.

"Well I didn't think that using tax payers money to fly Air Force One to get your girlfriend back to France was such a good idea, till I realized you would be closing half the airport just to see me off."

"Are you complaining? Would you rather not have me here at all?" he teased.

"No, I'm not complaining. Thank you for coming to see me off. I love that you, the kids and Cy are here. Not that I need reminding but it's a nice reminder of what I'll be coming home to."

"Good to know."

"Here Liv, we got you a coffee." Gerry said as he and Karen came back from Starbucks.

"Thank you guys." She said draping an arm around each of them. Karen was doing a lot better with her leaving than she had been weeks before. When they called her fight she turned to hug Cyrus, James and Ella.

"See you soon kid. I love you." Cy said affectionately placing his lips on her forehead.

"I love you too Uncle Cy,"

"Now you take care of your sister okay?" Olivia said as she hugged Gerry.

"I will. You take care of yourself okay."

"Of course. I love you Slugger:

"I love you too Liv." Karen wrapped her arms around Liv's middle,

"I'm going to miss you Liv."

"And I am going to miss you little one. I love you, to the moon and back again."

"I love you too Liv." It took awhile for Karen to finally release her, and after she did Fitz pulled her into his arms.

"I'll see you soon sweetheart. Call when you get there."

"I will Baby. Love you."

"Love you too."


	21. Chapter 21

Liv left in such a frantic state that she couldn't quite remember what she was doing or whether she packed everything she needed. Fitz had called to tell her that Karen had been rushed to the emergency room and that was all she needed to hop on the next flight. By the time Fitz had any updates she was already up in the air. In the end it was a ruptured appendics that was potentially life threatening.

"She's fine Liv. She's out of surgery and she's in recovery. Fitz wanted to come and get you but I offered." James assured her as he pulled her into a hug,  
"Thank you for coming to get me I was just going to grab a cab and head straight to the hospital. How's Fitz holding up?"  
"He just about to lost his mind when they rushed her to the hospital but remarkably better after they knew what it was and she had come out of surgery okay."  
"I feel a little silly now. I didn't even think. I just heard Karen hospital and I grabbed what I could and headed to the airport." James draped an arm around her shoulder,  
"You and I both know the moment that kid wakes up she'd be looking for you anyway." Olivia smiled.

James asked her about Paris. With only a couple of months to go, her replacement in the pipeline, there was little left for her to do except pack up. Olivia was telling James all about the crazy Friday night with Coop which had them both laughing that when Olivia entered the hospital room to find Mellie holding Karen's hand with Fitz standing behind her she froze. Fitz looked up and saw the panic in her eyes at the sight of them. Gerry stood from where he sat and engulfed her in his arms.

"Liv, so glad you're here. Karen will be so happy to see you." Liv hugged him back tightly and Gerry felt her tremble momentarily  
"She just showed up," he added quietly in her ear as if to attempt to talk her off a ledge. "Liv hi!" Mellie said standing to her feet to greet Olivia hello. Fitz watched the myriad of emotions that flashed through her eyes  
"Mellie hi! How are you?" She asked as Mellie hugged her hello.  
"I'm great thanks. What are you doing in town? How's Paris?" It then occurred to Olivia that Mellie didn't know about her relationship with Fitz. That he hadn't told her. She looked at him with disappointment and disbelief. Fitz dropped a kiss on her cheek and gave her arm a squeeze as she stiffened at his touch.  
"I had to sort out a few things and I heard about Karen so I came to see how she was."  
"That's so sweet of you. I know the kids have gotten quite attached to you and missed you terribly after you headed back to Paris after being Fitz's Chief of Staff."  
"The feeling is more than mutual. How's she doing?" Liv asked walking over to the opposite side of where Fitz stood his eyes pleading with her.  
"She's fine. Doctor thinks she'll be out for the rest of the night." Fitz answered. Liv bent down to kiss Karen's forehead.  
"Liv, Cy's on the phone for you." James said holding his phone up. He had discreetly typed an SOS to Cyrus who bless his heart had come through for them. He knew Olivia was barely keeping it together.  
"Excuse me," she said trying to sound apologetic instead of relieved. She took James' phone from him and slipped him hers. She walked out of the hospital room without glancing at Fitz.  
"Uncle Cy..." she said suddenly exhausted,  
"I'm sorry I couldn't warn you kid. I just found out."  
"What are you apologizing for? That's her daughter. She's their mother. I was the idiot who jumped on a plane without a second thought."

"Kid,"  
"Get me out of here Uncle Cy?" She pleaded,  
Go, hop in a cab and come to the house. I'll meet you there."  
"Thank you. James has my phone so you can call him."  
"I'll see you soon Kiddo. Hold tight till then." Liv nodded and hung up. She had started walking out of the hospital the moment she started talking to Cyrus therefore all she needed to do was hail a cab. Cyrus gave her a few minutes of a head start before he called Olivia's phone.

"Hi honey," James greeted not entirely surprised. He guessed that Liv had bolted the premises. Fitz looked at the door longingly guessing that she wasn't to return.  
"Tell them I had an emergency and I needed Liv to come immediately."  
"Of course. Are you okay?"  
"The remains to be seen. I'm meeting her at the house so I'll see you when you get a chance to slip out."  
"Okay, I'll let them know." James hung up,  
"Cyrus has had an emergency and Liv's rushed to assist. They both send their apologies." Gerry shot his Dad a look,  
"That's a shame." Mellie said.  
"She'll try and come back a little later. I'm sorry I better head off too and pick up Ella from the sitter."  
"I'll walk you out." Fitz said following James out the door  
"Is she ok?" He asked worriedly when they were out of earshot. James stopped walking to look at Fitz  
"Would you be? She dropped everything the moment she heard about Karen and flew here to be with you. Not only does she find you and your ex wife in a cosy setting it comes painfully obvious that you haven't even told Mellie about your relationship. How would you be?" Fitz hung his head.  
"You better hope that she doesn't get it into her head to just jump on another plane back to France because once she's gone you and I both know you'll find it hard to get her back." Panic rose in him.  
"I'll be right behind you." He vowed. James shrugged and headed out.

Cyrus found Liv pacing in circles in his backyard. He could tell that her mind was going a million miles an hour. It hadn't occurred to him that Fitz hadn't told Mellie that he was involved with Olivia. Though he too was worried about the fall out of that revelation, he had just assumed that Fitz had handled it. It never occurred to him to ask. Nor did it seemingly occur to her to ask Fitz too.

"Liv," Cyrus said softly trying to draw her out of her state of panic.  
"I'm not the only one who assumed he had told her right?" Cyrus shook his head  
"I thought he had too."  
"So I'm not being unreasonable for being really ticked off right now right?"  
"No, but you and I both know how much that man loves you therefore you should probably give him a chance to explain before you press the eject button in your hand." Olivia closed her eyes for a moment,  
"Loving him meant all in right, so I was all in. Gosh Cy I quit my job and weeks away from packing up my life only to find out he's not all in because if he is he would have ticked that rather important box of I don't know telling his wife he's dating his Campaign Manager or was he just I don't know waiting for something better to come along?"  
"Liv, you know that's not true."  
"Do I Cy?" Liv found it hard to breathe for a moment and bent over to try and catch her breath.  
"I can't do this right now. I need to think. Can I borrow your car?"  
"Liv…"  
"Your car or a cab, either one Cy. I can't be here. I can't do this now." Cyrus sighed,  
"Take the MG." Liv raised an eyebrow, he was giving her his pride and joy to use.  
"Thank you Uncle Cy. I just need some space. I'll clean up my mess before I head back to France." She promised giving his cheek a peck before taking the keys he held out to her.

Olivia knew that Fitz would go after her the first moment he got, which would more than likely be when Mellie headed home too. She waited till his motorcade had left with his ex wife in tow before slipping into Karen's room to see her. She had bought a bouquet of Karen's favourite flowers, picked up her favourite pair of PJ's from the residence along with Buddy the bear and her very own copy of Little Women that she and Liv read together when she was sick just as Cy used to read to Liv when she was little. Liv knew she didn't really have much time before Fitz returned to the hospital in search of her. He had been messaging her since she left the hospital hour before and she hadn't replied to any of his messages. Liv read had just finished a chapter when Karen stirred.

"You came." She stated with a smile.  
"Of course I did. I promised you I'd always be here if you need me."  
"Thank you Liv."  
"Do you need anything? Are you in pain?" Karen shook her head sleepily.  
"Why don't you go back to sleep sweetheart. I'll let your Dad know you woke up so he can come back with your Mom."  
"She was here?"  
"Yeah honey, she's your Mom and she loves you." Karen nodded and drifted back to sleep.  
"Good night sweetheart." Liv said dropping her lips to Karen's forehead before slipping out of the room. Before she left the hospital she asked the nurse to notify the President that his daughter had woken up.

Fitz had dropped Mellie off back at her hotel and Gerry back at the residence before heading to the Beene's household where he had hoped Liv would be. He wasn't all together surprised that she wasn't. If he had been worried earlier, he had worked his way up to full scale panic mode.

"Did she say where she was headed?" he asked as Cyrus just shook his head. If Fitz didn't look so distraught he would have given him a piece of his mind.  
"She just said she needed some time to clear her head." Fitz knew that it could mean she was talking herself into changing her mind if she hadn't already. Fitz ran his hand through his hair in frustration.  
"I love her Cy."  
"I don't doubt it."  
"But you think she does now?"  
"Would you if you were in her shoes?" Cy asked simply. Before Fitz could answer his phone buzzed in his pocket, hoping it was Liv he picked up immediately.  
"Mr President your daughter woke up briefly, we've just done a once over and she's doing well."  
"Great, thank you. I will be back shortly." Fitz hung up and looked at Cyrus,  
"Karen woke up. I'm going to the hospital to make sure she's okay. I'll keep calling Liv. If you see her again, please tell her I'm looking for her and that I'm sorry."  
"I will. Give Karen our love." Fitz nodded and wearily headed back

When Fitz walked back into Karen's room he knew immediately that Liv had been back. Karen was dressed in her favourite pair of PJ's clutching her childhood teddy bear, but it was the Little Women earmarked sitting by her bedside that convinced him. He walked over to Karen and caressed her cheek,

"Daddy you're back. Liv said she said you would."  
"Of course I'm here Baby. How are you feeling?"  
"A little sore, but not like earlier. Where's Liv?"  
"She's just stepped out."  
"Liv said Mom was here."  
"Yeah honey, she came to see you and make sure you're okay."

"Is Liv coming back tonight? She was reading me Little Women and we were just getting to the good part." Fitz who was already panicking didn't know how to answer his daughter's simple question scared that he screwed up so big that he she wouldn't be.  
"Of course I was coming back, I wasn't about to miss our favorite part of the book." Liv said walking into the room. Fitz looked up and found himself sighing with relief. She walked right past him and grabbed the book on Karen's bedside and sat on the chair beside her before resuming from where they had left off. Fitz sank into the chair beside Liv. It didn't escape him that she leaned away from him the moment he did.

Liv read till both Karen and Fitz had fallen asleep. When she felt that they were both out she stood quietly to her feet and grabbed her bag. She had just walked past him when he grabbed her hand. Sighing she turned to look at him,

"I don't want to do this with you right now."  
"Please Liv," he pleaded.  
"Not here." Fitz rose to his feet and without releasing her hand he led them to the empty waiting room across the hallway and closed the door behind them. Liv freed herself from his grasp and stood a significant distance away from him.

"I'm sorry."  
"I didn't know she would come."  
"She's their Mother, she should be here." Liv replied. She was the one who felt like she was intruding.  
"I'm sorry for…"  
"What? Not telling her you're dating your campaign manager," She said completing his sentence.  
"I have hardly spoken to Mellie since the divorce, and when I have, it's been about the kids and I haven't spoken to her since we got together. I never even thought about telling her. I assumed she would pick it up in the grapevines. It's not like we've been hiding our relationship. I'm sorry Liv. It wasn't a statement about my commitment to us or how I felt about you. Truth is Mellie and her thoughts don't factor into my decisions which is why I never even thought to tell her. I love you and I am willing to shout it from the rooftops if that will convince you. You've never been a secret Liv. My feelings for you have never been a secret. I told Mellie tonight when I dropped her back to her hotel that you and I were seeing each other. That it was serious. That I am going to marry you one day." Fitz closed the distance between them and stood in front of her. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him.  
"Baby you're wigging on me." He whispered,  
"Seeing you with her, and knowing you never told her about us made me feel like we were going behind her back, as though you and I were still forbidden." Olivia confessed finally relaxing in his arms.  
"I'm sorry baby."  
"Me too. I'm sorry I wigged." She replied as she dropped her face to his chest finally wrapping her arms around his middle.  
"Thank you for dropping everything to be here for Karen, for Me and Gerry."  
"It's somewhat instinctual now. I knew I wouldn't be able to concentrate till I saw her."  
"When do you have to leave?"  
"Tomorrow? I have a really important meeting the day after." Fitz tightened his arms around her with a sigh.  
"Not long to go." She said placating him.


	22. Chapter 22

Though Liv had seemingly let him off the hook there was a part of her that seemed guarded as she once was with him before his divorce. If he wasn't hyper aware he wouldn't have picked it up as she hid it well. Fitz had tried to send her home to the residence to get some rest but she refused not wanting to leave Karen on her own. He didn't think it was possible to love her more but her devotion to his kids only made him love her beyond measure. She loved them as though they were her own, wholeheartedly as they always deserved to be loved. He watched as she slept in the chair beside Karen's bed as Karen's hand gripped hers tightly for comfort from the pain and discomfort she felt. Liv who could only sleep lightly felt him watch her sleep. She knew that he wasn't completely sold that she had absolved him completely and perhaps she hadn't. She understood his reasons but she just couldn't shake the hurt she felt from his actions or lack thereof it seems.

Gerry arrived before dawn to take the morning shift to give Fitz the chance to go home and get ready for his day. He wasn't surprised to see Liv there with Karen knowing that she would never leave Karen's side till she really had to. He gently put a hand on his Dad's shoulder to rouse him awake.

"Hey buddy, you're up early."

"I thought you might want to get a couple of hours of proper sleep before your day officially starts." Knowing Fitz couldn't really spend another whole day away from the Oval.

"Thanks. I'll be back as soon as I can. I should wake Liv to see if she wants to go home for a few hours." Gerry snickered,

"You know she'll say no so you may as well let her sleep through." Gerry didn't miss how his Dad was looking at her longingly.

"You two okay?" He asked knowing that his mother's appearance would have infused tension on their situation.

"She says we are but I'm not entirely convinced. Make sure she doesn't get back on that plane without my seeing her?" He requested.

"Liv wouldn't do that Dad, but sure."

"I'll try and get everything done this morning so I can come back." Gerry nodded in acknowdgement as Fitz bent down to give Karen and Liv a kiss. Liv woke to his touch,

"Hey," she said cupping his cheek with her hand,

"I'm going to go home for a couple of hours of sleep before I start working again. Ger's going to stay here to be with Karen. Come home with me." His eyes pleaded with her as she hesitated.

"I want to be with her as much as I can. I have to head home this afternoon." She reasoned.

"I'll walk you out." Liv bargained. Fitz nodded solemnly holding a hand out to her. Liv took his hand and stood to her feet only to let go again to hug Gerry hello.

"Hey slugger. You keep getting taller on me."

"Growing boy!" He replied grinning.

"I'm going to walk your Dad out but when I get back you are going to catch me up on what's new and don't say nothing because I read between the lines of your seemingly no news of emails." Gerry chuckled knowing she had him.

"Fine. Coffee's on me. See you soon."

Liv slipped her hand into Fitz before walking out of the room. Fitz released her hand to wrap his arm around her waist resting his lips on her temple.

"Liv..."

"I know. Just give me time. I'll get there. I just wasn't expecting to feel the way I did seeing Mellie. I've always felt guilty for feeling the way I have felt for you. Mellie may be Mellie but I respect her as a person and I would never want her to think that it was my intention to steal you away from her or that we snuck around behind her back. I know you don't think what she thinks matters but as dumb as it sounds, it matters to me Fitz. I know what it took for us to get here, what sacrifices and risks you took for the opportunity to start us right. I dont discount that. I don't want her to either. I guess it upset me that she didn't know because it seemed like you and I were sneaking around and we have never snuck around before. It made me feel like we were," Olivia stepped out of his arms before completing the rest of her sentence,

"It made me feel like we were your dirty little secret." Fitz felt like someone punched him in the stomach,

"Livi," he pleaded reaching for her but she began pacing in circles.

"I guess it made me question why you wouldn't just tell her. I get that you don't factor her in your decisions but Fitz you stood in the Oval office and you proposed to me. Grant it you didn't quite mean it but you did it so I would assume that if you thought about marrying me you would at least give your ex wife a heads up. She's the mother of your children. Despite the little she seems to have to do with them my presence in their life would be and has been somewhat significant. I didn't walk into this lightly. I was and I am all in. I couldn't possibly love these kids anymore had they been my own. I'm in. I'm all in. I guess the fact that you haven't told Mellie about us makes me question whether you are and if you're not, then maybe we need to re-think this. Maybe we need to take it slow. Maybe my moving back so early in the game is premature?" Fitz closed the distance between them and took her face in his hands,

"Firstly, I asked you to marry me because I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I have no doubts about that. Hear me when I say that. Heart and soul I do not want to spend a day of my life where you're not in it or a part of it. I am all in Liv." He said with tears in his eyes. Her words pierced right through him and it broke his heart to know that his carelessness had planted a seed of doubt in hers.

"You know how little Mellie has to do with those kids. They are the most amazing kids in the world and she walked away from them without a backward glance like they're not worthwhile. Gerry is big enough to let it slide but Karen, you know as well as Ger and I that it breaks her heart not to have Mellie love her the way a mother is supposed to. God Liv you are more a mother to those kids than she has ever been. You love those kids more than she ever has. I admit I didn't want to tell her but not for the reasons you think." Fitz dropped his hands from her face and looked away. Liv took both his hands in hers trying to keep him engaged.

"Hey I'm still here. I'm not going anywhere. Talk to me." She said bringing his hands back to her face.

"I was scared that she would ruin it. I didn't want her to take your presence as a challenge. You know Mellie, she's ruthless. I didn't want her to come swooping back into our lives, the kids lives for all the wrong reasons. I didn't want her to chase you away and ruin what we had before we had a chance to give us the best chance we had. Liv from the moment you walked into my life with the exception of Gerry and Karen, you have been the best thing that has ever happened to me. I never dreamed nor imagined meeting you who would be the love of my life, in this lifetime let alone when I was already married. You have been my unexpected gift, undeserved blessing and jaw dropping miracle. I don't take that for granted. I value it and I try so hard to protect it. To protect us. That's the only reason why I didn't tell Mellie. It is in no way a reflection of any doubts I may have. I have no doubts about how I feel about you or about us. We're end game Liv." Liv wrapped her arms around his neck and drew him tightly to her.

"You have to know that nothing could chase me away, and certainly not Mellie. I love you. I told you I was all in and I am. Whatever may come our way, we face it together. You don't need to protect me. We're in this together and whatever is ahead of us, we can get through it together." Fitz tightened his hold around her waist burying his face into her shoulder as she ran her fingers soothingly through his hair.

"You should get home and get some shut eye. Your day is going to be long and hectic." She said softly in his ear. Fitz didn't move but only hugged her tighter.

"Baby, we're okay. I promise. I understand now. I get it." She said reassuring him. She stood on her toes and pulled his head down so that she could kiss his forehead then his lips. Fitz captured her lips in his desperately and deepened their kiss immediately. Breathlessly Liv buried her head into his chest.

"That so didn't make saying goodbye any easier." She said smiling at him.

"Why is it whenever you are near me I never want to say goodbye?" He groaned in frustration.

"I know the feeling. Go! If you can't get out of the oval I'll be sure to swing by before I head to the airport."

"Promise?"

"Of course. I would never leave withour saying goodbye. Even if I'm mad at you or you're mad at me or we're in the middle of a fight. I'd never leave without saying goodbye. I'd never leave without giving us the chance to talk it out. I promise you that much."

"Thank you." He said kissing her once more before reluctantly releasing her from his grasp.

"I love you Livi."

"I love you too."

By the time she got back to the room Gerry was waiting two incredibly large Starbucks coffee. Olivia grinned realising that she had been gone long enough for him to slip out and slip back in undetected.

"Sorry," she apologised as he waved off her apology.

"You two okay?" He asked. Liv saw the worriedness that lay beneath his question.

"Yeah, we talked it out and we both got to explain our points of view."

"He was just worried that Mom would come back and ruin it. We're finally a family. The four of us and Liv, I've never seen Dad this happy. Even in though you've been in Paris he's never felt so connected to anyone as he does with you. You guys even breathe in sync. Near or far you are his partner in everything. Even in parenting which has always been a one man job. He has been both Dad and Mom to us. Till you came along and you did it so effortlessly and unconditionally, and timely let me tell you because Karen needed a female figure in her life. He never had to ask and you never inserted yourself purposely you just fit from the very beginning. Mom has always felt threatened by you and if there is anything that Mellie Grant hated its that someone has outdone or surpassed her. By her finding out just how attached we all are to you, and that Dad actually left her to give you both a fighting chance by doing it right because he truly loved you is enough for her to come back and try to fill the role she has never wanted just to ensure you never fill it."

"Ger,"

"Liv, it's okay. I'm not Karen. I'm old enough to see it for what it really is. Despite how Dad tries to protect us from it. I know the truth and someday Karen will figure it out too. We're not her children, we have always been a pawn to her chess game. She had kids so that we could promote the American Family. The First Family. She just never counted on actually having to be the First Mom. We both know she failed at that. Heck she couldn't even play the First Wife/Lady convincingly till you came along. Dad didn't want you to be caught in her game. His worst fears is that yes she will demand to be more in iur lives just to spite him, but he also doesn't want her to drag your name through the mud and insinuate that you two had an affair that led to their marriage breakdown all in the name of her political ambition." Liv too had that scenario in her head and had already developed a contingency plan but hoped to never have to use it.

"As I said to your Dad, I appreciate that he is trying to protect me that you are both trying to protect me but I am a big girl. I can handle anything as long as I have you guys in my corner which I know without a shadow of doubt that I do. We are a family and Ger, I would never let her hurt you or Karen. You are not her pawn." She vowed cupping his cheek with her palm. Gerry nodded understanding the gravity of what she was telling him. Liv took the cup he handed her and leaned back on her chair,

"So tell me about this Peyton you say very little about in your daily emails but without fail is mention in every email." Gerry blushed and rolled his eyes.

"Gotta love that Pope gut." For the next hour he filled her in about said girl. Liv loved that he lit up as he spoke of this girl.

Karen awoke a little while later happy to see that Liv had stayed with her all night. Liv took a quick shower in Karen's private bathroom knowing that there would be no point in going to the residence just to shower and change when she could do it there. Just before lunch Fitz returned with numerous board games. The four of them gathered around Karen's bed. Liv sitting beside Karen while the boys sat by her feet while the table was positioned in the middle of them. Fitz kept hand on Liv's leg which sat over his lap the entire time. When Fitz caught her discreetly looking at the clock behind him he knew it wouldn't be long before she had to go. Karen was to stay another night and was being discharged the following day. She wished she could stay to nurse Karen back to health but with only weeks left she couldn't afford not to be there for the major meetings. Coop was counting on her and she needed to make the transition to her replacement as smooth as possible. She owed him that much.

"Let me take you to the airport." Fitz whined softly.

"No, aside from the inconvenience of evacuating the airport just so you can see me off, it breaks my heart waving to you as I get on a plane without you and before you even suggest it, no you may not fly me to Paris."

"No fair." He replied with a pout as he pulled her into his lap. Karen was being examined so Gerry had gone to stretch his legs while Fitz and Liv were in the waiting room. Liv wrapped her arms around his shoulder and her body moulded against his.

"I'll be back before you know it." She reminded him.

"Trust me that is the only reason why I am letting you out of my sight and out of arms reach."

"Aww Fitzgerald I think you like me." She said teasingly.

"I do, but more than that u love you."

"Well that comes in handy because I love you too."


	23. Chapter 23

Though Liv was back in Paris as Karen recovered it was almost as though she were still in DC. While Karen was confined to her bedroom to recuperate Olivia had kept her Skype window open at work and at home. Karen caught a glimpse of Liv's life. The busyness, the excitement and the fun. She got to see just how much Olivia loved her job despite the long hours and challenging responsibilities.

"Hey Carrie, Phil and Genevieve are expecting us at 7 tonight. They're sending Jacques to pick us up. Oh hey Kare Bear. How's your house arrest sentence coming along?" Coop asked realising that Karen was still online when he ducked his head in to give Liv heads up on their evening plans  
"Hey Coop! House arrest sucks." Karen replied making Liv chuckle.  
"Well hang in there, not long to go kiddo." He placated.  
"Thanks Coop." Olivia smiled to herself as she noticed Karen blush. It had occurred to her that Karen had a crush on Coop only a few days before. She suspected it was because she got to be privy to the unfiltered Coop who was rarely out of the reservation he had himself restrained in.  
"We have that meeting in half an hour. One assumes you haven't yet grabbed anything to eat?" Olivia looked at him guiltily. Coop rolled his eyes and gently threw an apple and a granola bar to her, which she caught easily,  
"You take such good care of me." She pointed out gratefully.  
"I just want you to know what you'll be missing once you desert your very best friend in the whole wide world." He said teasingly,  
"Goodbye Cooper. Come and grab me on your way." She said waving him out of her office.  
"Hey Liv,"  
"Yeah Kare?"  
"Are you really okay to drop your life in Paris to come home?" Liv who was jotting notes down in preparation for the meeting stopped to look at Karen,  
"Kare,"  
"I know I was bratty about you leaving to go back there and you know it's because I miss having you close by but I never thought about what we're asking you to give up to be with us."  
"Sweetheart, hear me when I tell you that I have never felt as though I was giving up something for something else. I love my life in Paris. I love my job and I love that I work with Coop. Will I miss it, you bet but if I wasn't ready to leave I wouldn't. This is my decision. Do you factor in my decision? Absolutely. I love you, I love Gerry and your Dad so much and I just want to start the part of my life where we're not separated by an ocean. I want to move back Kare and whatever happens I will never regret the decision of moving back because I followed my heart. I am following my heart."  
"I just don't want you to regret it." Karen said quietly.  
"I never could or ever would." Liv promised wanting to hug Karen knowing the root of her fear.

Fitz knocked on Karen's opened door. He had paused when Karen had asked the question. He realised at that moment that he was so happy to finally have her home bound that he never really asked beyond the surface if she was really ready. She often talked about the risk he had taken and sacrifices he was willing to make so that they could be end game but she was walking away from a life she loved and perhaps a career that could have gone further than she could have imagined. For him. For his life. His family. His career. When Fitz came to view the look on his face that he tried so hard to conceal revealed that he had heard her exchange with Karen. Coop was due any minute to grab her for their meeting and there would not be sufficient time to talk both of them off their proverbial ledges.

"I need you both to listen to me. I am ready to come home. Fitzgerald Grant you know better than anyone that I never do anything I don't want to. Without great thought, contemplation and a pro con list. So when I tell you I want to come home, believe me. Trust me!" Big Grant and Little Grant both nodded.  
"I now have to go to a meeting. We then have dinner with Phillip and Genevieve so I will speak to you both later when I get home. Love you both."  
"We love you too." They replied in unison making Liv's heart expand.

She blew them a kiss before shutting down her computer knowing that she and Coop will barely have time to grab their bags before heading home to get ready for dinner at the Prime Minister's residence.

Truth of the matter, Liv was ready to come home. She was looking forward to finally being able to give them the best chance they had. She wanted to be able to hug Fitz whenever she needed or want to. She didn't want to miss another Thursday Girl Date with Karen or another one of Gerry's soccer games or not be there when he finally introduces Peyton to the family. In her heart as sad as she was to be closing the chapter of her life in Paris, she knew it was time and that she was more than ready. As she counted down the more excited she got.

When Liv got home she took a quick shower and called Fitz knowing that he was more than likely replaying the question Karen asked in a loop in his head. When his private line rang in the oval instinctively he answered,

"Hey Sweetheart? You all dolled up for a night at the residence?" He asked lovingly.  
"Hardly. It's just the four of us and Phillip is cooking. Mexican no less, in my honour it seems. So we've all decided it was a completely informal evening. No dresses, no seems. So Coop and I are rocking up in our jeans."  
"You two are such rebels." He teased. Liv laughed,  
"We are in our own right thank you! How's your day?"  
"Good. Busy as always. Cyrus is filling my days with one thing or another. You'd think he was trying to keep me occupied and distracted. I'm pretty sure he's handling me,"  
"He wouldn't be Cyrus Beene if he didn't. Listen, about what you walked into this afternoon."  
"She didn't say anything that wasn't true Liv. We have all been so caught up in just wanting you here that we never really even thought about what you were giving up. For that I'm sorry." "I know, its okay. As I said, if I wasn't ready, if I didn't want to, I wouldn't be doing it. All I want is you. Us. I want our chance. I think we have both waited long enough don't you?" Fitz closed his eyes and let her words and her voice soothe him.  
"I love you." He murmured  
"Good, I have it on pretty good authority that the feeling is mutual. So we good?"  
"We're good. Go have fun with your friends. No curfew." He joked  
"Aww thanks Dad. Call you when I get home. Love you."

Time flew by quickly and somewhat unforgivingly. Between her handing off responsibilities, to packing, to spending as much as time as possible with Coop, Olivia barely had time to catch her breath. Coop, Genevieve and Phillip had insisted on throwing her a little formal gathering at the residence for her farewell. Her two years in Paris had blessed her with a renowned reputation and respect amongst her peers and leaders from all around the world. Olivia Pope owned her own name and reputation. Liv was putting the finishing touches of her make up when she heard a knock on the door.

"Since when do you knock? Come on in and zip me up would you?" She called out as she fastened her earrings on. She heard the door open and close and waited for Coop to come to her room.  
"Genevieve called, she said that the car will be here in ten minutes. Fitz!" She exclaimed happily as he stood by her door dressed in his tux looking incredibly dashing.  
"Hi," he said with a grin leaning against her doorframe just taking her in with his eyes.  
"Hi..." she replied.  
"You look beautiful Livi."  
"You don't look too shabby yourself Handsome. So do I get a kiss hello or are you just going to stand there all night and stare?"

Wordlessly Fitz pushed himself off the wall and took her in his arms lowering his lips to hers. The feeling of his lips on hers always brought a sense of comfort, familiarity as though it was something she was born to do. Each time he was near her there was a burning desire in her that yearned desperately for him. Seeing the same longing in his eyes only heightened her need for him. He ignited a passion within her that she never even knew existed let along experienced. She wanted him and there was no doubt he wanted her. Fitz kissed her gently but passionately, his hands wandered from her face down to her body. She moaned against his ear as his lips lingered on her neck. Her fingers possessively ran through his hair while her other arm just pulled him as close to her as possible. Fitz groaned and pulled away reluctantly leaving Liv confused,

"Not like this. Not when we have to be out of here in a few minutes. Especially not for our first time." He said cupping her face with his palm. Liv regretfully nodded. She gave his lips a brief kiss before leaning her head against his.  
"I love you." She murmured.  
"If you only knew..." he replied.  
"I think I have a fair idea. Can you please zip me up?" Fitz grinned,  
"Sure, but let it be known that tonight I will be unzipping you out of this dress."  
"Promises promises fly boy." She teased.  
"And no that's not a challenge for right now. We have to go soon and I have to retouch my make up." Liv rubbed her lipstick from his lips and the several other places her lips had managed to land unconsciously.  
"I'm so glad you're here. I had made Coop and Phillip promise not to let anyone else dance with me. Some of them get pretty handsy at these events." She saw his possessiveness flare and she placed a hand on his chest.  
"Hey, no caveman. You know I am more than capable of handling myself. Not to mention Coop and Phillip are as protective as they get. It's no secret that I am off limits. Comes in handy to have the Prime Minister of France as one of your closest friends and the US Ambassador for France as your best friend."  
"You'd think being the girlfriend of the Leader of the Free world would have some pull too." He said dryly. Liv rolled her eyes,  
"You'd think so wouldn't you." She replied with a glint in her eye as she stepped out of his embrace to finish getting ready. Fitz straightened his tie and jacket and watched as she finished getting ready.  
"Where is Coop?" She asked as she reapplied her lipstick,  
"Waiting at his apartment. He said he didn't want to and I quote 'bear witness to our shamelessly groping each other' Funny boy that one."  
"That's why we love him." She answered not at all surprised by his response as he had much cruder references when it was just the two of them.

Olivia felt she had the best of both worlds as she walked into the Ballroom with Fitz in one arm and Coop in the other, she felt incredibly blessed. As promised her dance card was monopolized by Fitz, Coop and Phillip, knowing that Coop was already missing Liv Fitz had given them the chance to spend most of the night together and Olivia appreciated that.

"So you're really leaving me huh?" Coop said softly as they danced to one of their favourite ballads.  
"So you're really going milk that whole deserting you thing for all that you can aren't you?" Coop grinned,  
"I sure am. Truth be told I as sad as I am to see you leave me, I am incredibly proud of you. You made the right decision. This is your chance to be the happiest you've ever been. To love like you have never loved before. That's brave Olivia Pope and not only am I proud of you, I am inspired by you." Tears filled Olivia's eyes and wrapped her arms around Coop's middle as he held her close.  
"I'm going to miss you life crazy Coop."  
"Not nearly as much as I am going to miss you Car, but we have modern technology on our side. I'll be home often and you better visit me often."  
"Oh don't you worry. I am claiming that guest room as my bedroom. Paris is a sanctuary, it always has been and even more so now because of what I have shared with you, and will always be as long as you are here."

Olivia decided to take the offer to cover Britta Kagen's maternity leave. She had been in touch with Abby, Stephen, Harrison and Huck about setting up a Crisis Management Firm after her year of covering for Britta, an idea that they had been throwing around for a couple of years. The more she thought about it, the more she liked the idea, and it gave all five of them the year to suit up and be ready to be Gladiators.

She had a whole month to get settled into her life back in DC before she started her new post so she made the most of it. She had moved into her new apartment and spent the rest of the time hanging with the Grant's. She took Ella in the mornings while James worked a temporary assignment that was too good of an opportunity to pass up.

"Sir, did you want to go through your speech?" Cyrus asked as he entered the Oval to find Fitz staring out the window not having registered Cyrus' presence. When Cyrus followed his gaze he realized why. Liv was on the White House grounds with Ella. Liv playfully chased after Ella as the little girl ran gleefully away from her Godmother. They watched as Liv caught Ella in her arms and hugged her tightly.  
"She's so good with her." Cyrus said wistfully,  
"She really is isn't she," Fitz said softly earning a smirk from Cyrus.  
"You have plenty of time for that Sir. You'll get your chance." He promised.


	24. Chapter 24

"So what's bothering you Slugger?" Liv asked as she sat beside him on the steps by the Rose garden.

"What do you mean?" Gerry said feigning confusion

"Ger, it's me you're talking to me. Just as you are able to read through me, I see right through you." Gerry glanced down at his feet and smiled.

"Come on, fess up. You know I'm just going to sit here till I break you so lets skip the part where I annoy you by incessantly asking you what's got your goat." Gerry sighed in frustration, not at Liv but what he was about to tell her.

"Mom's insisting that Karen and I spend the holidays with her this year."

"Wow," she replied surprised.

"I know right." Olivia took a breath,

"It might not be so bad. She's trying Ger. That's a start. Think of Karen, what this would mean to her."

"I'd be all for it if I knew she was actually going to deliver but Liv the chances are we'll be with her for the holidays and Karen and I will spend it standing it in the corner of some random rich people's house who we don't know as she spends the whole night schmoozing leaving me and Kare to fend for ourselves. I would rather just stay here and have a Christmas like last year. Like a family. I want to wake up Christmas morning with the people who I love and know who love me and my sister unconditionally." Liv draped an arm around his shoulder.

"I never want you to ever wake up any morning without being surrounded by people who love you. I wish I could tell you what you want to hear, that you don't have to go. I wish we could keep you both here where we know you know without a shadow of doubt that you ate the most important, but she's your Mom. She may not be able to show it as easily as your Dad or in the same way but she loves you the best way she knows how. Maybe no one's ever shown her how. But you're a part of her. She loves you in her own way. How could she not Ger?" She said running her fingers through his hair.

"I don't want her to drag us to have Christmas with her and have her crush Karen anymore than she already has. Karen so badly wants to be close to Mom."

"I know Kiddo none of us want that but she has rights to you too. Why not give her a chance to prove to you that she can be the loving mother you've always wanted."

"And if we end up at some function on christmas eve?"

"Then you tell her you want to come home and we'll come and get you." She promised knowing that Fitz would say exactly the same thing. She hated the thought of not having them around for Christmas, but more than anything she hated that Mellie had a chance to disappoint them once more and not only break their heart but their spirit.

"Thanks Liv." Gerry said gratefully.

"Anytime kiddo." She replied planting a kiss on his temple before laying her head on his shoulder as she looped an arm through his.

Olivia was back in the White House and had slid into her temporary position as Communications Director for the President of the United States of America. To say that all three Grants were happy to have her home permanently would be an understatement. Working long hours meant that she did spend a lot of time with them.

The officiality of their relationship when revealed was almost a natural progression for the American Public as she was such a prominent part of their life. Their first event together was shortly after she arrived back and started working for him again.

"Fitz, I am going to be there regardless."

"I know that but I want you to come as my date."

"Are you sure?" She asked. Fitz let out a sigh and crossed over to where she stood in the kitchen chopping vegetables for the stew they were making for dinner. Fitz took the knife from her hand and set it down before turning her around to face him. Ever since Mellie's reappearance at Karen's bedside an insecurity flared inside Olivia and Fitz cursed himself for the part he played in that. Though she never said anything directly her reactions about making their involvement more public spoke a thousand words.

"Liv, you are not nor have you ever been a dirty little secret. Mellie and I have been divorced for two years. You and I are together all the time. We don't exactly hide our affection for each other in public. Anyone who has sight can see how much I love and adore you and I would really love to attend another boring event with the woman I love by my side." Olivia took his hands in hers and nodded,

"Okay," Fitz wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him. She hated that Mellie's presence had her second guessing and for the most part was able to fight them off before they came to surface, but sometimes it slipped past her. Fitz hold on her tightened as he felt her thoughts drift. She looked up and smiled at him reassuringly cupping his cheek with her hand. Fitz leaned into her touch and kissed her palm before bringing his lips down to hers.

Olivia was in her office when Fitz found her after being in the situation room for six hours. She and Gerry walked around for a bit as he told her about his day and confided in her about his relationship with Peyton who shortly became his girlfriend after Liv moved back to DC. Gerry was open to both Fitz and Olivia about his relationship as he valued both their input. He respected that his Dad had waited till things were final with his Mom before even entertaining the idea of pursuing Olivia. That act alone showed him how much his Dad respected and loved Olivia. He also knew that Liv kept a respectable distance between her and his Dad to fight of the temptation and their natural chemistry. He had long since figured out that was the reason why she refused the offer of being Communications Director even if it was the perfect role for her.

"Hey you didn't have to wait for me." He said pointing to the clock that told them both just how late it was.

"I had a few things to finish up. Did you eat?" She asked as he came to her desk and dropped a kiss on her head. She looked at him curiously sensing that something was off. Fitz pretended he didn't notice.

"Yes, at 7:30, food miraculously appeared. The rest of the boys thank you by the way." Fitz answered leaning against her desk.

"It was my pleasure. You guys had been there for hours and from the play by play I was getting from Cy it didn't look as though you were going to make it out of there any time soon." Fitz smirked. He had guessed it was Liv that Cy was conversing with on the phone under the table,

"Why is he allowed to text you while we're in meetings and I'm not?" He protested somewhat halfheartedly.

"Because you're're easily distracted." Liv reminded him affectionately placing a hand over his.

"Kids okay?" He asked. Fitz had made a point to spend some time with them that afternoon knowing he would miss dinner and saying good night them.

"They're fine. After dinner they came back here to do homework while I worked. They headed to bed just before ten."

"I'll check in on them before I head to bed." Liv nodded knowing he always did, whether or not he tucked them into bed himself.

"Why don't you go on up. I've got a couple of things left to do and I'll head home."

"Stay the night?"

"I shouldn't." Liv hesitated, she didn't quite feel comfortable sharing a bed with him with the kids in the house, even more so after her Mellie encounter. Fitz let out a sigh of frustration.

"Then sleep in your room." Olivia felt a fight had just started.

"Fitz."

"Do what you want Liv. You always do in the end anyways." Fitz replied standing to his feet. Taken aback Olivia grabbed his hand. She wasn't opposed to staying in the guest room if he needed her but his behaviour had her confused.

"Hey, what was that?" Fitz refused to meet her gaze.

"Nothing. I'm going to bed. Night Liv." He replied about to plant a kiss on her cheek when she moved her face away looking at him disbelief.

"I'm tired. Sorry." Without waiting for her reply he stood to his feet and left her office. Hurt, still confused and now annoyed she forced herself to finish up and headed home knowing there was no talking to him at that point.

Fitz felt like an ass but didn't quite know how to take it back. He knew it wasn't her fault. That she didn't do or say anything wrong. That his patience was short and he was just looking for a fight.

Olivia had just come out of the shower when her phone vibrated on her bedside table. Sighing she grabbed to answer it knowing who it would be. Fitz heard the ringing change to silence, she waited for a moment and let out a huge breath, when he still didn't speak she hung up surprising not only him but herself. If he didn't want to speak she wasn't going to force him. She would deal with him later when he was ready to talk.

A part of Fitz just wanted to drive to her place and slip into her bed and hold her all night but after his behaviour he wouldn't blame her if she threw him out. In the end he opted for a text message which wasn't ideal but the best he could do.

"I'm sorry baby. I'm just all out of sorts. Talk tomorrow. I promise." Liv groaned in frustration as she read his message. So many things begged to be said and the most polite she could come up with was,

"Ok." Fitz knew that one word answers from Liv were never good and he wasn't in any place to demand more.

Olivia more often than not had breakfast with Fitz and the kids so he was surprised if not worried when she wasn't there the following morning.

"Liv not here yet?" He asked trying to sound casual.

"No Coop arrives today remember? She's meeting him at the airport and they're heading straight to New York." Gerry reminded him. It had completely slipped his mind. Fitz guessed that was probably one of the reasons why she stayed till so late waiting for him.

"She won't be back till Monday." Karen pointed out confused that her father had forgotten.

It was Gabriel's death anniversary that weekend so Liv had set aside the weekend for him as she did every year since they met. If Coop hadn't decided to come she had already planned to fly out to him.

Coop grinned at the sight of Liv standing in the crowd waiting for him at the airport. She broke into a smile that hid any trace of unease she felt only moments before. She tabled whatever it was that had just transpired between her and Fitz deciding to enjoy her long weekend with Coop. She had long since turned her phone off and both Cy and the Grant children knew to page her for emergencies. Liv waved excitedly till he stood before her engulfing her in a bone crushing bear hug.

"I've missed you Car," he murmured.

"I've missed you too Coop. So much." She confessed realising just how much as he stood before her.

"You checked in and ready to go?"

"I sure am. We're leaving from Gate 22. We have about an hour if you want to grab a coffee."

"Sounds like a plan."

Coop was grabbing their coffees when her pager went off. Reluctantly she pulled her phone out of her bag and turned it on. Moments later it rang,

"Hello," she answered hesitantly

"Livi..."

"What's up?"

"I'm sorry."

"You said that but it doesn't make me feel less confused, hurt and baffled."

"I know."

"You obviously have things on your mind that you're not ready to talk about. It may frustrate me but I can't force you to do something you obviously don't want to do. So you get a free pass this weekend. Let's table whatever this is till I get back. Maybe time apart is what we need."

"Liv, "

"I'm not bolting Fitz. I'm not changing my mind. I'm giving you the weekend to sort out whatever it is thats obviously bothering you. You have till I get back to be ready to talk to me about it. Till then my phone will be off so you and I can have a somewhat peaceful weekend. I don't want to spend this weekend worrying about us. This weekend is for Coop and I need to be completely present. He deserves nothing less than that."

"I love you."

"For what's it worth my doubting your love wasn't my first reaction. I love you too. I'll check in throughout the weekend." Before Fitz could reply she had hung up clearly frustrated with him.

As promised the weekend was all about Coop. They shopped, went for long walks along central park, stayed up all night talking nonsense, slept in late, went to brunches, got massages, facials, mani and pedi's the whole deal. It was exactly what they both needed. It was the type of blowout weekends they treated themselves to at least once a month when they were in Paris. It reminded her of the promised frequent visits she had yet to make.

"I've really missed you Coop."

"Me too Car. Thank you for doing this for me and with me."

"What are best friends for right?"

Her visit with Coop rejuvunated her, ready for whatever was in stored for her conversation with Fitz. Olivia found herself clingling tightly to Coop as they said their goodbyes at the airport a few days later. He was like a security blanket she didn't want to let go of.

"I love you Car," he whispered softly and meaningfully.

"I love you too Coop."

With one last hug she let him go and watched as he headed towards his gate. It had been a great visit for them and vowed to be better at doing it more often. Olivia had arrived Sunday afternoon and was grateful that she had non committally said that she would see them at breakfast Monday morning needing the extra time on her own. She unpacked her bags and set aside the bags of presents for Karen, Gerry and Ella. She had picked up the novel that Coop had bought for her from France by her favourite French novelist and laid on her couch throwing a blanket over her and snuggled into position. She was quarter of her way in the book when she inevitably slipped into a deep slumber, not at all surprising as she and Coop spent their last night together out for drinks and a whole lot of dancing. Fitz found her fast sleep a little while later. Unable to be away from her a moment longer he had made his way to her apartment after Lauren had confirmed that Ms Pope had arrived on the 2pm flight from New York. He couldn't get to her fast enough. Though she had checked in throughout the weekend, it was through the kids. True to her word she left him to sort out what was in his head without her. Which only heightened just how much he needed her. Take his shoes off he slid in behind her on the couch and draped an arm over her middle. He felt her wake and stiffen at the realisation that he was there. Fitz only moved closer and held her tighter.

"I'm sorry Livi." Olivia sighed,

"What happened?"

"Mellie came to see me." She remained silent allowing him to go on.

"She's demanding to have the kids these holidays because we had them last year and I would be happy for them to go if they wanted to or I was confident she was actually going to make Christmas special for them, especially Karen but they don't want to go and it's because they don't trust her intentions any more than I do."

"What else? Because as big as that is there's a bigger reason why you're so rattled by her presence."

"It's nothing. It's just her." Wordlessly Olivia unwrapped herself from his grasp and stood to her feet. Panicked Fitz sat up.

"Stop telling me half truths. If you're not here to tell me everything just go because there would be nothing else left to say. I don't want to talk to you if you can't be honest with me."

"Like you've been telling full truths?" He challenged. Liv went to open her mouth and closed it again. She closed her eyes momentarily and turned around. In three strides Fitz was standing in front of her both hands resting on her shoulders.

"Livi, I don't want to fight with you. I let Mellie get to me and I took it out on you because I didn't know that you've been talking to her and I'm sorry. I don't understand why you would after everything."

"She's their mother Fitz. She loves them. Maybe not in the way you do and certainly not in the way they deserve to be loved but she loves them all the same. She approached me after Karen was rushed to hospital. She called me in France and point blank asked me if I flew back to DC for Karen and I said yes. She said that after you told her about us everything fell into place and how all of a sudden you were complete. Like all this time something had been missing in you and with the kids and all of a sudden you were complete and she realised it was me. She said that I filled a void that no one even knew existed. A void she realised she never could." Fitz softened as she recounted the conversation to him. He brushed her hair away from her forehead as she spoke.

"She calls me about them. How they are. If they're happy. She doesn't know how to relate to them so she asks me. She's not a monster Fitz. She may act like it but she's not. She's driven and she's ambitious and she's completely self absorbed which sometimes translates as cruel which is never intentional. I know I should have told you but she begged me not to and promised to tell you herself. If I felt that she was manipulating me to get to you or the kids I would have told you. It was so important to her and I couldn't say no. More than that, Karen desperately wants to be close to her mother, if this helps then it's worth it. I wanted to know for myself that she was genuine before subjecting either kid to her. Karen especially. Karen may love me Fitz and I am crazy about her but it's her Mom she wants and needs and deserves to have."

"I'm sorry. I should have talked to you as soon as I found out instead of just getting mad at you. I'm sorry baby." He felt like such a jerk realising everything she did was for Karen and Gerry. That it wouldn't have been easy for her to do. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, though she didn't pull away she was unresponsive. She didn't speak or look at him.

"Livi," he pleaded,

"Did you honestly think that I would ever let anyone hurt those two? That I would purposely withhold something from you just for the sake of it." The hurt evident in her voice made his heart clench. Olivia stepped out of his grasp and began to pace in circles.

"No Liv. I just didn't think and I'm so sorry. I know how much you love Gerry and Karen. That they always come first. She just took me by surprise. It wasn't just that you've been speaking to her but you hadn't told me about it,"

"Yet Fitz but I was always going to tell you. I gave Mellie a time to tell you herself and if she hadn't by the time I was leaving for New York I was going to tell you. From the beginning I told her I didn't feel comfortable talking to her without you knowing. She asked to tell you herself." Olivia paused,

"She knew you'd react the way you did. She knew you'd get mad. She knew you would immediately think that I wad hiding something so big from you. That you'd feel betrayed. That you'd pull away. Well played Mellie. She won that round. We let her win that round." She said sadly taking responsibility for the part she played in that.

"It's what Mellie does Liv. I wasn't mad at you. I was mad that she found a way to get to you."

"I'm sorry too Fitz." Fitz pulled her back into his arms and this time she molded into his embrace.


	25. Chapter 25

Olivia hated the thought of the kids not being with them for the holidays and even if she were suspicious of Mellie's intentions they deserved the chance to be with their Mom who hopefully was going to prove them all wrong. Olivia hoped for both their sakes she would, especially Karen who was more than excited at the prospect of spending Christmas with her Mom.

"Hey Liv, have you seen my favourite sweater?" Karen asked interrupting her thoughts.

"I had Rosario dry clean it for you so you can take it to your Mom's. I hung it back in your closet this morning."

"Thanks Liv, also I can't find that backpack you bought me in Paris."

"It's in your closet with the rest of your bags."

"Liv, I can't find the jacket you bought me for my birthday." Gerry said as he entered the kitchen. Olivia chuckled, it became apparent that both of them had left packing to the last minute.

"I had Rosario dry clean it when she did Karen's sweater. I hung it up in your closet this morning." Gerry grinned and gave her cheek a grateful kiss.

"You are the best." Olivia smiled and gave his cheek a gentle pat,

"You're no chopped liver either."

"Brownies?" He asked brightly.

"Yes for your flight."

"You spoil them." Fitz said pointedly as he sat on the stool on the opposite side of the kitchen island where she stood.

"They're not here for Christmas, I get to spoil them."

"Yes, because you're all tough love all the other times." Olivia poked her tongue out at him and just wrapped her arms around Gerry giving him an affectionate squeeze. Fitz rolled his eyes.

"Liv, I can't find my new pair of vans." Karen said entering the kitchen once more.

"Hey Kare, why don't I just help you finish packing because you're tiring me out with your back and forth kid."

"Would you?" Karen asked hopefully,

"Let's go." Liv said draping and arm around her shoulder leading her back to her room.

Fitz knew Liv was struggling to let them go and that Christmas would not be the same without them but she sure put up a good front. Gerry could see his Dad's mind was elsewhere. He knew that their spending Christmas with their Mom was a sore point. Not just in general but he had noticed there had been some tension between Fitz and Olivia since too.

"Dad, you and Liv okay?" Fitz looked up at Gerry surprised.

"I'm not Karen. I'm not blind to Mom and her theatrics and manipulations."

"Ger,"

"Come on Dad, it's me your talking to."

"Your Mom has been talking to Liv and your Mom told me before Liv got the chance. I get why she held off. I know it was because she was trying to protect you both by making sure that your Mom had the very best of intentions. My thought process just didn't kick in that fast and I got mad first."

"Talking how?"

"She's been asking about you guys. What makes you happy? Things that she should know as your mother. Liv wanted your Mom to be the one to tell me, to ask me. She gave her a time frame and your Mom knew regardless how I would get the news I would be unreasonable and I didn't disappoint."

"She's something isn't she?" Gerry stated somewhat bitterly.

"Ger,"

"No Dad. You and I both know the only reason why she's demanded for us to be with her these holidays is because she doesn't want us to be here with you and Liv because she knows we're happy and we're finally a family. She knows that Karen desperately wants to be close to her and she's milking that for all she can. You know as well as I do that Karen and I will celebrating Christmas holding each other up like bookends at some random socialite party when all I want to do is be here in my PJ's watching the Sound of Music with our family."

"Bud, if you feel that strongly about it I can tell her you don't have to go."

"I'd never let Karen go on her own Dad. Mom doesn't live here anymore and she still manages to get between you and Liv. Liv has done nothing but be there for us, dote on us, love us. Dad, Karen and I have been asking her the most random questions all morning about the whereabouts of missing pieces of clothing and without flinching an eye lash she knew the answer. That tells me without a shadow of doubt that she's all in. Don't let Mom ever cloud your judgment when it comes to Liv. She's never been less than all in."

"I know bud." Fitz was taken aback by Gerry's unfailing loyalty to Liv. He knew they were close but he caught a glimpse of just how much Gerry trusted Liv and his trust has never been easily gained.

"We still have a few issues of our own we're working out and yes your mother doesn't help but it's not all on her. Liv and I are at a unique position so we're still learning to navigate that, but you have nothing to worry about. We are both in this, all in, together." Fitz assured him.

"If you guys get there and you are unhappy, you pick up the phone and call and we will bring you home. That's all it takes Bud."

"I know."

"In saying that, give it a fair go. You never know. Your Mom just might surprise you." Gerry reluctantly nodded

.

Fitz found Olivia in the rose garden with a book later that afternoon. They had said goodbye to the kids just after lunch and the house felt empty without them. Cyrus had called him into the Oval for a couple of things which left her to her own devices. Though it was a winter afternoon it wasn't relatively cold. Liv was comfortably sitting on the steps, hoodie over her head biting her lower lip in concentration. She had promised to stay with him at the Residence whilst the kids were away. Cyrus, James and Ella were to join them for Christmas eve through to New Years as they had been doing so the last couple of years. He quietly walked up to her and sat behind her on the step above so that she was between his legs. Instinctively she leaned against him and he wrapped his arms around her. Liv intertwined her fingers with his as their hands hovered over their middle. Fitz kissed the side of her head and held her tightly against him.

"I'm sorry about Mellie. I know I should have told you straight away. I just, when she asked about them she was so genuine. I felt bad for her. I know most of the time she's the Evil Queen but I guess there's a part of me that is stuck at feeling bad that I am taking something away from her that is rightfully hers. I thought if she wanted to get to know them then it was a start. I want her to be genuine for Karen and for Gerry. He already is so angry with her and I want better for him than have those feelings against his own mother."

"I'm sorry too. Liv, I need you to stop feeling like you've done something wrong. You are not the reason why I divorced Mellie. You don't owe Mellie any apologies. You and I started on a clean slate." Olivia looked up as she cupped his cheek with her hand.

"I know. I do." She promised as she turned into his embrace wrapping her arms around his middle.

Both Olivia and Fitz tried their best to keep each other busy so that they wouldn't feel the absence of Karen and Gerry. A sudden potential crisis certainly kept all of them in their toes and busy. In a way it was good that the kids weren't there, though they were terribly missed.

"Hello," Liv answered her phone somewhat distracted.

"Hey Liv,"

"Ger bud hi! What's on the agenda today?" She asked. They had only been gone a couple of days and it seemed promising for which Olivia was inwardly grateful about.

"Kare and I are going to visit with some of our old friends while Mom does last minute shopping."

"That sounds great. I know how you've missed them. So it's not so bad?"

"No, I'm glad we came. Karen is over the moon." He admitted.

"I'm glad bud."

"Thanks Liv. Are you guys still working? It's Christmas eve."

"We're just waiting for your Dad to finish his conference call. I'll make one last statement and we're done." She assured him.

"Good. I don't want you guys working because the house feels empty. "

"We won't. Uncle James and Ella are arriving soon. I checked in with the Chef and dinner is looking amazing." She caught up with Gerry till her aid ducked her head in to advise Liv that Fitz was finishing up with his conference call.

"Hey Ger honey I have to go. Your Dad is just about finished. We'll call you back as soon as we're done okay?"

"Sure Liv,"

Olivia entered Fitz's office just as he was wrapping up the call and the look on his face told her that he had managed to talk them out of their potential crisis. She walked over to him and leaned against his desk beside him placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. Fitz leaned into her touch and closed his eyes allowing her mere touch to drain the exhaustion he felt. Once he hung up the phone he wordlessly pulled her into his lap and drawing her into a tight embrace. Liv flipped the switch that locked all the doors into his office and wrapped her arms tenderly around his neck as she dropped her lips to his temple.

"You did good baby. I'm so proud of you." She said softly. Fitz looked up and met her gaze.

"Thank you." He said meaningfully as he kissed her. Liv moaned, her hands raked through his hair as he deepened their kiss. When his hands began to untuck her blouse she reluctantly pulled away and pointed up at the cameras above their head making Fitz groan with frustration.

"We can continue this later I promise." Fitz nodded as he carefully retucked her blouse in making Liv smile.

"I love you Fitz." She gave him a quick peck on the lips and stood to her feet. Just as she was about to walk away he grabbed hold of her hand and gently pulled her back into his lap and arns.

"I love you too." He replied. Liv nodded and straightened his tie before rising back to her feet.

"Give Ger a call. I'll do my briefing and grab you once I'm done, but if you're ready to go I'll just meet you at the residence."

Olivia was in the middle of her brief when she saw Fitz slip into the back of the room. She inwardly chuckled as he leaned against the wall and crossed his arms grinning at her as though they were the only two in the room. He loved to watch her work. Whether it was in her office of up on the podium giving briefings. Actually he just loved watching her whatever it was she was doing. It always warmed his heart to know that he owned her heart and what a privilege that was. When she was done and the reporters began to get ready to go they spotted him.

"Merry Christmas Mr. President. Let me guess, you're here just watching your girl?" One of the reporters asked teasingly using words he used the one of the first times they noticed him in the back of the room.

"What can I say Jane, it's a struggle to take my eyes off her." He answered with a grin making Liv roll her eyes as she approached them. Fitz unashamedly wrapped an arm around her waist.

"Well you guys have a great Christmas."

"You too Janey, say hi to Frank and the kids." Jane smiled and nodded before following the others out the door leaving Fitz and Olivia alone in the room. Liv slipped her hands into his,

"Let's go have Christmas baby."

"Lead the way sweetheart."

They had a lovely dinner with the Beene's and Ella enjoyed being the centre of all their attentions. By the time it was time for dessert the three year old was beginning to fade and had chosen Olivia's lap to climb into. Not minding one bit Olivia pulled Ella in her arms. Ella wrapped her whole body around Liv laying her head on Liv's chest contently. Within minutes she was out cold. Fitz watched Olivia continued to converse as though it was the most natural thing to have a three year old wrapped around her as they finished up with dessert and coffee. Cyrus caught that look in Fitz's eye once more. That look of longing and anticipation.

After dinner as the Beene's out their daughter down for the evening Fitz had asked Liv to take a stroll around the gardens with him feigning that he had overeaten. Hand in hand they walked in companionable silence. As the approached the garden Liv gasped.

"You like it?" He asked as she nodded. He had the gardeners light the garden with fairy lights and it looked absolutely magical, like she had walked into a fairy tale. Her fairy tale.

"Fitz it's beautiful."

"Merry Christmas Sweetheart." He murmured in her ear as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Merry Christmas Baby." She said happily leaning against him. They stood there contently in each others arms.

"I never imagined this moment. Loving someone so completely and abandoning. I never realised such love existed. I married Mellie because it was the right thing to do. Sure I cared about her, love her even but nothing like this. You take my breath away. When you walk into a room my soul feels complete. I don't even have to see you walk into a room. My heart just knows when you're near. I love you. Heart and Soul I love you. I cannot imagine a day where you are not in it and I don't want to, so marry me Liv." Liv's breath hitched as she spun around to face him with a grin on her face. As she turned Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III got down on one knee pulling out a ring from his pocket.

"Yes," she said definitively throwing her arns around him, unrwady for her impact they both fell to the ground.

"Well that was graceful." She muttered amused as they both laughed not bothering to get up. Fitz stretched out on the grass and she lay her head on the crook of his arm snuggling close to him admiring the ring he slipped into her finger.

"It's beautiful Fitz."


	26. Chapter 26

"Happy anniversary Sweetheart!" He said softly against her temple. Olivia looked up and grinned. She wasn't sure if he counted the same day as their anniversary so she hadn't said anything.

"What you didn't think I'd remember the day I finally kissed you?"

"Well you hadn't mentioned it at all so I didn't want to just in case,"

"I would never forget the day that my whole world changed."

"I thought that was when you met me." She teased.

"No the day I met you was the day it all turned upside down. When I kissed you and you told me we were on the same page everything changed. You had me from the first moment we met, but that day you kissed me back I knew without a shadow of doubt that I couldn't breathe without you."

"If it is at all a comfort, the feeling was more than mutual. From the very beginning. It hurt to be around you knowing I couldn't have you and not being around you literally made it hard to breathe. I was damned both ways."

"Now we're here..."

"Yes we are." She said bringing her lips to his.

"I have an anniversary present for you."

"Oh yeah?" He said tilting his head to the side looking boyishly cheeky. Liv nodded taking his hand in hers and bringing it to her stomach as she looked uo at him lovingly.

"Happy anniversary Baby." It took a moment and it clicked. Fitz grinned excitedly,

"Really?" Liv nodded biting her lower lip somewhat nervously.

"Oh my. Liv, sweetheart. That's the best present ever." He said pulling her closer to him while his hand never leaving her stomach.

"I know it's unplanned," she began but Fitz was quick to interrupt.

"Planned or not Liv. I want this. I want us. I want our family."

"Me too." She murmured rubbing her nose against his sweater warming them up.

"We're going to have a baby." Fitz murmured happily in her ear. Olivia grinned knowing without a shadow of doubt that he was all in. That with or without baby he wanted to marry her which mattered more than she cared to admit. She couldn't help but be relieved that he proposed before she told him not wanting the burden of forever questioning if that was the reason why he asked.

"Does Cy know?"

"No but I think he suspects. I fainted on him the other day."

"You what? Are you okay?" He asked panicked.

"I'm fine Fitz. I went to the doctor this morning to make sure all is well and it is. I took a test after the kids left. I just haven't really been feeling myself and I missed my period which isn't unusual but I had a feeling and it was right. I fainted yesterday because my blood pressure was a little low which isn't uncommon. He said I'm fine. You don't have to worry but who am I kidding. You're going to be watching me like a hawk aren't you?" Fitz just smiled and kissed her forehead.

"You're going to make this the longest pregnancy ever aren't you?" Liv rolled her eyes.

"Let's call the kids. I want to tell them, not about the baby. At least not yet. I haven't quite finished the first trimester. But I want to tell them we're engaged." Fitz nodded and pulled out his phone from his pocket having anticipated such moment.

"Hey Dad. Merry Christmas." Gerry greeted.

"Hey Slugger Merry Christmas. Someone wants to talk to you." Liv grinned and took the phone.

"Hey handsome, are you and your sister together?"

"Yeah." Immediately Liv knew something was off.

"Bud what's wrong?"

"Nothing Liv."

"Who are you talking to kiddo?" Liv sat up making Fitz worry too.

"I just miss you guys. I wish we were home."

"Oh honey me too. Your Dad and I miss you guys so much. But you'll be home right after the New Year." She promised.

"What are you guys up to now?"

"We're at Gramma's house with a million other people. Dinner is in about an hour or so and we're to entertain ourselves and not get in the way until we sit down to dinner like civilized people, because you know we're savages all the other times."

"Oh honey I'm so sorry. How's Kare doing?"

"Let's just say the novelty has worn off. We're in the study hiding till they find us to parade us around." He said dryly.

"Do you want us to come and get you?"

"Want? Yes. Need? Almost, but we'll be okay Liv. We're just homesick. We'll stick it out together."

"Are you sure? You know just say the word and we'll jump on the plane to come and get you."

"We know Liv, but its okay. We'll be fine. I didn't mean to worry you."

"Dont be silly. I would never want you to filter what you say to what you think I want to hear or so you can downplay something to ensure that I don't worry. That's never been us and don't you dare start now."

"I know. Hang on Kare wants to talk to you." Gerry handed an eager Karen the phone.

"Hi sweet girl. We sure miss you." Karen smiled as her eyes welled up. Liv had been calling her that since they first met when she was just eleven and now at fifteen it still brought her comfort and an overwhelming sense of belonging and safety.

"I miss you too. I wish we were home. I wish I didn't make Gerry come. It's all my fault."

"Honey it's not your fault. It's not a crime to want to spend Christmas with your Mom. She's your Mom and she loves you."

"Not the way she's supposed to. The way Dad does. The way you do."

"Oh sweetheart." Liv's heart broke for them wanting nothing more than to wrap her arms around them both and never let go. Fitz took the phone from Liv and gave her a temple a brief kiss.

"Hi baby girl."

"Hi Daddy." Fitz talked to both Gerry and Karen for a little bit so he could get a sense of where they were at. After a lot of reasurances and I love you's later they all reluctantly hung up. Olivia lay her head on his chest sad that they were so far away from the kids when they sounded so unhappy.

"Let's go get our kids." Fitz said breaking her reverie knowing where her thoughts were. Olivia sat up and smiled nodding quicky standing to her feet.

Within less than an hour Fitz, Olivia, Cyrus, James and Ella were bound for Santa Barbara. Fitz made the necessary calls to open up his house at the ranch in Santa Barbara not far from where Mellie was staying in her family's home. Between the time difference and the perks of traveling on Marine One Fitz knew that they would get there quickly. Upon landing one SUV took the Beene's straight to the ranch while the other took Fitz and Liv to Mellie's. Fitz could sense Liv's hesitation.

"Would you rather have gone with the Beene's?" A part of her wanted to nod, but they were a team. She sensed it was only the beginning of what was to come with Mellie.

"No, I'm where I am meant to be. Let's do this. Let's go get our kids." Fitz grinned and dropped his lips to the top of her head wrapping his arms around her before ringing the bell. When the maid had let them in she almost fainted to see the President standing before her. Mellie emerged moments later.

"Fitzgerald, what are you doing here?"

"I'm here to pick up the kids Mellie. It's Christmas eve and they're miserable." As if on queue Gerry and Karen came into the foyer. Their faces lit up at the sight of Fitz and Liv. Without an sign of restraint they both torpedoed towards them happily throwing their arms around Liv and Fitz. Liv almost stumbled unprepared for their impact. She laughed hugging them close and tight.

"I guess you missed us." She stated amused and touched.

"Totally. Can we go home with you? You're here to pick us up aren't you?" Liv stopped Fitz before he could say yes.

"We came to see you to let you know we miss and love you but it's your Christmas with your Mom and it's up to her. Regardless what she decides, you'll see us tomorrow morning for Christmas presents together and if your mom is okay with it you can come to midnight mass with us and we'll drop you back here." Mellie looked at Olivia gratefully knowing that if it were up to the three Grant's that stood before her Gerry and Karen would be packed up and long gone.

"What do you two want to do?" Mellie asked somewhat graciously.

"Go home with Dad and Liv. Go to midnight mass as a family. Come home and put our PJ's on before we watch Sound of Music. Wake up together for Christmas breakfast before presents." Karen answered surprising all.

"Then you guys better grab your stuff." Liv and Fitz tried to mask their shock while Gerry and Karen wasted no time and run up the stairs to grab their belongings.

"Mellie why don't you join us for breakfast tomorrow morning? It would mean a lot to Karen and Gerry to have you there for Christmas morning." Olivia offered sincerely. Taken aback Mellie stammered,

"That sounds lovely. Thank you Liv." The gratefulness in Mellie's yes thawed Fitz's heart towards her and recent antics. Gerry and Karen jumped down from the last step with everything they brought making Olivia chuckle.

"Say thank you to your Mom so we can get going. We'll see you in the morning Mel." Fitz said genuinely. Gerry and Karen gave all three adults a confused look.

"Your Mom is coming to spend Christmas morning with us." Liv's v explained.

"Awesome." Karen said excitedly giving her Mom a heartfelt hug goodbye followed by Gerry. As they walked towards the car Mellie watched Gerry and Karen flank themselves on either side of Liv wrapping their arms around her waist while talking a mile a minute about having seen their friends that morning. As much as Mellie wanted to dislike Liv, she couldn't. How could she? She could resent her but even that would have been a stretch because she knew that Liv and Fitz weren't involved till a year after their divorce and though Fitz was evidently smitten with Olivia she had taken every precaution to ensure they didn't betray her. For that and so much more Mellie had a whole lot of respect for her.

** I hope that clarifies the fitz and liv questions about you know... I eluded to it when he surprised her in Paris. I suck at writing intimate scenes so I just stay away from them all together. Apologies for the sporadic updates. It's been a crazy couple of months. Thank you though for reading and reviewing xx **


	27. Chapter 27

Gerry and Karen excitedly ran to their rooms to get ready for Midnight Mass. Liv found Cyrus dressed and ready to go sitting on the porch steps. She grabbed her jacket to join him. Lost in his thoughts he didn't hear her approach. He looked up startled as she sat down and looped an arm through his.

"Hey kid," he greeted affectionately planting a kiss on her temple. Liv tightened her hold on him grateful to have him in her life. She placed her head on his shoulder comfortably as Cyrus wrapped an arm around her.

"He proposed Uncle Cy."

"Good for him. You did say Yes right?" He asked teasingly all the while his grip on her became firmer.

"Of course I said yes." She replied with a smile before turning her gaze away. Cyrus cupped her cheek with his palm to gently bring her gaze back to him.

"They'd be so happy and proud of you Bug." The tears that she tried so hard to hold began to flow uncontrollably. As happy as she was she longed for her parents and it broke her heart that they weren't part of yet another milestone in her life. Cyrus knew that Fitz was proposing. He had officially asked Cyrus for her hand in marriage knowing he was the closest thing Liv had to a father and he knew how much Cyrus loved Olivia. As happy as Liv would be, he knew it would only highlight yet another significant moment in her life that they would miss.

"I'm really happy for you kid. He's a good man and he loves you. I couldn't imagine anyone better for you."

"Thank you. For everything."

"Oh sweetheart I couldn't imagine my life any other way. Having you in my life is beyond what I expected and I am grateful that I have been a part of yours."

"So how does Grandpa sound to you?" She asked looking up in time to see his eyes glisten with tears as he hugged her tighter against him.

"It sounds perfect."

Fitz watched them from the kitchen knowing that Liv was taking that moment to tell Cyrus about their engagement and the baby. They had agreed to tell the children when they got back from Mass and due to open their one present for the evening. Liv sat between Gerry and Karen during mass while Fitz sat between Karen and Cyrus with a sleeping Ella on his chest. His arm extended behind Karen, his hand resting against Liv's neck. His fingers weaved through her hair soothingly. Karen eventually snuggled closer to Liv which meant that by the time the carols began she would be out cold. Liv smiled at Gerry who as always was captivated by the whole thing. His eyes lit up at everything despite the fact that he had seen it all before. His favourite part was the Carols just like Liv who sat there waiting in excited anticipation beside him. When it began she covered his hands with hers and gave it a squeeze. It conveyed the love and appreciation she had for him. For always having her back. For always being so supportive. Gerry met her gaze and his eyes mirrored the sentiment she felt. She smiled tearfully and dropped a kiss on his cheek before looping an arm through his. She looked at Fitz who mouthed 'I love you' as his hand caressed her cheek.

"I love you too," she replied softly before turning her gaze back to the choir.

Upon returning to the ranch they had all temporarily disbursed to their own rooms to change into their pj's. This year Olivia decided to choose matching pj's anticipating that they wouldn't all be together and it was a way to feel as though they were still together. They all giggled as they saw their matching Candy Cane pj's.

"I'm so glad we're together for Christmas eve." Karen confessed feeling a little guilty.

"Me too." Gerry piped up handing out the hot chocolate. Liv dropped her lips to the top of Karen's head in understanding.

"Your Dad and I are always glad when we have you but even more so this christmas as we have news."

Gerry and Karen stopped and looked from Liv and Fitz in excitement. Fitz had confided in them that he had planned to propose to her, in part to make sure that they had no misgivings about it.

"I asked Liv to marry me and she said yes." Before he had even finished his sentence both Karen and Gerry were wrapped around Liv. James and Cyrus congratulated Fitz happily. Fitz wrapped his arms around his family feeling extremely blessed.

"It almost feels like we don't need to open presents. I'm not sure abything can top that." Gerry said sitting down on the couch.

"Now now Ger, let's not get hasty. As excited as I am I am curious about what lies beneath that tree." Karen said jokingly.

"Very funny Kare Bear." Olivia replied with a chuckle handing her a small package.

"This is from me." Karen grinned as she tore open the small box and found a voucher for a spa weekend for her and for Liv.

"Awesome! Thanks Liv."

"This one is from Liv too bud," Fitz said handing Gerry. Gerry eagerly opened a box that contained a voucher for a weekend ar baseball camp.

"There's two in here."

"You can take anyone you'd like. I didn't want to presume you'd want to take me." Liv answered wanting to give him the option of taking Fitz or Karen with him should he want to.

"Well presume away because you and I are going to baseball camp." He said wrapping his arms around her gratefully. He was a soccer player but he had confessed to her that he wouldn't mind giving baseball a go therefore her present was more than thoughtful. It was a testament to her knowing him and his trust in her.


	28. Chapter 28

"Gerry, Karen it's late. Let's motor." Liv called out from the hallway. It was their first day back to school from the Christmas holidays and neither teenager felt at all inspired to rush around for their first day of school.

With Fitz and Liv deciding to move the holidays to Santa Barbara to be near the kids it made Christmas and New Year a lot more enjoyable for all them and a harmonious cloud had parked itself above the adults that filtered down to the children. Olivia had been the one who took Mellie aside quietly on Christmas morning to tell her that Fitz had proposed and that she had said yes. Mellie appreciated that Liv had told her, that she didn't find out the same time the world did and though it still stung a little she knew that they were all happier with the new arrangement, especially the children who were thriving under Liv's care. She was big enough to admit that she wasn't born with the maternal gene and though she may love her children she didn't feel comfortable around them and she never felt the devotion that she could see eminently and effortlessly flowed through Olivia. She brought out the best in them, and in Fitz in ways she didn't even know existed.

"Ready," Karen said emerging from her bedroom.

"Me too." Gerry seconded coming out of his. Both greeted her with a kiss good morning.

After much pleading, incessant nagging, and persuading all three Grant's broke Liv's resolve and she was moved into the White House only days after their return and the announcement of their engagement. For all terms and purposes she kept her apartment in part for prosthetics but also for a place to plan her wedding and a quiet place for when she just needed to regroup. Though Fitz insisted it was unnecessary he knew her independence was important to her and that when she was ready she would no longer need to hold on to it. Olivia had already decided that after the wedding she would sell her or at least rent it out.

"Ger did you remember to pack your soccer gear?" Gerry nodded as he chewed his cereal.

"Liv, I have an extra hour with Mr McGarry to make sure I'm recital ready." Karen reminded her as she nodded in acknowledgement as she updated her planner.

"I got you new strings for your Cello. I put them in top of your case."

"Thank you. I keep meaning to ask for new ones but kept forgetting." Karen said gratefully.

"You're welcome honey. Ger, you still okay to wait for Kare till she's done with her lesson. I have a briefing till about four but I can have your detail take you home. Gerry shook his head,

"No thanks Liv. Happy to wait for the munchkin. Pey and I will probably grab a coffee while we wait."

"If you change your mind let me know and I can make the arrangements. Pey's Mom is working tonight from memory so feel free to invite Pey for dinner. I hate the thought of her eating dinner at home alone." Gerry smiled.

"Sure Liv, I'll let her know." Liv had taken the time and effort to get to know Peyton and in turn her parents. She was the only child of a university professor and a surgeon. Though her Mom was home most days there were a couple of nights in a month where she lectured in the evening. For those nights Liv tried to make sure she came home with Gerrry.

After her morning briefing Olivia slipped back in her office suddenly feeling incredibly tired. She sat on the couch in her office to gain back some strength. She closed her eyes for a moment falling into a deep sleep. Fitz who hadn't seen her since breakfast had grown worried when she didn't come in for a meeting with him and Cyrus. When he found her curled up on her couch asleep he locked the door behind him and closed her blinds. Olivia Pope never seemingly got tired so he knew the pregnancy was beginning to take a toll on her. He crouched down and ran his fingers through her hair. Liv woke up disoriented and tried to sit up when she realised what happened.

"Hey sweetheart it's okay. Lie back down."

"I missed the meeting with you and Cyrus didn't I?" She said tiredly.

"Yeah you did but it's not a big deal. Between the two of us we got you covered." Liv rolled her eyes. They always told her that it took both of them to discern the full extent of an Olivia Pope thought.

"How many more months of this do I have to go? I'm exhausted."

"Sweetheart maybe you need to slow down a little. Between the White House and the Residence you barely stop."

"I don't know slow." She protested,

"Sweetheart I think our little one is trying to demand you learn." Fitz said gently.

"Of course, like father like child." Fitz grinned.

"If I knew that all it took was a baby I would have tried a little sooner." Liv smacked him gently on the chest.

"You up for a little mid morning snuggling? I'm feeling a little needy." Fiyz kicked his shoes off and joined her on the couch wrapping her in his arms.

"You never have to ask twice my love." Their hands intertwined resting against her stomach. Liv turned into his embrace and shuffled closer to him to nestle her face against his chest before sighing in deep contentment.

"I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, did you want to come? You have a pretty big day tomorrow."

"Absolutely. It doesn't matter what I have on." Liv nodded knowingly tightening her arms around him. Fitz couldn't help but love pregnant Liv even more. She wasn't as reserved nor as conservative as the non pregnant Liv who was always so appropriate.

"Why don't you head back to the residence and take the rest of the day off. Get Quinn to do this afternoon's briefing or Harrison for that matter." She would have protested but her body refused to let her.

"Come on I'll walk you back and stay with you for a bit." Olivia nodded,

"I am guessing that I'm lucky you didn't insist of carrying me back to the residence."

"You were this close..."


End file.
